Shitty message aimed at me in school WhatsApp group chat

[Dannii93]

I’ve been working today so my DH did the pick up.

I received a notification that I’d been tagged in the school Mum’s WhatsApp group. For transparency, I’ve copied it here:

“@(me) and @(another Mum) if your husbands want to comment on Miss X’s TITS then I suggest they do so when other parents are not in earshot!!!”

The other Mum saw this before I did and replied to say she had no idea what she is on about but would have appreciated a message privately.

The reply:

“I think you need to reflect on what type of men you have settled for as they are disgusting!”

Anyway, I sent on to DH to ask what on earth happened. He said a Dad he was stood waiting with asked him if he had seen our DS’s new teacher. DH said no as he didn’t do the morning drop off. The Dad basically replied something along the lines of you’ll be in for a treat as she has massive tits and before DH could reply, a Mum who overheard (not the one who sent the messages above) snapped at him to shut up.

AIBU to find the Mum completely out of order to have sent those messages? She has an absolute cheek to say what she has about me needing to ‘reflect’ and it’s rich coming from someone who is a single bloody Mum herself!

and MN hates men

that old trope, that gets men off actually ever listening to a woman's POV.

Change the record.

What a lot of us hate is misogyny.

This poster has gone too far and jumped guns and sharks a little too soon. The poster will
learn and do better next time.

@Dannii93 what was the point of this? - he’s often on business internationally with his position at a FTSE 100 firm

You just made yourself sound even more smug.

I'd reply
You need to reflect on why you are holding women responsible for the actions of men.

It’s 50:50

You are both being unreasonable.
Why are you looking down on someone for being a single Mum? What’s wrong with you?
And she should have messaged your husbands not you. But I’m guessing she thought she’d get them in “Trouble“ telling you both.
She’s perfectly reasonable to get annoyed with what was said though.

Agreed

If (and only if) you are absolutely sure of the facts, I would find it hard not to reply with something like "It certainly sounds as if someone made a highly inappropriate comment, but it was not me and my DH says it was not him. When I want advice from you on how to choose a good partner, I’ll let you know. Perhaps you’d like to 'reflect' on that!"

What is the relevance of the FTSE 100 comment? I have a senior position at a FTSE 100 company as do probably loads of other mumsnetters. Not sure how that links to the rest of your story.

You’ll find it’s very far from an uncommon opinion about MN.

No one here know the OP’s husband in the slightest.

If someone slagged me off to my kids WhatsApp class in error, I’d be venting whatever shitty things I could about them to my spouse too.

😂😂😂😂

Oh FGS, MN doesn't hate men! I've been on here for over 20 years and all MN does is call out men's shitty behaviour. If that means MN hates men I'd suggest you may need to look at your low standards.

Hilarious 😆😆😆👏👏👏

Thanks for your opinion? I have mine too. And my standards are sky high.

You’re not coming across well at all. You sound extremely smug and unpleasant. Honestly you should reflect a bit.

I was divorced at 25, mainly because I don’t put up with bullshit. I rather be a single mother than be with a pervert. The amount of married woman I see and their husbands are creeping on woman on social media and following onlyfans accounts is disgusting. I really do pity them.

It also sounds very convenient that your husband was an innocent bystander. I highly doubt the other mother would embarrass herself in a group chat if it wasn’t the two of them making inappropriate comments.

Are the dads not on the WhatsApp group?
This is on them, not you.

I'm not buying your husbands story. Maybe you should add his number to the group and let him deal with it.

She'll be telling us the value of their house next.

He might have A Very Important Job but he still sounds like a misogynist.

I’m glad you realise your single mum comment was uncalled for. Has it never occurred to you that a lot of women end up as single mothers because they have been badly let down by the person who was supposed to be on their side?

And you probably see single dads as heroes.

I hate misogyny, but also misandry. There’s no shortage of the latter on here.

Dead 😂

She says one thing, your DH says another and you weren’t there. Both fathers now know Big Brother Mother is operating in the school vicinity. Don’t get involved. Ignore the WhatsApp message.

I wouldn’t disagree with you, except on here very few people seem to be able to add perspective or depth to any scenario involving a man. It’s 99% a done and dusted, blanket judgement, and at the end of the day on an individual that is a stranger to them.

This is gold!

May I be the first to recommend this goes to classics?!

It can be known as the “FTSE100 twat” thread!!