Woman shouted because Dd wee’d in the car park

[Hetoldherthatmagicdoesntexist]

Dd, 6 and I were at the supermarket today
We were in a rush, had walked all the way back to car, I was struggling with three large bags, putting them in the boot.
Dd was moaning and difficult most of the day, she said she was desperate for the toilet. I said to just wait a moment as I had to put the bags in etc and we’d go back. She started getting upset saying she was really desperate and about to wee and could she wee by our car quickly. I let her.
As I was fastening her car seat, an older woman walked past and shouted’There are loos inside you know!’ in not a very nice way. I shouted back ‘Excuse me?’ She said she was just saying there were loos inside that can be used (again, it wasn’t said in a nice way’ I said to her ‘She’s 6 years and was desperate and couldn’t hold it in, she’s 6!’ She pulled a face and got in her car.
Dd was upset and asked if she’d done something wrong and felt scared of the mean lady.

It really pissed me off, was I out of order??

This says it all. Seems like the majority of people have unreasonable expectations of how well some children can hold wee, we’re all different and I know my son is exactly the same as your dd, doesn’t matter if we take him he’s one of those that can’t properly release under pressure so even with regular toilet breaks this still happens, who knows this could be medical or it could be were are anatomically different or slightly different brains/receptors or something. I think people actually forget that dogs and cats are weeing everywhere too, there isn’t even anything toxic in wee (it’s not like poo) so what’s the big deal due to an emergency? I’ve never seen anyone shout at a dog for spraying outside.

Besides, urinating in public is an arrest-able offence and as her parent, that would’ve been you.

It gets better 😆😆😆

All these people saying she needs a Dr.....no,

You know if the OP started a thread saying "my 6 yr old got caught short and had to have a wee in public, do I need to see a doctor?" she would be criticised for wasting the GPs time.

Oh and also my son regularly wets himself anyway so ignoring emergency requests this would definitely still be the outcome. Wetting themselves is still normal amongst friends we know even at age 6-7!! Really people can only understand what they know about children they’ve raised.. and yes my son didn’t wear nappies from age 2.

And yes even children that have these continence issues below age 7 are not even referred for a problem at this age as it’s within realms of normal, that’s a surprisingly large age range.

Imagine getting this worked up over a child weeing!

Portapotties exist.

I don't know anyone who carries one of this around with them unless they are going camping. What happens if you are on foot, but hard to carry?

MN police would bring back hanging for this offence!

At some point you will have to teach her it’s not acceptable or she’ll still be doing it at 16.

It's a slippery slope!

No. Not publicly acceptable behaviour And rightly called out.

Small children is 2/3yo who haven't yet worked out when to wee. Humans have to learn to hold it in and start learning how to wait very quickly after potty training. You weren't in the middle of nowhere, where a wild wee wouldn't matter, you were across the car park from a toilet. If your DD can't yet wait for a mere 3 minutes when she's 6, then you really need a doctor because that is abnormal for her age.

My DD was the same but to be quite honest she needed to learn to tell me sooner when she needed the bathroom rather than always holding on to the desperate last minute.
I’m not offended by the pee in the car park, but our kids do need to learn their own body signs. It’s part of growing up.

I’ve never seen anyone shout at a dog for spraying outside.

Or wash it away with water or run around after their cat with a litter tray. Which surprises me as I thought it was all about being prepared. 🤷🏻‍♀️

One of my kids struggles to hold it sometimes as she has renal issues (she is 4). I have a travel potty for emergencies. If she is still struggling to notice she needs until she is absolutely desperate, maybe worth chatting with GP as this was one of my daughter’s symptoms.

MN police would bring back hanging for this offence!

You gotta love the Friday nighters!

So do you call out every dog owner who let's their manky mutt piss and shit on pavements/in parks (etc)? Why is this socially acceptable? And those of you who think nothing of letting little Tarquin have a 'wild wee' on a woodland walk, how is this any different? A kid having a quick wee in public isn't really doing any harm, just look away.

Let's be honest if it was a boy, by any type of bush or tree or grass.. you wouldn't have gotten a second glance or comment.

I don't know, sometimes emergencies happen.. 6 is a little old, and the carpark is close enough that had you dashed, she probably could have held.

Big learning moment for your daughter though, to say that she needs before it gets that desperate.

The question is would she have shouted a drunk person pissing on the street...my guess she wouldn't but so brave to discipline a small child!

Especially when it's covered in piss!

🤣

It’s still piss, OP. It’s not like child urine is clean and smell-free. Luckily it’s been raining a fair bit but that’s so rank and disgusting, especially during a hot period. I really can’t believe a 6 year old couldn’t hold it to walk back in unless she has a medical condition. She’s not “little” and nobody would perceive her as such. They’d just think you and her were feral and I’m glad she called you out. I would probably have been too scared and just looked at you with disgust but my god would I have judged you and your daughter.
im also surprised that she willingly urinated in a public car park. No way would mine do that unless truly desperate and no toilets for miles.

Even if the child really did ask that (unlikely, I agree), the answer should have been yes, she did do something wrong - encouraged by the OP. Humans past the toilet-training age should have been taught that civilised people don’t piss in public.
Either she needs to pay attention sooner to her body telling her she needs a toilet, or she needs medical help. It must be one or the other. She’s six, not two or three.

6 yr old is not a small child. By that age they are established at knowing when they need the bathroom. If you chose not to listen to her in the shopping centre, that's on you.

Well no, most women wouldn’t due to understandable fear of violence and reprisals but it turns my stomach to see anyone urinating in public. It’s grim, whether child or adult. Also she wasn’t telling off the child, she was saying to the mum there’s fricking toilets inside the supermarket- don’t let your child just hoik her pants down and piss wherever takes her fancy. It sounds like she was polite but I guess to the sort of person who thinks it’s fine to let your child do this, she was mean.

6! You really really really need to parent better. Additional needs notwithstanding

Ps 6 is not little. How embarrassing for her.
did she not convey her needs to you or did you not listen.
presumably you would like her to be able to have friends and play dates. This behaviour is not compatible. She’s at school! Does she interrupt lessons and pee in class.
this babying of kids needs to stop.