Awful date. Tried to embarrass me the whole evening...

[brackenbury]

Is it really that bad out there? I went on a date last Friday and I'm still pissed about this issue - largely, because he had the nerve to follow up and try again.

We were talking prior to meeting for a fair 2-3 weeks prior to Summer commitments making an actual date in person a bit tough. He seemed perfectly normal/lovely.

I work as a Dr - and he asked me (on the date) exactly what kind of Dr I am. I told him a paediatrician (which is the truth).

He then - for the rest of the evening, proceeded to laugh at me and kept calling me a 'pedo' - due to it sounding similar to me being a paediatrician. I didn't laugh, but scoffed a bit initially. Then he kept going on and on and on - to the point where he wouldn't let up! I was mortified. It felt like he just crapped all over my work - which is tough at the best of time - but also like he was trying to take me down a peg or 10.

Needless to say, I left the date not wanting to see him again.

He then started texting me over the weekend and shortening the name to 'P' - to make it seem 'cute' and less offensive.

Honestly, I give up. I've had a few years of enormous grief and stress - and decided to try dating again, but I'm irrationally disenchanted.

He wants to go on a second date. I know I should just block and move on, but part of me wants to respond to him and let him know that he needs to grow up and stop being so juvenile. Should I not bother?

He's 43 years old, FFS!! I know this is a petty reason to post - but I'm just irritated that I wasted my time.

Let's not start trying to blame the OP for this man's behaviour

Block and tell him nothing.
Not your job to help the twat hide better what a moron he is.

I agree with you, unbelievable that this guy has the utter nerve to message you again!!!

The correct answer

He sounds properly deficient. Tell him so and move on.

Just text him back "l'm way out of your league, delete my number". Then block the idiot.

I think you’d be mad to see this tosser again, frankly. He sounds incredibly childish and is clearly extremely insecure.

I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing that he had provoked a response.

Sounds like an absolute dreamboat 🤮 lucky escape and yes it's pretty bad out there! But I met my lovely one online so they do work. Good luck

He knew OP was a doctor, but not what type so he asked her on their first (and now, only) date. OP telling him she was a paediatrician was the cue for his "hilarious joke". 🙄

Did you talk to him in the phone first or go straight from messaging to meeting?

I was recently in contact with a bloke on OLD and suggested a phone call. He asked to meet me instead but I said I wanted a phone call first as the thought of meeting some bloke where I know we’re incompatible within 5 milliseconds of meeting fills me with dread.

Anyway, we spoke on the phone and within 30 seconds it wasn’t going well. So, that strengthened my resolve to NEVER meet someone without at least a phone call beforehand (it gives you a much better idea of a person than messaging). It’s funny because when I was messaging this guy we seemed really compatible and I had high hopes for things. But the phone call was a disaster.

What an asshole! Tell him to fuck off and block him. You are far too good for a man like that.

I've never heard someone say before, they work as a doctor.
You're either a doctor or you're not. You don't work as one.

OP told us in her second post: "He said he was head of sales (for a Fintech company)." I bet he's lost count of the number of lives he's saved ... 🙄

How on earth did you stay in the date with him after he started saying that?? I would have left if he kept saying it

i often think this.

but can’t decide whether by telling them you’d only be training them how to hide their misogynistic tendencies long enough to get someone hooked.

sadly unlikely that he’d take an honest look at why he felt the need to belittle a woman. If that’s what he’s like at 43, I don’t think he’ll ever change.

at least he is advertising early that he is prat that should be avoided at all costs

Tell him if he wants a second date with someone, try not calling them a pedo. Then block.

He’s a nasty man trying to belittle you. Be glad you’ve found out early and haven’t wasted much time!

He was negging you to make you feel insecure. He's an asshole.

Block.

If a guy negs you and disrespects you again, get up and leave.

Oh my WORD this isn’t a petty thing to post about at all. What an absolute loser he is. So insecure about how cool important and useful your chosen career is compared to whatever stupid shit he does that he thought it would make him feel better to belittle you. So gross! You’re well shot of him.

Don't give him feedback; any future dates should get the real, awful him so they too can cut their losses at a few texts and a bad date.

Besides, I'd think it was an intentional attempt at "negging" which is popular with incel-types.

That is one of the grossest things I’ve read on here for a while.

not least because it’s probably far more common than we realise.

Well, two choices, you could tell him you don't want to take this any further due to his puerile SOH, then block him on every channel, or just block him. Personally I wouldn't waste a minute longer on this a-hole.

OMG, why are you even giving him time of day? Text him this "I dont want to see you again, have a good life" and block him. Dont try to explain anything.

He is a toxic fucker who could not deal with you being more intelligent then he is. Good job he is thick enough to show you what he is straight away.

Haha I like this as his official diagnosis. “Deficient”.

I think you’ll have to see him for the clinical case he is. Don’t respond. Block and move on.