Woman shouted because Dd wee’d in the car park

[Hetoldherthatmagicdoesntexist]

Dd, 6 and I were at the supermarket today
We were in a rush, had walked all the way back to car, I was struggling with three large bags, putting them in the boot.
Dd was moaning and difficult most of the day, she said she was desperate for the toilet. I said to just wait a moment as I had to put the bags in etc and we’d go back. She started getting upset saying she was really desperate and about to wee and could she wee by our car quickly. I let her.
As I was fastening her car seat, an older woman walked past and shouted’There are loos inside you know!’ in not a very nice way. I shouted back ‘Excuse me?’ She said she was just saying there were loos inside that can be used (again, it wasn’t said in a nice way’ I said to her ‘She’s 6 years and was desperate and couldn’t hold it in, she’s 6!’ She pulled a face and got in her car.
Dd was upset and asked if she’d done something wrong and felt scared of the mean lady.

It really pissed me off, was I out of order??

What’s the point of posting if you’re just getting defensive at everyone who disagrees with you? Did you just want sympathy for someone calling you out on disgusting behaviour?

Also, how did you respond to your DD when she asked if she did something wrong? Did you mollycoddle her so she grows up to be entitled? Or tell her it’s disgusting to wee in public and next time she should tell you early enough to find a toilet?

OP what you have to realise that in mumsnet world its FINE to have "doggos" shitting on pavements and pissing all over the place, but a small human having a wee is officially classed as disgusting.

Sounds like this woman is one of those!

FFS its not like she curled one up in the doorway of Asda is it?!

My youngest is a boy and will occasionally get caught out, and I have to steer him somewhere discreet to have ‘a wild wee’ in the bushes/behind a tree.I’ve explained to him that now he’s older he should make sure he goes for a wee before he leaves somewhere and I make sure I ask before we head out, we also keep a boys portable wee pot with lid shaped like an elephant in the car so that if we are somewhere and he gets desperate he can use it in the car and we can transport it until we can empty it.
It wouldn’t have bothered me if I had seen her, as it would have been obvious you were only letting her urinate in public because she couldn’t hold on.
Perhaps it’s worth asking her if you are somewhere with toilets if she needs a wee before exiting, and reminding her not to hang on until the last minute.

I bet a 6 year old boy peeing wouldn’t bat an eyelid!

I think it’s fine. Lots of animals wee everywhere and you aren’t even aware of it!

Theres plenty of rain to wash it away.

@Feb85
There was a toilet. The op decided not to bother going back to use it. So decided it was fine to let her 6 year old piss in public

So you’d have been happy to have trod in it , walked it on your shoes round the supermarket and back into your car?

You shouldn't let her wee in a car park like a dog. Take her to the toilet in the shop. If you know she struggles to hold her wee you should have suggested she goes before leaving the shop.

If the lady was mean and rude, that’s unkind to a 6 year old.

BUT, my 5yo still occasionally can’t make it and has peed somewhere yucky once or twice. I’m still embarrassed and if someone commented I’d explain to him that the lady was rude and also right. We need to work harder on listening to our body/asking for the toilet.

Thinking it’s gross for a 6 year old to piss in a car park does not mean people automatically think dogs shitting everywhere is fine. What a stupid comment.

Never had to use them but we always have
travel johns in the car for this reason. V cheap and portable.

@PyongyangKipperbang
There was a toilet. The op decided not to go back to use it

It's relevant because some children do have urgency incontinence and people shouting at parents saying it's disgusting don't know if that's the case or not.

Sounds amazing!

Well I am not happy about having to walk over dog shit residue (even when it has been cleaned up) and fox, cat or dog piss. But its just one of those things and the OPs child is unlikely to be carrying toxoplasmosis is she?

I'm sure I've stood in worse, it's a fantastic eco-friendly fertiliser, councils are spraying far worse substances all over the show.

Look you asked if you were unreasonable ....the by far greater majority think you were - you are very defensive and clearly don't. Don't ask if you don't accept the answer.

i saw a grown man a few days ago pull over in a lay by on a VERY busy main road and wee in the bushes

another i saw have a wee (man) with the door open on a public toilet.

i was a bit wtf - they are grownups but it is life. I did not see their bits! just their butts flashing - was i offended? no. i laughed

so no, a child who is desperate for a week - no issues

She's 6, she's at school and should have a level of self management. If she has a problem, see a doctor.

Try not to worry OP.
I hope your DD will forget the grumpy old bat very soon.

But that isn’t the case here, OP just thinks it’s fine for kids to piss in car parks. Plenty of parents of children with a condition would carry a porta potty anyway.

Your lazy arse parenting has resulted in your child having to piss in a carpark and being embarrassed by other people’s reaction.
maybe you need to look at what you as a mother could have done to avoid this situation!

It wouldn't bother me if I saw a child peeing in the carpark. but I don't think the lady was in the wrong either. She's not wrong in what she said and as you can see by this thread a lot of people wouldn't like it.

Another one in the long line of MN threads about things that never happened. But hey you got people to bite OP so well played

Why does it matter that she's 6? Is stepping in a 6 years old piss more acceptable than stepping in the pee of a 10 year old? At what age is it not disgusting? 10? 13? 16? 25? 42? Not to mention the smell. OP, I get that it was a difficult one, I have a 6 year old and I would absolutely not let them wee in such a public space. Pack a potty.

TBF pissing in the car park when you’ve just left a building with public toilets it’s not acceptable.
if your child isn’t toilet trained well enough to let you know she needs a wee until she’s desperate, it’s on you to remind her when you are in public and near a toilet.
No one wants to be walking thru your child’s piss