to ask you to tell us something you’d never admit IRL

[GooseAndSandals]

I’ll start with one of my less dark ones. I didn’t care when my father died.

I don't think it's worth it, your peace, your life is worth more than any money

So do I. I suspect it’s quite common. But since we’re stuck with it we just have to make the best of it.

I'm sorry someone wronged you to the extent that you felt that strongly. It would never be worth compromising the rest of your life and hurting your family.

My thoughts aren't along those lines. I'll give a benign example - The Headington Shark rooftop sculpture. It's not quite that innocent but would 'bring down the tone' of the neighbourhood considerably. However, it would impact many people. I won't throw them all under a bus just to get at one.

1st - I’m a mental health nurse and struggling with my own mental health and past trauma, but too embarrassed to ask for help .

2nd - I can’t wait until my dads mother finally passes away (abused by her physically and psychologically)

3rd - more light hearted - I pretend to listen to DH however sometimes get caught out 😆

4th - sometimes I wish I can book into a hotel on my own for a couple of days or so, be alone , eating junk food and sleep, with zero responsibilities.

That’s me. I’ve got adhd.

You can definitely do number 4! I do it at less once a year. It's only a travel lodge but it is sooooooo needed.

There are medications which can help. DS has similar issues, and a sympathetic GP prescribed Mirtazipine x

I wish my cheating ex had killed himself when he threatened to. The house would be paid off and me and the kids would not have been out through hell this last year.

1. I play nice with my dad because when he dies I have circa 800k coming to me. That money will set my children up for life and might mean I actually get to retire at some point if I'm clever with it.
2. Having a DH with poor mental health is extremely hard work. Why are we expected to be endlessly empathetic angels of sympathy?
3. Sometimes I really don't like my 12 year old DS
4. Sometimes I wish I could leave and live alone and have them visit me occasionally.
5. The place I work is bullshit. It's all nonsense corporate bollocks that means nothing except for capitalist gain. I wish I could do something meaningful that pays as well as this bullshit job does.

But that person who you acknowledge is a great person has chosen to be with you. So you have to accept that the choice of a great person is you and that all that matters. He does think he can do better so why should you.

Day to day and on holidays I'd say it's fine. We never argue, he's just grumpy 24/7. They basically never see their dad laugh about anything but at least I'm there 100% of the time to make up for it and have fun with them. I'm sure it's not to do with our relationship, that's just the way he's gone as he's gotten into his 40's. I'm genuinely convinced their lives and mine would be worse if DH and I split up. It would be nice if they could see their parents being affectionate absolutely, but it's more important for them not to be left alone with someone who doesn't seem to get any enjoyment out of anything for half their lives.

doesn't obviously.

You again. Get off this thread RIGHT NOW.

Don't respond to this poster, they are a recurring troll. I know that trollhunting is banned on here, but there has to be an exception for this level of nonsense.

I didn’t do enough for my mum when she had cancer. I saw her at least every Sunday and did lots of errands for them but I should have spent more time with her. I was too self centred and wrapped up in my own life to visit during the week after work, even though I knew she was dying ffs!! I know she would have loved to see me for just an hour. It will always be my biggest regret, I don’t think I will ever get over it.

That I will rejoice the day my dad passes on.

I hate being a mother and wish someone would take my children away. Whilst I love them both very deeply, I'm a terrible mother, I start and end my day shouting and I'm desperately unhappy with how my life has ended up. I'd turn back time in a heartbeat. I have a supportive DH who does his share, I'm just not cut out for motherhood.

Siblings are deeply overrated and cause more grief than benefit in life

Hear hear! I'm an only and have never wanted siblings.

I was raped at 18 by someone I thought was a friend.

I cannot ever tell anyone IRL, my husband knows who he is and I dread to think what the repercussions might be if he found out.

Gosh this thread is cathartic. I bet there's more.

Have you considered you might be depressed Aardvark? I was like this. An Ssri has really helped.

I absolutely name changed for this one. I had an affair when me and DH were having an awful time but I don’t regret it.

Me too. .. I thought I was the only one !

I think you have to be a little bit kinder to yourself on this one. You would be hard pressed to find anyone that hasn't done something like this at some stage in their life. I think you have to forgive yourself. A one off and nobody really hurt or harmed 20 years ago and not repeated deserves forgiveness.

Name change:

Many years ago I was having sex with a guy I’d met in a bar. During the deed I went in a full blown epileptic seizure.

When I came round a while later he was gone.

I saw him a couple times after and he’d bragged to friends in a way that made it sound like he’d carried on fucking me during my seizure

I obviously don’t know if he did or didn’t…

but I always wonder that if he did…. Does that count as rape? Am I just another sad statistic?