They have no idea of reality if they think they're going to get "a lot of money". My DS receives DLA because of disabilities caused by a brain tumour and the treatment for it. He gets fuck all special treatment and, as I said to another poster, the highest level of DLA, while better than nothing, doesn't even cover the mortgage payment, let alone everything I have to buy because nothing necessary is provided by the NHS, even when we're in hospital (e.g. numbing cream before injections/canulas, special food, toys to strengthen his hand muscles, special cutlery and mats to help him eat, physio, special toothpaste and mouthwash to try and combat the tooth damage caused by radiation etc) - all this on top of the fact that my work capacity is limited because I am a effectively a full time carer. We are surviving on rapidly dwindling savings.
As for school, while we finally have an EHCP, the school refuses to comply with it. Despite knowing he is now colour blind, teachers write on the white board in colour (which he can't see at all); despite knowing he is now hearing impaired, they refuse to make requested adjustments, like provide handouts/have him sit at the front of the classroom so he can lipread; when he puts his hand up to ask for the teacher to repeat what he hasn't heard, he is shouted at "don't make me repeat myself"; he is told he is the only one out of his 3 form year group that can't go on the school residential because it's "too risky" to take him, yet they won't simply think of a different residential that all children can participate in; I was told not to bring DS to school for an entire week, because there were no staff to support him, yet he was then marked down as having unauthorised absence, which the school refuse to correct; he does not received the 1:1 support his EHCP says he needs; the school refuses to address bullying that occurs specifically because DS is now disabled (e.g. he has to wear a hat outside because he still has no hair and is at greater risk of skin cancer than other children - an older child regularly runs up behind him, steals his hat and then taunts him about how he can't catch up and how slow he is because he has ataxia and is unsteady on his feet following brain surgery; another child holds him down on the ground and throws things at his head, while a teacher watches and does nothing, and know DS can't fight back because he's (a) trying to protect his head and (b) doesn't have the balance to get up without crawling onto all fours and using his hands to help. I could go on, but I think this gives you an idea.).
I appreciate many people on here automatically think autism when they think SEND, but it encompasses children with many different needs. I also wouldn't begrudge people who need it from applying for extra support, and I wouldn't think the little I see in public gives me enough knowledge to question how much support they need. A friend is ND and has 3 ND children and a DH who doesn't really help. The youngest child needs significant help, is frequently sent home from school because of meltdowns (friend has to leave work to collect him and then spend the afternoon trying to calm DC and identify what went wrong and politely tell the school to pull their finger out etc), isn't allowed on school trips unless my friend takes a week off work to accompany him, needs her to leave work early every week to collect him from school, take him the therapy and make sure he stays there (rather than running off) etc. It's not an easy life.
A little more empathy for each other would go a long way. Assuming most people are trying to scam the (broken absolutely unit for purpose) system is unhelpful and causes division where it isn't needed.