Awful date. Tried to embarrass me the whole evening...

[brackenbury]

Is it really that bad out there? I went on a date last Friday and I'm still pissed about this issue - largely, because he had the nerve to follow up and try again.

We were talking prior to meeting for a fair 2-3 weeks prior to Summer commitments making an actual date in person a bit tough. He seemed perfectly normal/lovely.

I work as a Dr - and he asked me (on the date) exactly what kind of Dr I am. I told him a paediatrician (which is the truth).

He then - for the rest of the evening, proceeded to laugh at me and kept calling me a 'pedo' - due to it sounding similar to me being a paediatrician. I didn't laugh, but scoffed a bit initially. Then he kept going on and on and on - to the point where he wouldn't let up! I was mortified. It felt like he just crapped all over my work - which is tough at the best of time - but also like he was trying to take me down a peg or 10.

Needless to say, I left the date not wanting to see him again.

He then started texting me over the weekend and shortening the name to 'P' - to make it seem 'cute' and less offensive.

Honestly, I give up. I've had a few years of enormous grief and stress - and decided to try dating again, but I'm irrationally disenchanted.

He wants to go on a second date. I know I should just block and move on, but part of me wants to respond to him and let him know that he needs to grow up and stop being so juvenile. Should I not bother?

He's 43 years old, FFS!! I know this is a petty reason to post - but I'm just irritated that I wasted my time.

Early days Inbetweeners wouldn’t have found that funny, what a thick cunt. You’re way out of his league and I’m sorry you had to ever meet the man, OP.

Would that really make any difference to what the OP should do?

Tell him he’s a P-rick!

you do a fantastic job and parents appreciate you. I expect he feels the need to mock your profession because his doesn’t match up- regardless it’s no excuse and you deserve better.

DO NOT see him again as it’s the green light for him to keep mocking you and your profession.

What a negging pillock. Would have been very tempting to reply along the lines of, "I'm looking for someone more mature than you, despite the implications of your pathetic "jokes". You wanker."

A thicko who's intimidated by your job & intelligence. He's trying to diminutise you with that nickname in order to cope with the negative effect it's having on his ego.

Bin!

What an absolute knob head ahole, I have many more titles for him but i’m old and it’s unseemly. I can’t believe we have to walk the same earth as men such as this

O my God you’re an actual doctor and this man is a clown (no offence to clowns). He was clearly so out of his league.

I’ve dealt with several paediatricians this week due to a very poorly child and you are AMAZING. Don’t stand for this nonsense.

Back when I was dating, a couple of men were rude about my age, tried to goad me and make mean jokes. Negging, I believe this is called. One was very surprised when I didn’t want a second date because he’d believed it all went well. You have to wonder what planet some of these men are on.

To be kind I'd say it's possibly just nerves but there are a lot of blokes out there that have to make a joke about everything and can't be serious for a second. I don't know why they are like that but I couldn't be doing with it. Hope you are able to find someone else who is a lot more mature!

Also, can I recommend just a coffee or drink for a first date, not a whole meal. It’s too intense and it’s a waste of time if you don’t like them. Internet dating is such a quagmire. I went on so many awful dates before meeting my lovely husband.

Most teenagers I work with a more mature than him, what an idiot.

I know you have blocked him now but I would have had to say something like.

The ‘pedo’ thing got tiresome to be honest. I’m doctor. I treat children. I save children’s lives FFS.

How utterly pathetic - and zero intelligence to think you’d find that even remotely funny.

I once went on a date with a man who thought he’d charm me by telling me he’d never seen such prominent veins in a woman’s hands before (about 10 minutes in). He went on and on about it, as if I was some freak - I was totally mortified.

Then he had the audacity to ask for a second date - as if!! Luckily I met someone lovely not long after and we’ve been together for years.

Dating is tough but don’t give up on meeting the right person. And don’t give this silly man a second thought, he’s clearly not in your league!

No. Of course not. I was just wondering...as an explanation. I have an autistic male friend who will tell.a joke or whatever and then do it to death, because he doesn't understand that he is boring people and that it isnt funny..

A doctor was attacked because people mixed up the 2 words. Not funny at all. And that was when we tended to think people were brighter and not permanently on socials.

I imagine you have more intelligent conversations with your patients! Block. Don’t give up though, there will be decent, empathetic, intelligent, respectful men out there. Good luck, and I hope you don’t give the losers more of your valuable time than you have to.

What strange behaviour! He was possibly aware that you're brighter than he is and feeling insecure, but that's absolutely no excuse. I'd probably tell him plainly that you're not interested and why, but if you'd rather just block him, that's fine, too. You owe him nothing.

It's disappointing that he turned out to be so odd, but I would try to move past it and not let it discourage you from trying to find someone else. There must be plenty of other men who aren't that juvenile (or at least do a better job of hiding it on a first date)!

I'd have talked out the first time he said it. I have no time for such idiocy.

Also, I blocked him as of a few mins ago. No explanation.

Good for you @brackenbury, you deserve so much better than this oaf.

It’s this! Tell him to F off

Another one into the bin to not bother with again. Leaves space for you to enjoy your life and chat with other men. There are potential matches out there and it's a numbers game so stick at it!
(Or have a break if you need to!).

“You’re a Prick, a Prat, now kindly Piss off and Please Please Please never contact me again” message before blocking.

i guess sometimes we go into freeze mode so I understand why you didn’t end the date earlier, but next time if something deeply unsettling like that happens I would suggest you leave immediately.

I went out on a date with a guy last year,- ended the date after ten minutes.

Firstly the place he wanted us to eat at was too chaotic for my liking so I suggested we go somewhere else. He got really moody and offended which was a turn off, but the main issue was actually that he stunk of alcohol.

I asked him how many he had before I arrived and he claimed the drink he had jn his hand was the first one.

He was slurring his words and looking vacantly ahead. I don’t know if it’s just the way he talks but I think not. He was so charming on text and nothing like he was in Person. I told him I wasn’t comfortable and ended the date before he could order me anything.

Oh god I'm a teacher and I get horrific shit said to me on dates about how my boy students must want to fuck me. I literally stand up, tell them that joking about child abuse is deeply disturbing, and walk off.

I didn't used to but absolutely no. Zero tolerance for low value men.

This comment hasn’t had the appreciation it deserves 🤣🤣🤣