Very strange situation

[gunnermartin]

Just had a call from a friend, who was distraught after a phone call she’d had from a mum from school. (She’s given me permission to post as we are both baffled).

Last night her daughter had a friend over (they’re 10). She was making burgers for dinner and the friends daughter came in saw what she was making and said she didn’t like them can she have a bowl of super noodles instead. Friend offered her alternatives but she said no she wanted noodles. So she made her two packets of them.

Anyway this morning she’s had a call off the other girls mum saying the child went home saying she was starving- the mum asked if she’d eaten dinner and the child said my friend had made her own two children burgers but told the friend who had come round quite aggressively apparently that there wasn’t enough for her so she would have noodles as only her own children were allowed burgers.

Thankfully my friend has an all day ring doorbell inside to watch her dogs in the kitchen, which also records conversations so she had the full dialogue on film, which she downloaded and sent over to the other child’s mother after the call!

Friend is saying she doesn’t want the child in her house anymore and feels bad for her child as they are friends but I’ve also told her I wouldn’t want her in there either!

He was likely neurodivergent. Both my DH and my DS have particular ideas about what they will and won't eat, etc. Please join the rest of us in the 21st century.

Nah the mum would've gone off on you if you didnt have the cold hard evidence. I bet her daughter is a little cherub that never lies about anything - most posts on here are about parents thay vehemently believe their children in similar situations. Good on you.

Shes distraught over it? Does she have a tendency for over reaction normally

This.

I remember kids like this from school. Lied about everything. I wonder if they ever grew out of it.

We have a couple of cameras in our house, mostly for when the dog is left. Usually we flip the system between home and away mode but it’s way to forget…having a camera is your house a) hardly unusual and b) not some sort of conspiracy where children will be posted all the dark web. In this case the child wasn’t “being filmed” as that implies a deliberate action.

Well, I say all that but clearly the indoor cameras are actually for is to broadcast our sex lives to all and sundry…🙄

Do you let adults dislike foods? Or just children

That is beyond weird, thank god for the ring doorbell!

I would struggle to trust having them in my house again. There would have to be a frank discussion of why they lied and an apology before I even considered it.

Mumsnet generally speaking holds children to a far higher standard than adults. It's mental to read at times.

Eh? She specifically made something his mum said he likes.

The parent should have sent her son round already fed then. Surely if the parent knows the child will only something very specific you can't expect other people to provide that meal.
Also, the parent should challenge the child when they say they're starving as surely they will know that the play date parent will have offered them something to eat.
What I'm saying is, if you know your child is ND then give the hosts of playdates a break!

I mean, if an adult told me they only ate pasta and chipolatas, and that is what I served but they didn’t eat it, AND told people I refused to feed them - yeah I wouldn’t invite them round again either. Did you not read the post 🤣

Yep but if the mum didn’t tell the play date host the EXACT shape pasta she set them up to fail. And then he said she “refused to feed him” - you can see why she wouldn’t invite him again surely? As a parent of a ND child with extreme eating restriction you’d make sure they took food with them or had already eaten so as not to be hungry, wouldn’t you?

That is all very odd, but I would assume the child lied to cover for the fact that she asked for super noodles for dinner (probably not allowed them at home).

I think in similar circumstances I have text the Mum and said 'I was making X for dinner but little Johnny says he can't eat that - are you happy for him to have Y?' 9 times out of 10 the Mum will message and say just give him X he has it all the time at home.

I assume the Mum will be mortified once she see's her child lied, and if I was her I would probably not let my child go round again anyway so that I wouldb't have to face the parents I'd accused!

I didn’t say it was illegal, I said it was unethical. And yes, I realise the streets are full of CCTV cameras. They exist to reduce crime and I have no choice about my data being used in that way. I would suggest being filmed without my knowledge in someone’s house is quite different

Because it was in the kitchen or living room, why is that so hard to grasp? It was recording in the room where the dogs would be and the kids were in there.

I wouldn’t have that child over again. Although some children lie, that was quite a nasty lie. The child has made out your friend was nasty in a fairytale wicked stepmother kind of way, like she was cruelly withholding the burgers.
I hope the mother was suitably embarrassed when she received the footage.

I wouldn't have her back either, not just in principle but to protect myself. As for the cameras they are there for her dogs, her house her choice nothing weird about that. Also on this occasion they protected your friend from the lies told by a ten year old who is clearly old enough to no better. It wasn't just lies it was a whole story she made up, what other accusations is she capable of?

I’d be interested as to whether the mum of the liar responded after being sent the recording

I’m sure you’re right about the Super Noodles not being normally allowed. I disagree about the camera being weird, we have cameras on for our dog when we’re out and we don’t even think about switching them off when we’re home. We never look at them unless we’re worried about the dog, as I’ll bet is the case usually with the OP’s friend.

This ..i bet she was just trying to stay out of trouble with her mum.
But definitely agree its so weird when people have cameras all around the house.
Why do you need to monitor your family...super strange

Of course facts matter .. that’s why you need to quote actual facts, not make stuff up 🤣😵‍💫

your initial response: OP didn't say the child was filmed, just the audio was recorded inadvertently. yet those words were not in the OP. You have changed the narrative here.

your follow up post you’ve now said: the camera was likely pointing elsewhere. You have no idea where the camera was pointing. Again, you have assumed this and changed the narrative.

Maybe don’t talk about facts when you’re actually misquoting and just making your own stuff up 🤷‍♀️

Modern security systems have cameras in people's homes! Don't any of you look at funny clips on SM? Where do you think they come from?

Don’t be ridiculous! 🤣🤣🤣
Have you ever visited someone and the first thing you check is whether they have internal cameras 🤣🤣🤣

Thank goodness the conversation was recorded. A lie like that from a 10-year-old isn’t just a childish fib, it was calculated and intended to smear @OP. Some might say “she’s only 10,” but honestly, the nature of that lie felt disturbingly deliberate. It’s not the kind of behavior I’d feel comfortable having around my family. I wouldn’t invite her into my home again, and I’d be cautious about her spending time with my daughter.