Teacher conduct - clapping at DS

[NotUsually]

DS 13 got sent out of class today for talking to another student (friend) and not paying attention when he should have been.
He got a warning first.
He talked again to the same student a second time about 10 minutes later.
For this, he got sent out of the room to go in to isolation for the rest of the school day, followed by an hour after school detention.

As he got his stuff together and walked out of the room, the teacher started clapping at him. He said to DS "Well done you just got yourself an isolation and a detention" then clapped with his hands raised up above his head and carried on clapping at DS as he walked through the room and out of the door. Whilst the teacher was clapping, the other students joined in and started clapping too, and the teacher allowed this and carried on himself.

I've had dialogue with the school to confirm that DS was talking and to check whether he was doing anything more than this, and the teacher has confirmed that he was punished for talking when he should have been listening to the teacher, on 2 separate occasions in the lesson. Nothing more.

I accept that talking when he shouldn't have been talking and that this has received a punishment of being sent out, sent to isolation and given a 1 hour detention. But I've got a really big issue with the clapping. DS accepts he shouldn't have been talking and has aplogised about this and seems regretful for his actions. But he says the clapping from the teacher and other students whilst he walked through them all to leave the room made him feel humiliated and I've taken issue with this.

AIBU?

Lool so what sarcastically clapping is abusive now?

Focus on disciplining your child not the teacher.

Sounds like a teacher on a power trip, most of us have encountered one either in school ourselves or our family have. They exist, not every teacher uses the correct ways to motivate students. PE teachers can be particularly cruel at times. The clapping was completely unnecessary and sounds like the teacher's individual style of correction.

I suggest you tell your son that it was not okay to be treated like that but the teacher used him as an example for the class to keep everyone else in line.

I would advise him to keep his head down in those lessons and try to avoid the humiliation, I wouldn't say he was the first or will be the last child to experience it and I don't think making an issue of it to the school will help your son.

Teachers who use those methods are likely the same type that might hold a grudge against a child for a parental complaint.

When you spoke to the teacher about the incident, I presume you actually asked about the clapping? What did they say?

Honestly can't believe that teachers are saying that acknowledgement of shitty behaviour from pupils is abusive and damaging...

The clapping might make him think twice where the threat of detention didnt

I know! They’ve got all these rules, codes of practice, expected standards. Cannot even sarcastically clap anymore
world gone mad

None of the above. But I have read all of OPs posts. And comprehended them in context.

Oh.

Hyperbole much? By the end of the thread he’ll be an ASBO, drowning puppies and kicking babies.

Am I reading a different post or have others got access to info I haven't? OP is not disputing her normally shy, not wanting to draw attention to himself DS was in the wrong for talking in class twice and agrees he should have the isolation/detention for this. OP takes issue (rightly) with the teacher clapping him out the door and allowing other kids to join in with the humiliation by also clapping.
OP i appreciate this is out of character for DS but do you know if it is out of character for the teacher to do this? I imagine its frustrating as a teacher to give the same child the same instruction, not to talk whilst they are talking, twice in the same lesson and honestly that rule is pretty much a given in any classroom, but was it a moment of frustration for the teacher who made a poor decision to clap or is this the normal way of giving consequences to a child for this teacher?

A full hall of students sarcastically clapping at one student led by the teacher, sounds like humiliation.

I think you've lost your way if you're resorting to humiliation as a behaviour management tool.

In your workplace when the manager is frustrated do they initiate slow clapping to demonstrate consequences?
Do you sarcastically clap your own kids, your partner , when frustrated?

Nice bit of DARVO there. The bullying adult with all the power is the real victim here. OP must be totally narcisstic and lacking in empathy to not understand how her child forced the teacher to get the entire class to publicly humiliate them. 👏🏿

Wholeheartedly agree

Totally not acceptable, especially in a subject like PE where they teach hundreds of pupils each week and realistically are never going to be able to keep track of which are vulnerable, SEN etc. You do that for most kids, fine, it's embarrassing but they get over it. You do it for the kid with mental health issues, or other SEN, or whose Mum has just been diagnosed with cancer, then the impact could be huge.

Schools have lurched back into the past for some reason and I just don't see the benefits to anyone, teachers are more stressed, children with SEN just can't access anything, there are fewer options and its more boring. School is now all about enforcing compliance for crowd control and if learning happens incidentally along the way thats great but it isn't the aim anymore as budgets don't allow it. Not sure my two will make it through.

Or he might become a murderer. They dont tend to have empathy.

As a teacher, that’s a big no from me. Your son was misbehaving and he got a punishment - fine. The rest is absolutely not - totally unnecessary. I’d be speaking to his line manager about this, it’s really unprofessional and wouldn’t be condoned in any school I’ve ever worked in.

I have agreed with OP that she has rightly taken issue with the teacher clapping.... I'm trying to understand if its a one off bad judgement (still unacceptable) or is this regular behaviour from the teacher as he/she feels its a good way to reinforce the punishment of isolation/detention. This changes how I would approach the school/teacher about this

A brief unauthorised comment in PE is absolutely the gateway to becoming a future war criminal… /s

You joker 🤡

Like it or not, that behaviour from the teacher will act as a far better deterrent againt bad behaviour than any detention will. Your sons behaviour disrupted a lesson - he doesn't get to cry about the teacher being mean in return.

I am in the senior leadership team at my secondary school, if a teacher acted like that in our school this would lead to a serious conversation from the line manager of the department. Our job is to educate and not to humiliate. I am absolutely not ok with this.

Shame no one taught the teacher to not be a c*nt 🤷🏽‍♀️

He chatted to his friend. Got told not too. At the first opportunity he did it again. That is repeatedly. He repeated the behaviour.

First who cares if its PE. It was a lesson and he was ignoring instruction because he wasnt listening and talking. Im not convinced at all he was saying anything as twee and complimentary of the lesson he didnt like enough to pay attention to as "I really like this game it's good fun, I hope I get a go in the position I did last time". When he got told off for it he did it again. And he was minimally disrupting the friends attention

3 years in the school he will know about consequences like isolation and detention. They didnt act like a deteriant. He was told to stop it. And the teachers direct attention on the matter didnt act like a deteriant. So maybe the clapping will.

And tbh, say youre right. The clapping was juvenile, unreasonable and embarrassing. That shouldnt be your focus. It should be reminding your son actions have consequences and they arent always dished out by nice people.