Husbands can’t clean kitchens

[dreamornot]

Me: Who used the last piece of kitchen roll without getting a new one out?

DH: smugly probably the person who cleaned the kitchen.

Me: Looks left at the unloaded dishwasher next to the dirty sink with a pile of stacked dirty kitchenware that doesn’t go through the dishwasher… Looks right at the saucepan with last night’s mashed potato in it sat on the stove …. Looks down at the dirty work surfaces that nobody has attempted to wipe.

In what world does this constitute a cleaned kitchen?

YABU- Husbands are excellent at cleaning kitchens, this is a clean kitchen
YANBU- Husbands live in an alternate universe where this is considered clean, but it isn’t.

YOUR husband can’t clean a kitchen. Or replace kitchen roll apparently.

It sounds like the man you married cannot clean a kitchen.

Your husband can’t clean your kitchen. My husband cleans ours perfectly.

Well, almost.

…
My husband most definitely can and does clean the kitchen. Your husband seems to have an issue with it and you’d be very justified in taking it up with him. Not sure about husbands generally…..

Mine does ours better than me. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I know men who clean their houses top to bottom while their wives can’t even switch on a vacuum cleaner. My SIL is one of them.

How can you not worship his attempts at cleaning?

Do you also have a Magic Coffee Table?

What sexist tosh! As it happens, my husband is a pretty good cleaner, whereas I'm rubbish (and avoid doing it). Don't stereotype, OP.

No, your dh cant clean a kitchen, thats not all men.

DH does the main bulk of clearing up after dinner because I cook. When he cooks, I clean up.

Mine does the kitchen better than me but focuses on different things so we make a good team. We are pretty well matched on our standards I don't think we have ever argued about cleaning in all the time we have been together.

Did you husband hide his standards or pretend when you met him? Has he suddenly changed?

He CAN, he chooses not to. Maybe because he just has lower standards (plenty of women are the same), or maybe he really thinks it's women's work.

I know several slobby women with neatfreak husbands.

I am not voting because your DH is a lazy fucker who doesn't respect you and there wasn't an option for that

Mine cleans the kitchen. I cook and wash up.

My husband isn't useless so yes, he's quite capable of cleaning a kitchen.

Mine is rubbish. Cant even wipe a surface.

and i would be lying if I said it was not a part of the decision to divorce him...

My exh was an idiot in so many ways, but he knew how to clean a kitchen. Yours doesn't.

I don’t know, but I feel like teenagers can’t!

Well they can but I resent having to remind them that plates, cups etc go in rather than near the dishwasher, and that making hot chocolate shouldn’t result in a little pile of chocolate powder on the side!

Husbands I don’t know because I thankfully no longer have one (divorced).

YABU to generalise so much. YANBU to consider your particular husband incapable.

Your DH can’t clean a kitchen. I’d of asked him what part he’d cleaned cos there’s a massive pile of pots

Husbands are capable of cleaning kitchens. Some simply chose not to

YABU. My husband cleans the kitchen just fine (and more thoroughly and frequently than I do). I've no doubt that many husbands are like yours in this respect though.

Why is he wasting kitchen roll on cleaning? That's what j cloths (or your cleaning cloth of choice) are for.

My DH is perfectly able to clean the kitchen (and the rest of the house) to an acceptable standard. And doesn't waste single use products whilst doing so.

I'm fairly confident you meant this to be a light-hearted moan about husband's thread OP. This might be a bit of a wake up call that actually, your DH is pretty useless and wasteful.

It’s really not a good idea to generalise because it turns a problem with an individual that could be addressed, into a class problem that seems unfixable.

Women do this a lot irl, partly to bond I suppose. I’m only one generation removed from a society where there wasn’t a way out of marriage (Irish, Catholic Church influence and a huge social stigma for deserted wives) and I saw that kind of discourse a lot among my gm’s generation and into my DM’s. I push back on it when they offer those sort of “men! 🤷🏼‍♀️” observations because it’s really, really important not to allow ourselves to be disempowered.

Thanks to those two amazing generations of women, I can walk away. I won’t lose my dc, my community or get put away in the mad house (and those things happened) so dh can either shape up or ship out. Family life is something we all work together on and while we have strengths and weaknesses there is no cute posturing behind sex stereotypes.

Don’t make excuses for him op!

Mine can ....but mostly doesnt!

He cooks frequently but makes loads of mess (uses every pot/pan/utensil,doesnt wipe spillages, doesnt wash up as he goes along, and doesnt put away ingredients)

He occassionally does a big spring clean and tidies everything and mops the floor but does very little day to day "maintenance" cleaning and tidying

They absolutely can ! Mine does ALL the cooking and cleaning. It’s definitely possible.