Husband touched a kid to reprimand them on school trip

[ToddlerIs2]

Husband went on school ltrip with yr 6 dc as our DC"s 121 so only responsible for him. Yr 4 girl in front was being annoying all journey. Husband asked her to stop several times. He dozed off and she banged the seats again (so banding onto her knee) and he lent over and tapped her on the head and told her to stop. Off the coach the teacher spoke to him and he said sorry, didn't think etc. now head wants to see him. What's the likely consequences? We have a lot going on and I'm not holding it all together very well so at home so don't know how irrational I am. He's never smacked out kids so I know it won't have been a smack to the head etc and it was only when she got off she told the teacher. I'm absolutely fuming because how did he forget to never touch someone else's child? And obviously there's an angry parent there that there's a grown man who's touched their daughter so school will probably have to make an example of him. Any ideas what's likely to happen?

Let's hope you're not on the panel with your biased attitude based on no evidence at all then.

That would be a complete overreaction. He shouldn’t have tapped on the head but a quick word from the HT reminding about code of conduct is sufficient. The child was being annoying. Maybe they won’t be again! We really are not doing our DC any favours these days.

The child really shouldn't have been behaving like she did, but your DH shouldn't have tapped the child on the head. Nor should he have nodded off when he was meant to be there 1-2-1 with your child.
He didn't handle the trip well.
Let's see what the Head has to say on the matter

It is stressful working with young people. I have been told "don't be alone in a room with teenagers", then i am told to do something alone in a room with a teenage student. Evem though i have been told not to do that.

I have to message our students on our school messaging app. I don't really like doing that. The students sometimes say something jokey to me. And i have to be so careful about what i write back.

Some of our students take photos of us as we walk around

A female student complained about our security guard. I honestly believe he didnt do anything as this student had made up.lies about other male staff.
Our security guard was fired straightaway. No investigation.

Our lovely female teacher was fired because she gave a student a lift home in a storm
She was really nice and she told the school straightaway what she had done. She got fired.

I want to work with adults in my next job! Less pressure

That isn’t what OP has said at all rage baiter

I would be angry with my child for acting up. Total overreaction and this is what puts people off from volunteering. Call the police - what for? I am assuming he tapped the head because he was leaning over. Don't waste police time fgs.

Absolutely this. There is so much overreaction on here. He only tapped her get her attention after she had already been told to stop. I would be very annoyed with my child if someone had to tell her off on a school trip.

I have a photo of my daughter and niece from July with their teacher after a colour run, one is sat on her knee and she has her arm around the other, they are both 6. Are people saying the teacher shouldn't be doing that?

But it would be some parents reaction which is why only idiots volunteer with kids. Parent gave up a day to help a trip, some other child's little shit messes around, untraining adult then taps childs, then police involvement. No one in their right mind gets involved in this shit if their not paid to.

What is a colour run?

Absolutely she should not.

What is a colour run?

This ..

I completely agree with you. Some of the reactions on this thread to how the OPs husband dealt with this brat are quite bonkers.

I'm sorry you're getting a hard time on here - it's not as if you were the one who bopped her on the head. If I were her parent I'd ask the school what happened, and if my child was distraught about it, I'd follow up with some more questions. I very much doubt that the police would have any real interest in this - I know someone whose partner was given a caution for literal child abuse images on his phone, so a tap on the head feels very unlikely to register. Plus there are plenty of witnesses who can attest that he didn't smack her in the face. Try not to spiral and obsess over this - you have done nothing wrong, you are not in trouble, your husband needs to handle this like a grown up but he is not going to go to prison of lose his job. Probably best he stands down from school trips / school activities and just attends the absolutely essential things.

It’s funny, my own daughter is leaving cubs and I was debating if I keep volunteering once or twice a month to lead a session. Honestly managing the safeguarding stuff and dealing with the parents are the bits that put me off continuing when she won’t benefit from it. So much effort to volunteer and so much disdain and judgement from people who don’t/won’t help out.

I think this thread may have convinced me it’s just not worth it.

Im guessing you don't work with children?

But why not cough, if you’re standing over the seat to ‘tap’ then it’s quite easy to get attention without this? Touch their shoulder through the seat, all things I can imagine someone doing.
The OPs husbands side of the story just doesn’t seem plausible. Who would tap their head to get attention? Especially when he’s shown questionable behaviour already by falling asleep on the coach. Never seen a parent/ grandparent on a trip do that before, could well be a first for the school too.

If you can't intervene before they get to full feral state, that is how you end up with feral kids.

No. She thinks the overreactions from some posters are what’s wrong with the country.
It’s a storm in a teacup. It was a tap for for god’s sake, not an assault.

It's basically a fun run where they throw coloured powder all over you

I imagine the head teacher will want to hear your dh’s side of events. I would also expect the head teacher to say he is banned from attending further school trips. I can’t see the ban being extended to you but they may try keep you and the other family separate from now on.

It very much depends how the other child’s parents feel about the situation. They may speak to the police or they may leave it.

I understand your dh was tired and the child was being annoying but your dh is the adult responsible for his actions.

It seems quite an OTT from the kid and other parents. Yes he shouldn’t have touched, but lets out things in proportion. Did she need medical care? Are there marks? Did she report it immediately or wait until she was home? Does her story change sbd gets embellished each time?

I eould expect headteacher to remind parent to not touch children. If the police are involved, unless there was actual harm, they are unlikely to prosecute. The parents might be after a payout, but they won’t get anywhere as they would have to demonstrate the harm.

Why do they do that? Sorry, I've never heard of this before.

I was replying to someone who called the child in question feral though: “As an adult, you keep the peace, you don't let the feral one ruining the trip for everyone else, literally your job.”

I agree that adults should be keeping the peace. The child in question was not “feral” and tapping someone to reprimand them, which is what OP said happened; is inappropriate.