Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH stole from me

303 replies

Odonje · 27/08/2025 17:18

At the weekend DH and I went to Knaresborough for a day out - famous for its sausage rolls and pork pies. I don’t like pork pies so I was very much looking forward to the lovely sausage rolls we bought in the bakery. It wasn’t a sausage roll, it was a bean roll but these are just as famous and they looked delicious. DH gobbled his up immediately whereas I took mine home to eat later in comfort of my own home.

later that evening, I wanted to try it but didn’t want the whole thing so I ripped a bit off the end to eat and kept the rest wrapped up in the fridge ready to eat today. I was very much looking forward to it. At lunch time I put my soup on and went to get the sausage roll - it wasn’t there. I messaged DH and he didn’t reply (coward) so I called his work place who went to find him. He denied it at first but eventually admitted to running off with it this morning. I’m gutted. I know it’s a small thing and it’s just a sausage roll but it’s the disrespect, the lies, the outright disregard for my feelings. Latest in a long line of events. Icing on the cake.

I have told him he has no moral compass and the bastard has gone to look up moral compass on yahoo to prove that it’s not a thing. I want it replaced. At the very least I want an apology. AIBU to refuse to cook him dinner or make him coffee until he apologises and promises to replace it.

OP posts:
KrisAkabusi · 27/08/2025 17:35

You phoned his work over a bean roll? You couldn't wait to have a conversation when he got home? You're psychotic.

Swiftie1878 · 27/08/2025 17:36

It’s not about the bean roll, is it?

Digdongdoo · 27/08/2025 17:37

You can't ring his work over a 3 day old bean roll! If you wanted it so badly you would have eaten it before now. Would be fair game by now in my house or there's a danger it would end up in the bin!
I'm assuming there's backstory, otherwise what an overreaction.

Coldnightsapproachingwhereismyduvet · 27/08/2025 17:39

My exh used to eat my vegi stuff knowing his dead products were safe.
Exh..
Just saying..

PamIsAVolleyballChamp · 27/08/2025 17:40

Am assuming we're doing a collective logging of 101?

BananaBreadWithCustard · 27/08/2025 17:41

I can’t believe you phoned his workplace over a sausage roll 😂 😂 😂

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 27/08/2025 17:41

Knaresborough, is that where mother Upton (think that's what her name was) lived in a cave? And where that mineral well thing is that concretes everything?

BananaBreadWithCustard · 27/08/2025 17:41

PamIsAVolleyballChamp · 27/08/2025 17:40

Am assuming we're doing a collective logging of 101?

On it.

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 27/08/2025 17:42

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 27/08/2025 17:41

Knaresborough, is that where mother Upton (think that's what her name was) lived in a cave? And where that mineral well thing is that concretes everything?

Apologies for digressing 🙁

whitewineandsun · 27/08/2025 17:43

I can't believe you called his work over a sausage roll. That's a massive overreaction.

lcakethereforeIam · 27/08/2025 17:44

Mother Shipton. Lacking a patio her cave could come in handy.

5foot5 · 27/08/2025 17:44

Ivenoname · 27/08/2025 17:31

There's been quite a few threads on MN along these lines of the guy hoovering up all the food in the house that particularly belongs to other other family members. The one that sticks in my mind is the selfish greedy father who ate all his DC s Easter eggs so that when the OP went to give them to the children on Easter morning they were gone.

And it literally always is the guy who does it.

And it's not funny in the slightest. It's selfish, nasty, greedy entitled behaviour.

I think OP has every right to be annoyed because it shows that in the scheme of things her H assumes his pleasure is what matters and her's doesn't count for very much.

I immediately thought of the Dad and the Easter Eggs when I read this.

Selfish bastard!

It is annoying because the person with restraint, who doesn't just gobble up the tasty thing immediately but saves it to enjoy at a later time, is penalised by the greedy guts who puts their gratification above everyone else.

Particularly bad when it affects children as it might encourage binge eating, i.e. if I don't eat it immediately someone else might.

Mewling · 27/08/2025 17:44

Listen, I have a disproportionate love of sausage rolls but I think this sounds a bit much. What’s he really done that you hate him so much?

TitaniasAss · 27/08/2025 17:45

I'm appalled. No court in the land would convict you if ...

BotterMon · 27/08/2025 17:46

Stole from you? You called his work and got them to go find him? You sound a bit batshit tbh however if he has form for being a liar and a git then just LTB.

And it wasn't even a real sausage roll.

PotatoPrometheus · 27/08/2025 17:46

It’s a small thing but you care about it…and he didn’t recognise that, which says to me that’s it’s maybe a bigger problem than just a sausage roll.

5foot5 · 27/08/2025 17:47

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 27/08/2025 17:41

Knaresborough, is that where mother Upton (think that's what her name was) lived in a cave? And where that mineral well thing is that concretes everything?

My friend went to Luxembourg and said it was just like Knaresborough. I don't know. I haven't been to Luxembourg but I have been to Knaresborough. I didn't have a sausage roll though. Or a bean one.

Anotherparkingthread · 27/08/2025 17:49

I couldn't be with somebody like this. The lack of self control I would find absolutely revolting. What a pig.

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 27/08/2025 17:49

I have voted YABU, with the understanding that sometimes being unreasonable is the only possible way to deal with this sort of behaviour, and I applaud unreasonableness in the right place at the right time.

silkypyjamas · 27/08/2025 17:49

My ex cooked my bacon sarnie after a long day of me looking forward to a nice crispy bacon sarnie and he gave it to me... wait for it..... with the crispy rind missing!!!! 😱😱😱 yes, you guessed it, he ate it!!!! THE BEST BIT!!!! needless to say he's my ex. I hear you OP, food theft it the worst LTB.

TomatoSandwiches · 27/08/2025 17:50

Another example of male entitlement, they always take from women, doesn't matter what it is but food seems silly and aomwthing you can't moan about but it is, it's indicative of how he sees you and your relationship.... no respect.

SpidersAreShitheads · 27/08/2025 17:51

I think as it was a bean roll he's actually done you a favour.

Had it been an actual sausage roll or even - gasp! - chocolate, then I think you would have been fully justified in starting to dig up the patio.

I hope you told his boss (leaving out the bean part, obviously). The bastard deserves to be outed.

Doseofreality · 27/08/2025 17:52

If any of this story is true, I hope he took the roll to give to “the other woman”.

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 27/08/2025 17:52

If you had really wanted it, you would have eaten it when purchased

but

it wasn't a sausage roll so you were compromising anyway, hence the not even eating it at home later that day.

famous you say for sausage rolls and pork pies
then you decide after saying that
it's also famous for bean rolls

thus you could have edited it to say ' famous for pork pies, sausage rolls and bean rolls '

I am sure this is a wind up

or there is more to all this...

noidea69 · 27/08/2025 17:53

Ringing his work over a sausage roll is mental.