@Hadmysay Are you a film director working in Australia?
Seriously, I have a v different view to you. No one has to have children. If your job is so important or difficult that you can’t be there for children, don’t have them. Or change job. If you’re so self-absorbed that you can’t be there for children, and instead want someone else to do that, don’t have them.
Children aren’t ticks or trophies to collect in the game of life, or accessories to make you look good on The Gram, or pets to be played with at a time of your choosing. They’re people.
At v least, if you don’t want to be a hands-on parent who’s willing and able to drop everything when your child needs you, then don’t stop using contraception until you’ve made that v clear to the person you want to have kids with.
No man should simply assume that, by default, their female partner will do (or pay for) more than half the childcare or running a household with children in it.
Men are perfectly capable of being fantastic fathers and housekeepers. Just look at all the lone dads out there, including those whose partners have died or who also care for their sick/disabled partner, who do a wonderful job, just like lone mums.