To call out a man for barging into me?

[Giraffe007]

Walking in to a supermarket, wide entrance, plenty of room, a man clearly in a hurry, walking fast, barged into me, knocking my shoulder hard.

Was I being unreasonable to shout after him "what's the problem? Entrance not wide enough for you? I was with my teenage son, who was mortified, not a the man's rudeness, but at me calling him out for it. BTW, the man ignored me, but a a middle aged woman, I'm used to being ignored.

I thought it was just me that men barged into all the time. It does seem to happen a lot, they just seem to expect you to move out the way or get knocked.

is this the first time you have been barged by someone?

when was the last time you took the tube?! 😆

I doubt he even knew it was you he was shouting after if he didn’t turn around

he was rude, but not sure I’d have shouted that afterwards as people would just turn to look… at you

You were right to call him out on it. Well done you for doing so.

There is a difference between being on a crowded Tube/Underground station and in an entrance way with plenty of space though. So I should just humbly accept being barged into? No thank you. And so what if people turn to look at me? Then they will also be looking at him too.

He was rude twat

You shouted at him. He ignored you, may well have not even realised it was him you were shouting at.

People would have looked at you not knowing what had happened and probably thought “bit lairy!” And your son was mortified.

So my point is… I’m all for calling out. When it will achieve something. Anything.

They’d only have known why you were shouting at him if they’d seen him knock into you

You were right to call him out but what you actually said was rude and really passive aggressive.

I read/saw a thing about how women are primed to move out the way of men just keep walking, I wasn’t sure that was true to I tested it and by just being more aware and if I was walking in the same line as an oncoming man I stopped automatically stepping aside and they did collide with me. I was really surprised. They all seemed like perfectly pleasant men as well, and looked genuinely perplexed by how we had come to walk into each other, so maybe there is something in it.

Good for you. We need to call out such rude behaviour. I would have been knocked over by a barge like that.

It sounds like you were hurt if he knocked your shoulder hard? That's what I would have said.

I admire your restraint. I would’ve shouted something far less polite. I’m more shocked however, at your teenage son upholding the partriachal norms that women should know their place. Maybe he needs a stern word too.

Yeah, she was the fucking rude one!

Oh don’t be daft

He’s a teen boy. He will be existing within an almost permanent state of embarrassment!

Yes I’ve heard of this and told Dh who thought it was nonsense until I proved it to him by walking in a straight line while not moving out of men’s path.
He soon wanted me to “behave normally” when I was inevitably colliding left right and centre with these poor confused men.

Who fucking cares?!

He was a rude, actually aggressive dick!

Shout it out sister ... don't tolerate it.

Its the only fucking way.
Is she supposed to be polite about it??
That's why women are walked over and ignored.... don't contribute to it.,

I am a woman

Chances are I wouldn’t have seen the barging but instead a woman shouting “what is your problem?” And thought that either she’s having a beef with someone in the parking lot or the security guard has told her to leave!

I’d have added ‘twat’ or ‘wanker’ onto the end personally. Then there’s nothing ‘passive’ about it. Not that there was anything wrong with what the OP said in the first place.

Get a better phrase, people are apparently inclined to think you are the issue judging by this thread.

Look where you’re going!
Ow! That hurt!

I’m very sorry to say its a ‘trend’ started by women hating unloved small dick men in Japan. There’s another thread about it on here somewhere, but I can’t find it.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-14687701/amp/women-london-butsukari-otoko-shove-japan.html

https://thenewfeminist.co.uk/2025/05/what-is-butsukari-women-are-speaking-out-about-being-shoved-by-strangers/?amp=1

Another replied with similar scepticism: “A man bumped into me in Sainsbury’s yesterday. I didn’t stop to ask if he was an incel, so I can’t claim to be a victim of this ‘worrying trend’.”

Here lies the crux of the issue: plausible deniability.

Butsukari thrives in the grey area between evidence and interpretation, where the moment is too fast, too casual, and too easy to dismiss.

While these men are technically right – not every bump is butsukari – the refusal to believe anymight be reveals something deeper. That hesitation, that instinct to doubt until met with incontrovertible proof, is itself part of the violence.

It shifts the burden of clarity onto those most destabilised by the act, reinforcing the notion that unless a woman is bruised, broken, or bleeding, she must be exaggerating.

‘So, the next time a woman says she was pushed or slammed on purpose, believe her.

Don’t ask if she’s sure. Call it butsukari. Add it to the growing ledger of public violence against women.

Because once we name it, we can confront it. And perhaps, in time, we can stop it.’

I don’t automatically believe or disbelieve anyone on the basis of their sex

Why?
Do you always judge women negatively?