To think this is a really awful thing to say? Tw

[Goldyy]

Referring to children who don’t have behavioural issues or SEND as ‘normal’ children?

Oh, brilliant. Another thread wherein parents of children with SEN and parents of those children without SEN argue/debate acceptable vs unacceptable lingo.
As a parent of two children with SEN, I don't get worked up by people using the word 'normal', as it doesn't make me think or feel that my children are abnormal.
All the NT vs ND, Allistic vs Autistic, SEN vs non-SEN on MN/FB etc is bloody tiresome.
And, the thread title really did not require a trigger warning.

ODFOD.

You are being very self centred. Be grateful that your children don’t have any additional needs.
So what those with additional needs are called special needs. They are not called special and even if they were can’t you find some kindness for the hardship they and their parents go to let go of the word special.

You are not a very nice person for having such attitude against sen children.

Your comment is ridiculous and shows a complete lack of thinking in your ankle-breaking rush to be nasty about it.

SEND is Special Educational Needs - not 'Special Children's Needs.'

I have an autistic DC and this doesn’t bother me OP. The correct lingo is ‘typical’ or ‘typically developing’ rather than ‘normal’, but you won’t know that unless you actually have a child with additional needs. There’s no need to get upset with people just because they don’t know something that’s not exactly an everyday term for most.

If they are not normal children then what are they?

Typical is the usual word ime.

It’s not saying THEY are special, it’s that they have needs that are special. As if you’re insulted about not having disabled kids.

That’s it special treatment, it’s simply to make things equitable with everyone else. The vast majority of kids with SEND don’t get 1 to 1 time, or any ‘free gizmos’. Do you have any idea the cost of things as simple as coloured lenses for kids with visual stress or screen reader software for visual impairments?

Typical or typically developing is the word I hear most,

I have 4 autistic kids, 3 of which are adults now. Over the years I’ve had to buy
special needs buggies to keep them safe, nappies way past when a typical kid was out of them, adapted clothing to prevent shit smearing at night, I’ve had to repair doors and windows and walls that were damaged in melt downs. Any family trips meant taking another adult with me, a PA I’d have to pay. Specialised childcare as normal settings wouldn’t take them, driving them around when other kids could get buses. Special food for the ARFID ones and the ones with allergies, autism often comes either comorbidities in our case 3 have Eds, one has Pots, one is severely dyslexic, 2 have adhd, they all have sleep disturbance, so I often had to hire night Nannies so I could sleep more than 2 hours a night occasionally. One uses an AAC and sign, so I had to learn BSL which isn’t free.

but tell me again how it’s just extra cash to spend on nice things.

Normal, means what is typical or relating to the majority. We don't need to beat around the bush with different kind of language because when you ban certain words you only achieve in making them more weaponised to those who would use them as such. Say it for what it is. Of course SEND kids aren't normal in terms of education. If we had no normal, with which to refererence then there wouldnt even be any SEND category or any other outlier category for that matter. Normal is what sets the base standard for literally everything we perceive in life.

I think if this is someone's bar for 'really awful', they're in for a rough ride through life. It may not be the most delicate or widely approved word choice, but it's true. Children without special needs by definition are the norm, therefore it's not surprising that someone would say they are 'normal' without intending any slight toward children who don't fall within the norm.

As it becomes increasingly difficult to navigate the minefield of what's currently considered acceptable language, more and more people will either be silenced or stop attempting to use 'correct' language. Why even bother when you can do your honest best and still be judged as really awful?

Unless a doctor, nurse, teacher or parent on mn, I wouldn’t expect most people 50+ to use NT and ND.

Why? some of us 50+ year olds are ND.

That is not special treatment. Those are reasonable adjustments so that they can access education.

Why? I'm over 50, with no contact with anyone who is ND and yet I use the terms NT and ND

The special refers to the Needs, not the child.

Your child’s Needs are standard/off the peg. Other children have needs that require a special or tailored solution.

But you knew that anyway.

are you actually annoyed about disabled children getting additional help?

Some pp have clearly never heard the saying "equity over equality". Not a very nice thread to read through 🫤

But OP my best friends oldest DC is disabled, she will never walk, talk and will wear nappies all her life. My friend refers to her other kids as "normal" with the air quotes whenever she is trying to explain something relevant. Sometimes in the moment there isn't another word, I wouldn't get too worked up about it.

Wow @TempNameForObviousReasons !

The reasons are obvious! Are you from the Daily Mail or are you simply not very nice?

I've got two SEN and one without and I've probably said normal for an easy life and wouldn't ever dream of being offended by anyone saying that. Normal doesn't mean better in this context, it means not SEN.