DD and boyfriend are wasting their lives

[FiddIedeedee]

DD 27 and her boyfriend (also 27) are proper home bodies. All they seem to do in their free time is go for country walks with their dogs, meals out or Sunday markets 😂

When I was in my 20s I was partying, clubbing and getting up to all sorts, I fear they are wasting their youth!

Last weekend they baked cookies and went on a long country walk with the dogs with a pub lunch. DD spends a lot of time reading and crocheting bits here and there. The boyfriend has started furniture restoration as a hobby. They’re like an old couple honestly!

DD got annoyed with me because I said to them they need to be out enjoying their 20s (and soon 30s) and not acting like a couple in their 60s. DP says leave them be but I just don’t want them to regret not living life to the full. You’re a long time old as they say.

AIBU?

Yes, from the title, I thought they had no jobs and were just bumming around. They're not!

OP is probably one of those ‘I’m mad, me’ types.

🤣🤣🤣 yes definitely!

@OutsideLookingOut has nailed it with one simple sentence - there is nothing more to add...

That
she’s happy and she’s healthy and has a lovely relationship which is the best things you could ever want

This has got to be a wind up? You are unhappy because your DD is not partying enough?!? I thought you were going to say taking drugs, drinking, gambling or gaming, sleeping all afternoon and not being able to hold jobs!

Why would they look back and regret it if they wanted to do that they easily could have. Not everyone likes to get wasted and dance on tables. Travelling the world is also a bit of a marmite plus very expensive. It sounds like your DD and her BF have their heads screwed on and are lovely sensible people.

Times have changed they are happy leave them to it. I sometimes wish I had spent more of my 20s doing wholesome activities rather than being out 3 or 4 nights a week drinking making regrettable decisions!

Edina Monsoon, welcome to Mumsnet!

I am grateful of course I am. I love her which is why it was worrying me she is cosplaying the life of an old person.

My friends think the same by the way. They joke about it because theirs are off travelling in New Zealand or have moved to Paris or whatever and I have Barbara from The Good Life. 😂

Imagine having a mother that was so disappointed in you. 😥

Are they happy? If yes then STFU.

Oh, are you trying to compete with your friends?

Ok? 🤷‍♀️

So flipping what. Your DD is her own person and that is something to look up to. She’s unashamedly herself. She’s not following the crowd. A very admirable quality and you should be proud of her, not moaning here that you want her to be the same as other youngsters

You're a crap mum, allowing your friends to "joke" about your DD like that. Take your judgement and disappointment elsewhere.

You sound horrible.

Sounds like it and she can't talk about their exciting life.

If this is genuine then they sound awesome. They can carry their genuine passions into all stages of life, what a lovely pair they sound.

Don't worry about it, keep up with your nasty comments and laughing faces about your own daughter and you won't have your barbara for much longer, simple.

Ah it's all become clear with this reply.

It sounds like your daughter has a wonderful life doing what makes her happy and not just copying your social circle.

If I had my 20s again, I'd do far less going out and be more comfortable acknowledging that I much preferred reading a book.

Let them joke all they want.
it sounds to me like your DD is a lovely person and all you and your mates can do is make jokes at her expense.
I think you’re quite mean spirited

I thought you were going to say because they're unemployed/drinking/partying etc. not that they have created the most idyllic life for themselves! I think most parents would be over the moon if their kids were happy and settled in a relationship like this. It sounds healthy, calm, balanced.
Partying is overrated anyway! Hangovers, days wasted, people talking rubbish all night. I think they're doing it right.

Honestly op this is horrible. Your dd is behaving in a way that many people in their late 20s behave. She’s getting ready to settle and that’s a good thing!

At some point she’ll work out she’s a massive disappointment to you and she’ll stop bothering.

Your friends sound absolutely awful too. How dare you all take the piss out of someone who is conducting themselves in a completely reasonable way. One of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever read here tbh.

Why are these friends more important than your own daughter?
Just reflect for a moment. You cannot accept who she is, you keep calling her "old". I don't know why you're so negative about her. Please just appreciate your good fortune.
(ps I found Barbara from The Good Life immensely irritating, Margot Leadbetter rocked. I suspect she's Margot!)

I think your DD life sounds lovely and you’ll not do yourself any favours by being so disparaging about it.
She has a partner who enjoys the same things, their pursuits are healthy and we live in a beautiful part of the world.