Teacher here... did I fuck up?

[ForSillyGreySwan]

I went through my classroom rules.

1. don't argue with my instructions
2. treat me with the same respect as a male teacher (had sexist comments last year)
3. phones handed in at start
4. don't talk while i'm explaining

(I am a young female teacher who doesn't want to encounter any behavioural issues so i'm being firm from the start.)

I said 'if you have an issue with any of these rules, feel free to discuss them with the principal'.

In short, one of them actually did and now I'm being called into a meeting about it with the very principal I referred them to. Meeting is at 10am tomorrow. Really anxious about it.

Your rules should really he just the school rules. Go to the meeting and accept whatever advice they give. Its not the end of the world

he normally backs up teachers on disciplinary issues

You need to research positive behaviour management OP. You’re getting their backs up straight away. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was the phones rule. Sounds like you’re asking them to hand them in which they don’t do across the board? (Otherwise they’d be handing them in centrally at the start of the day). They will think this is unfair as it’s their property.

Remember, relationships are the key to great teaching and learning.

every teacher in the school is expected to take phones in at the start of every lesson and the ones who dont make other teachers jobs much harder

This. I bet it's the phone rule that is disliked.

The rules sound quite passive aggressive to me.

nah the phones is a schoolwide thing we have a special box for them

I don't think you've done anything wrong. I am sure your principal will back you. Who'd be a teacher nowadays. Crikey.

This Surely there are school codes of conduct ? You sound weak from the off I'm afraid OP.

😂

That's such a waste of time. Why not have them be handed at the beginning of the day at reception?

maybe you should write to the headteacher and ask him

It comes across negative, so Op is starting the year off in a negative note with her class. Have rules that’s great but they could of been worded far better

Your principle should have backed you to the kid who was soft enough to raise it with him/her. This should have never even got back to you.

Are you the OP?

I'm really confused.

Are you the OP under a name change?

yes

I'm betting it's phones handed in. If that's not the general school policy, they are likely to be very nervous about it. How will you make sure they don't pick up the wrong child's phone at the end of the lesson? Some of them have expensive bits of kit.

Sounds good to me! I think 2 is extremely important and your head should support you on that 100% in particular. Female teachers getting sexist comments from school boys literally makes my blood boil

Exactly, i'm annoyed that it's even come to this. Last year, this exact student who raised it was the one who last year sat in my classroom and beamed:

'miss OP, my favourite teacher!'

Now i have firm rules its a problem?

Totally agree with this - it doesn't assume bad behaviour from the off, it's positive and no less straightforward.

Presumably you agreed your rules with the Principal before sharing them with your class? A. So that you could be clear that everything was in keeping with the overarching school behaviour code and B. So that you could clarify that the Principal thinks it is the right approach to have a threeway meeting in the event of any pushback? If you didn't do A or B then you need to have an answer for when the Principal asks you about these two elements - which presumably they will do after/before the meeting with the pupil (rather than in front of of them)?

You shouldn’t need these rules, your school should have a behaviour policy with clear routines for lessons. I don’t have ‘separate’ rules specific to me and my classroom; the expectations are the same everywhere.

Ask the principal for extra support and training when you speak to him tomorrow, it sounds like an unsupportive school.

its a school wide rule (for the 5th time)

Don't sweat it. Your head probably has a list of things they have to tick in the event of a formal complaint. As they should to prevent sweeping issues under the carpet!
Doesn't mean they disagree with you. They may ask you to confirm what you said as kids can be erm.. prone to exaggeration/ liking a little drama?
Unlikely anything you said was outside school rules as its all so reasonable!

from the tone of this I’m going to hazard a guess that you’re in the USA. We have quite a different school culture in the UK and I imagine you would get different responses if you asked on an American site.

im a secondary teacher and I find it bizarre that you take an give back phones. We don’t have them in sight at all at school: in your bag, switched off from before you’re on site until after you leave!

If you are going to be really anxious, you shouldn’t have thrown your weight around by telling them to go to the Principal if they had a problem.

You challenged, so need the balls to back it up.