Willies on the beach

[YoureNotTheOnlyCuddlyToy]

Today it was a group of mum friends and kids on the beach. My DS age 5 took off his shorts and underwear to put on his swim shorts and was (as usual) in no particular rush, and a mum friend said “ooh Billy put on your shorts quickly”. I didn’t think much of it.

Later, at home time, her own son who is 10 was changing and got distracted so was talking to the other kids whilst naked. She said rather sternly something along the lines of “Tommy no, you’re a big boy, you can’t be doing that, you need to get your pants on”.
I hadn’t thought anything of it but she clearly had an issue.

My DS 5 is my eldest, so this is a new territory for me, and I was wondering at what age it becomes ‘wrong’ (inappropriate?) for being nudey on the beach? I thought it was fine and innocent today and she was being a bit weird, but thinking about it I suppose there must be cut off point or we’d have all the blokes peacocking around with their peacocks out.

I’ll do a poll but I’m more curious than opinionated about the matter.

YABU - a ten year old should not have his bits out and should change quickly
YANBU - it’s all fine, he’s a kid and didn’t have it out all day

Ten year old should definitely be changing from trunks to covering genitals quickly. Don‘T really care about rest of body - so into shorts or similar would be fine.

5 year old, meh.

I’m English.

Age 5, just about ok but my 5 year old would probably have wanted to be covered ASAP - they do the pants talk in reception of not before. Age 10, not really ok to be honest.

You are on MN.

Some poster accused a little boy to be a dangerous sex predator because he was showing his batman pants to a girl. Some posters on here have serious issues!

This is a bit of a vague answer but with these type of things it tends to become obvious and sort of work itself out naturally or the child doesn’t want to. I think 5 is fine, personally, but there’s no one answer. Helpful? 😁

Age 5, just about ok but at the upper range. Age 10 definitely not ok.

10 is getting a bit big to have willy out. It’s ok at 5.

Most tend to just make the transition naturally but I would say around age 7 max.

Both fine

I imagine it’s quite a personal thing, but I’ve taught DS from the start we don’t get naked in front of other people - I’ve never changed him in public and if he needs to pop into swim shorts etc I’ll take him to the loos on our way to the beach. No panicking about accidental slips/shorts falling down etc, it’s just something we avoid. I don’t think I even changed him as a baby in public!

5 is fine. Anyone who objects is IMO a prude.
By 10 TBH I’d have thought most kids who don’t have SN wouldn’t want to be flashing their bits anyway.

5 is OK but not 10 imho.

Some children naturally are more shy about their bodies. Others are not. There’s no set rule in my opinion. As they approach puberty and changed start to happen they are much less likely to wander around naked.

I think a 10 year old's willy casually out at the beach is a bit too much. A 5 year old getting changed, fine, but wouldn't want him running around naked on the beach either.

I think both are fine, no issue. But I'm in Germany so probably different if you're in the Uk!

I am honestly not being goady, but how will he manage in changing rooms at school and in rooms during residentials?

I think it’s fine 🤷🏼‍♀️

This is fascinating.

What about at home amongst extended family (grandparents, uncles and aunts)? Is ten too old to have bits showing for example on way too and from a shower?

I've done exactly the same as this rather than try and find a cut off of when it's okay/not I've always just found it easier to keep everything private, plus then knows only certain people can help you change and see you like that. I've always thought if I wouldn't want to do it I wont put them in that situation, yes been a hassle sometimes but always managed fine Xxx

I would say yes too old. Matters less in front a cousin same sex and similar age getting changed together, but no i would want to see nephew’s willy on way shower.

I think a lot of 10 year old boys would rather die than walk naked in front of their extended family!

I think both are fine in the context of changing. My 6 year old would happily run around naked on the beach, my 9 year old would make an attempt at changing quickly/under a towel, as he doesn’t like people seeing his willy. At home we all walk round naked, no issues.

I don’t see the issue with 2 children getting changed into their trunks. I think all children get to an age where they are naturally more discreet.

Does the ten year old have additional needs? This is quite a weird post. Kids just get changed and obviously you remind them to not be naked because in society we wear clothes to be safe. I wouldnt let any kid parade naked.

Bit weird you find this fascinating. 😳There’s no ‘cut off’ you just know how mentally aware/able they are.