Woman shouted because Dd wee’d in the car park

[Hetoldherthatmagicdoesntexist]

Dd, 6 and I were at the supermarket today
We were in a rush, had walked all the way back to car, I was struggling with three large bags, putting them in the boot.
Dd was moaning and difficult most of the day, she said she was desperate for the toilet. I said to just wait a moment as I had to put the bags in etc and we’d go back. She started getting upset saying she was really desperate and about to wee and could she wee by our car quickly. I let her.
As I was fastening her car seat, an older woman walked past and shouted’There are loos inside you know!’ in not a very nice way. I shouted back ‘Excuse me?’ She said she was just saying there were loos inside that can be used (again, it wasn’t said in a nice way’ I said to her ‘She’s 6 years and was desperate and couldn’t hold it in, she’s 6!’ She pulled a face and got in her car.
Dd was upset and asked if she’d done something wrong and felt scared of the mean lady.

It really pissed me off, was I out of order??

She's not got symptoms of a UTI has she? That might cause urgency

Really? (Missing point of thread)

You don't piss in public areas. Period. And teach them whilst they're young!

If this did really happen, I think YABU to make a thread about it.

It wasn't ideal but you must have known you'd get told off again on here.

My grandaughter is 4 its happened in the park miles away from the toilet but in a car park i wouldnt she will always say i need the toilet on arriving or leaving.

God, this is vile. Use the toilet, ffs. How dare you daub urine on public shared spaces. You should be fined. Thank goodness that woman spoke up to show you that scummy behaviour is wrong.

Well, clearly there WAS at least one person around - and that person objected.

Maybe she's a school teacher triggered by the amount of kids starting primary school not potty trained and took it out on what she thought was the nearest offending parent? (joke!)

I can't imagine myself shouting like that but would have mentally rolled my eyes. You'd have been none the wiser though.

There weren't any mitigating circumstances though. And you were in a public place, ergo it WAS her business (that's how public spaces work).
Instead of being indignant, you should take it as a lesson learnt and an opportunity to remind your daughter not to wait until she's at the wetting herself stage.

She. Is. A. Child.

It’s a car park. She isn’t vandalising the park in her spare time. Or spray painting the sides of buildings.

She is 6. She needed a wee urgently. There wasn’t time to get back to the toilets in a supermarket (which can be very far inside and not always easily attainable).

It’s not ‘calling out antisocial behaviour’. It’s dealing with an urgent situation in a way that is necessary at the time.

You’re making it into something it isn’t. Context is everything. Something you’re clearly negating in favour of staying on your high horse.

Obviously there was people around as someone saw her. Shes not a little child shes 6 and i assume shes been toilet trained for quite a while, ig she cant hild it long enough to go back into the shop you need to see a GP. How does she manage at school at that age i would expect her to be controlling herself enough to be going just at break times.

It's not ok to urinate in a car park.

If you see someone doing that it's perfectly reasonable to comment on the fact that there are toilets inside.

All the rest is irrelevant.

‘He’s got so little self control’

Okay Kelly1969. Thanks for your comment. It’s made such a huge difference to my life and perspective.

Go and bother someone else.

No it isn’t.

Go away, bother someone else.

A 6 year old is NOT a small child. It’s your responsibility as a parent of a child to make sure they don’t get to the desperate stage, by offering toilet opportunities when they arise e.g. in the supermarket.

Yes, it is perfectly acceptable to comment on someone else's antisocial behaviour and this includes choosing to urinate in a car park instead of using nearby facilities or making other arrangements (pull-ups, pads or a potty for example).

Telling people to go away isn't going to change the reality of the situation.

I did once see a woman peeing in the trees at a motorway service station. I’d just come out of the service station and it was extremely busy with huge queues for the ladies. I assumed she had a medical issue and at least she wasn’t peeing in the car park.

I have a 6 year old and 3 year old and both would be able to hold it in for a minute to get back to shop. I 100% wouldn't let my 6 year old wee in a car park. Why did she not say she needed a wee while in the shop?

I think she probably could have held it and that you took the easiest route. But, it’s not much different to a dog weeing on the pavement so I certainly wouldn’t have batted an eyelid if it were me - I likely would have assumed a bladder problem or something at that age. It also doesn’t sound like what she said was that rude even if her tone was off, I think you’ve got to take this one on the chin!

And she'd said nothing about wanting a wee when you were IN the supermarket?

I think you need to ask her - when you're out and about and about to leave a venue with toilets - "Do you need the toilet? It's now or when we get home."

Six year olds should not be weeing in supermarket car parks. At what age will you decide she's too old?

My 6 year old niece would refuse to pee in a car park even if I told her to (which I obv wouldn't do). I would run with her to the loos and that's that.

Why is it ok and just one of those unfortunate things if a child wets themselves. “Ohh we’ve all been there.” with a little head tilt from everyone else.

But if the parent avoids getting the clothes wet by letting the child wee on the floor people are vicious about it.

Both instances cause a wee puddle. I’d rather a child didn’t wet themselves.

She’s 6. She should be able to hold it in for a couple of minutes. If she can’t then that’s a medical issue and she needs a doctor. It’s disgusting letting her pee in a car park where other people can see. You don’t know who is watching.

I don't think DS was willing to flash his bits in public since about 4 or 5 either, I thought schools did the PANTS rule from age 5 these days. It is very confusing for the little girl for multiple reasons.

If this happens a lot and she can’t hold it, how about getting some sort of porta potty? When my son was about 2 and toilet training I had one in my car. I think 6 is too old to still be doing this so possibly time to see a doctor. Presumably she’s at school now so wouldn’t just be able to pee anywhere. She may have a medical issue or possibly it’s more behavioural if you’ve allowed her to do this as she gets older. I wouldn’t think much of a 2 or 3 year old getting caught short in a car park (although I usually used a potty or bottle) but a child who’s at school doesn’t seem quite right to me.

Exactly, transferring 3 bags from a car boot, wow must take ages!
seriously, I didn’t drive when my kids were young, and so being out and about with two autistic kids could be tricky but never did they piss in public, so Op is just making excuses!