Asked friend to dog sit and she said 'it was a bit inconvenient'

[Terracottafarmers]

I've asked my good friend, who’s really good with our dog, if she’d be able to look after her while we’re away for a couple of nights in December. Normally I’d ask my parents, but since they’ll be away with us, we don’t have anyone else to help.

When I asked her, she said she’d let me know, but this is already the second time I’ve had to bring it up (even though she’s looked after our dog a handful of times before). This time she made a comment I found a bit odd 'Well, you haven’t chosen dates Diana that are exactly easy'. .

I just find the comment a little strange, you either can or you can’t. To be honest, it’s made me feel like I’m being a bit of an inconvenience even asking her. The only thing is, I know if I go back and say we’ve found someone else, she’ll probably get annoyed that we chose another option.

AIBU to feel a bit taken aback?

December is a busy month, dogs are tying. She probably doesn’t want to commit to this and risk missing out on a fun Christmas event that comes up later. I don’t blame her really.
i’d be finding another dog sitter or a nice kennels, she obviously isn’t keen and you’ll be a nuisance if you ask again.

A couple of nights in December, is not a set date.
She doesn't want to do it.
You need to hire someone. I wouldn't want to do it either, it is an inconvenience.

To be honest, it’s made me feel like I’m being a bit of an inconvenience even asking her.

Well yes! You seem to think that you're doing her a favour by letting her greatly inconvenience herself 🤔

Why have you edited your opening post?

How do you know she doesn’t have other plans it is December after all and I know a most weekends in December in my house are taken up with Christmas prep,work Xmas parties,family gatherings.

your asking someone to have your dog and stay at your house for one of the only three weekends before Xmas.

mid say that’s why it’s inconvenient for her.

pay a dog sitter or put the dog into kennels.

To try and make themselves look less of a Cheeky Fucker

Pay for a dog sitter.

It is unfair, and frankly entitled, to just to expect a friend to look after your dog and you should accept that she is obviously not keen to do it.

She does not want to do it. It's December, a really busy month for a lot of people. It sounds like she isn't comfortable saying no but is making it clear it's not convenient. I think you're quite cheeky to be offended by this, you should take the hint and make other arrangements.

This! One of my pals does occasional live in dog sitting, but he's cutting it right back because he doesn't like staying in other people's homes.

Partly its the inconvenience of being away from home but mostly it's that he's found other people's standards of home hygiene and comfort don't align with his - filthy kitchen or bathroom, piles of dirty clothes left unwashed, that kind of thing.

Do you pay for her to help you out? It's a big ask. Alternatively, maybe your house is really unpleasant to stay in.

I think the issue is that OP has problem with her friend saying she can't/doesn't want to do it. That is obviously her choice and right. What OP doesn't like is this pussyfooting about 'I'll let you know' and hint dropping. The friend just needs to say no now so that OP can make alternative plans.

OP check out Rover. We found our wonderful dog sitter on there. We don't let our doggo stay with just anyone neither and wouldn't entertain the idea of kennels for him, but we now consider this lady as a friend and our dog loves going to her house.

You are not doing her a favour. She does not want to do it. Friendship does not revolve around entitlement to somebody's time. Pay a dog sitter.

She needs to give a clear answer.

Yes, payment has been offered. It's in the original post but has been edited out.

'She’s starting uni on Wednesdays and Thursdays, but since we’re going away Friday to Monday, it really shouldn’t affect her.
I just find the comment a little strange, you either can or you can’t. To be honest, it’s made me feel like I’m being a bit of an inconvenience even asking her. We’ve offered to pay her, and she’d be staying at our place, which could be a nice change for her since she still lives at home. I told her that if she can’t do it, just let me know and I’ll find someone else who can.'

Stop taking advantage of your friend.

My friend used to just ask and without an excuse we couldn't say no, but HATED it. Last time it was in December, just after Christmas. We saw a good deal & though we'd go away... Oh, can't, were looking after someone's pets. So they had a lovely holiday while we were stuck at home. Once they asked & we actually were going away. I was relieved.

Just get a pet sitter.

those points are the most important. OP offered to pay, and the sitter is at uni now part of the week, and lives at home.

So even though OP would pay, sitter doesn't want to.

Why be offended? If you have money to pay a sitter then just have someone who isn't a friend. Much easier.

The OP edited the OP, the original is

I've asked my good friend, who’s really good with our dog, if she’d be able to look after her while we’re away for a couple of nights in December. Normally I’d ask my parents, but since they’ll be away with us, we don’t have anyone else to help.
When I asked her, she said she’d let me know, but this is already the second time I’ve had to bring it up (even though she’s looked after our dog a handful of times before). This time she made a comment I found a bit odd 'Well, you haven’t chosen dates Diana that are exactly easy'.
She’s starting uni on Wednesdays and Thursdays, but since we’re going away Friday to Monday, it really shouldn’t affect her.
I just find the comment a little strange, you either can or you can’t. To be honest, it’s made me feel like I’m being a bit of an inconvenience even asking her. We’ve offered to pay her, and she’d be staying at our place, which could be a nice change for her since she still lives at home. I told her that if she can’t do it, just let me know and I’ll find someone else who can.
The only thing is, I know if I go back and say we’ve found someone else, she’ll probably get annoyed that we chose another option.*
AIBU to feel a bit taken aback?

The OP makes it much clearer how much of a piss take of the friend this arrangement is

I think you are taking advantage of your friend, but she's too afraid to tell you no - and is probably just hoping you'll make other arrangements. December is often a busy time for people, so I think you are being unreasonable

Same thing. Then I noticed 'Edited' 😂

December is full of fun nights out or kids' shows. Of course it's hard to commit to being shackled to a fucking animal.

Anyway OP, I think you know YABVU. Pay a professional like a normal person.

I second rover for dog sitters, the app is brilliant for communication and updates.
It tracks dog walks too.

Perhaps you are an ask culture person while she is a guess culture person (this has nothing to do with your nationality or ethnicity). You feel that you can ask anything and she can say yes or no as she pleases. She feels obliged to say yes so expects you to first guess whether she wants to do it and only ask if she can say yes.

YABU find a dog sitter!

Take a hint. Yes it's an inconvenience. You shouldn't have asked her a second time. Read the room, get a professional dog sitter and apologise for being tone deaf and presumptious if you want to have any chance of saving this friendship from it's demise.

How can she agree when she doesn't know the date?

Can't you just clarify "Appreciate it is near Christmas, does this mean youre unavailable? No worries if you are ill ask someone else" surely that would cover it? She obviously means no but feels guilty