To be putoff intimacy with DP due to this?

[Justinegh]

DP and I are doing the deed a lot more regularly at the moment because we are ttc. This is usually in the evening when we first get into bed.

DP has a habit of going to the loo for several minutes before he joins me. I told him I find this off putting and unhygienic and asked if he can wait until after or go earlier in the day.

He just doesn’t see the issue and how someone would find it off putting.

Do you think I’m being unreasonable or would this annoy you too? It just seems stupid timing when you know you are going to be intimate with someone. It’s not a one off, it’s most occasions.

Not sure why this made me laugh so much 😂

🤣

I would have said I'm not overly fussy, but having had a couple of partners who were even less so, I've become a lot pickier. There's nothing like body odour to bring on the ick while in bed.

Can you poo on demand… in advance???

Presuming hands are washed and area freshened up, it wouldn't put me off seggs, I wouldn't be having a go on the meat flute though, too close proximity post sh!t 🤣

Oh god the cat is wobbling on the bed I am laughing so much!
Rumpy puumpy! Bum gun !

In all seriousness, just delay the sex till the morning.

There can only be amazing sex if you are really wanting it...

Wait till after or go earlier in the day?
He needs a poo!
Christ.
You can not dictate when he goes for a (no.2) 🤣

Higher risk of a water infection if he doesn’t shower after having a poo?? Ffs, I’ve heard it all now….

I've just gone celibate

I would definitely have a word if there were noticeable odour issues, but it seems mad to tell someone when they can or can’t poo, especially if they’ve told you it helps them feel less bloated during sex. I would rather they were relaxed and not in pain.

@Justinegh toilet, shower then bed
Jeeze if he can’t make the effort now what’s he going to be like later on .

A bit of c*m is not the same as toilet water splash and shit, the three are the not the same!

Sorry 😂🤣 only way I could describe it

I don’t like the thought of no1 or no2 just before bed if we are planning to be intimate. I’d be worried about lingering smells and asking him to shower before he comes to bed. However when we were TTC I was so desperate to get pregnant, I’d have sucked up it and not said anything to avoid any rows and gotten it over with quickly.

You wash your bum at the sink?😬

I had a friend who once put her finger up her bfs bum hole and it came out with poo on it. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

iirc she came back and made a comment about the toilet bowl shape and how it was difficult to fit her hand or something and we were both “but why is your hand anywhere near the bowl…?”

then it transpired that she wiped back to front and it lead to a conversation about wiping. a customer came in the exact moment all 3 of us were demonstrating how we wiped and she just looked at us “…………..”

I’m normally very quiet, we just bonded all too quickly

Sex is messy, sex is smelly, sex is crude, sex is great.
I am stunned by people's attempts to turn it into a clinical, tidy activity.
How very very boring!
Just get stuck into it and glory in it's basicness!

I wasn't sneering. They just happen to be 3major hubs that most planes stop at ( with bum guns) If you go pretty much anywhere except Europe or America

The poster i replied to says she travels a lot

It's anonymous and online. Get a grip.

I am staggered at how overly fastidious so many mumsnetters are.

How on earth will they cope with babies with shitty nappies??

I am staggered at how overly fastidious so many mumsnetters are.

How on earth will they cope with babies with shitty nappies??

I am now quite worried about travelling to these places and being met with a bum gun. Are they actually in public toilets? I just know I would want to try it out and probably make a godawful mess - often look like I've wet myself just washing my hands!

Put a foot towel down, use a flannel and pat dry with your towel - you’ve seriously never had a quick ho’s bath to make sure everything is fresh down there? If I want my DH to go down on me, I’m not going to make him deal with the day’s mustiness. And if I’ve just had a poo and I think we’re having sex, I want to make sure I’m clean. But it doesn’t require a full shower - just a bidet or sink wash.

You sound surprised by that?

Is that not kind of par for the course if you stick your finger up someone’s arsehole?

Thats why I don’t do it 🤷‍♂️