Woman shouted because Dd wee’d in the car park

[Hetoldherthatmagicdoesntexist]

Dd, 6 and I were at the supermarket today
We were in a rush, had walked all the way back to car, I was struggling with three large bags, putting them in the boot.
Dd was moaning and difficult most of the day, she said she was desperate for the toilet. I said to just wait a moment as I had to put the bags in etc and we’d go back. She started getting upset saying she was really desperate and about to wee and could she wee by our car quickly. I let her.
As I was fastening her car seat, an older woman walked past and shouted’There are loos inside you know!’ in not a very nice way. I shouted back ‘Excuse me?’ She said she was just saying there were loos inside that can be used (again, it wasn’t said in a nice way’ I said to her ‘She’s 6 years and was desperate and couldn’t hold it in, she’s 6!’ She pulled a face and got in her car.
Dd was upset and asked if she’d done something wrong and felt scared of the mean lady.

It really pissed me off, was I out of order??

Who cares?

It wouldn’t bother me in the slightest if a child needed a wee…. sometimes they just can make it to the loo. I’d just be speaking to her about not leaving it until the last second before asking.

Nobody cares, really.

It's not ideal but I also don't think the other person should have yelled at the OP. It's not like car parks need to be especially hygienic. It's very easy to judge other people and assume they are bad, lazy etc when they may just be stressed and made a small error.

My DC2 wet themselves frequently at school at age 5. Maybe at 6 too - I can't quite remember.

You really were not interested in other people’s opinions, so what was the point of the AIBU thread.

This is such a weird post.

Who care? Well quite a lot of people, including the woman.

But they don't count because 'I'm going to use a derogatory term to smear them as being upright for not wanting to witness public pissing.'

Great, so all your neighbours can all go piss on your doorstep or right outside your house and you won't have a problem with it, because they were caught short and didn't think to go before they went or hold on until they got home.

Fabulous. I'll keep that in mind if I'm passing.

Doubtful. I mean kids don't need constant access to water and snacks, I'm nearer 40 btw. But those nearer 80 (like my mother) will have definitely let their kids pee outside since there were no supermarkets with toilets or disposable nappies/pull ups when they raising their kids.
I have a vivid memory of my mum holding me over a gutter in a busy street to pee, must have been about 3. I can still remember the feeling of embarrassment/something wrong about it. But most babies were out of nappies by a year then due to all the washing.
There's just no excuse at 6 with access to toilets. OP said she was in a rush, she just couldn't be bothered to walk back to the shop.

I care, I don’t want to tread in people’s actual piss.

On her own? Are you mad?

Thank you! It’s a ridiculous comparison to make.

Dogs also shit on pavements… I’m guessing even the posters who are saying “dogs piss outside so why can’t a kid” wouldn’t be happy if every Tom, Dick and Harry started shitting on the pavements.

exactly, and its usually men, with bigger bladders, that appear to think its ok to piss everywhere. Yes, OP should have taken child to toilets.

Team ‘older lady’ here.

Yeah…2-3, not 6!

Public urination is illegal. It’s also a public health issue if people are walking through it.

I do think that’s a bit gross - did you clean it up/wash it away?

also - how did she do it without weeing on herself?

there’s threads and threads about women’s rights and private toilets.

Your daughter pissed in public so totally her business. Not acceptable and 6 is old enough to get to the toilet. Poor parenting on your part.

When you say it drives you crazy…. Does that mean you are impacted by it?

I often roll my eyes at MN being over precious, but letting your child wee in a car park is beyond grim. It would be grim with a toddler, but a 6yo???? While I probably would've just rolled my eyes I absolutely don't blame the old woman for commenting. Yes your DD was doing something wrong and no the woman wasn't "mean".

That is absolutely minging. At 6, she can be easily expected to tell you before she is at bursting point and is WAY too old to be peeing in carparks. A bush, maybe, but in public, where people can see her is grim on a whole new level. Why didn't you check whether she needed to go before leaving the supermarket? You must know if she isn't fully toilet trained.

It's your fault though, not hers. Letting a primary school age child piss in carparks in front of strangers isn't exactly a good upbringing, is it?

Also stop and think for a minute what public spaces would be like if everyone did this? Do you want to run the risk of stepping in a puddle of human piss next time you get out of your car at Tesco?

There are usually public lavatories in supermarkets. A 6 year old is old enough to learn to tell you before she’s “desperate.”

Lots of people care, really. That piss is going to be sitting on top of the ground, it’s not going to absorb in a matter of seconds like if she pissed on grass or in the bushes.

Yes it does if you are trying to run a scout camp and the kids can't do anything for more than an hour without whining that they need a fucking snack.

No you don't. Stop being a whiny, greedy brat.

Accidents happen, especially when you’re little.
It would have been better to get to the loo (not great weeing in a car park) but I really hope your DD wasn’t upset by being shamed.

Can’t help but wonder if it had been a little boy standing to have a wee, would he have been shouted at? I see so many men weeing in public, by the edge of the road, on streets and in car parks, and no one shouts at them.
Is this another way society expects some to be stronger?

Ok so yes you are impacted.

For what it’s worth, i think it’s pretty disgusting what the op did and no way would I have equated my 6 year old over tarmac in a supermarket car park

Nope, sorry but that is gross. Good on the lady for calling it out.