When I said I was going to get a glass of wine - one of them even said “well you would!””. They’re all lovely but aibu to think the venues are struggling and you just can’t do this
Well they’re not all lovely. One of them is a right snidey mare and the three who aren’t buying drinks either have some serious nerve or are lacking in basic social skills. Would they go to a nice restaurant, get seated and then decline menus because they only wanted somewhere nice to sit while they had a chat with their friends? Of course they wouldn’t. The only difference in this scenario is that they don’t have to come face to face with a waiter. And that’s only going to last for so long because the bar staff are not blind idiots and definitely will have noticed. Sooner or later, the landlord is going to be wandering over for a chat.
It would have been good if you’d said at the time ‘yes, because we’re sitting in a place that requires us to at least buy a cup of tea if we’re going to be using their facilities’.
I think I’d message them all and say that you’ve realised that the pub isn’t the most suitable place for you all to meet, as it means there’s an implied cost to attending, and does anyone have any other suggestions along the line of your previous venue. If they all reply saying that the pub is fine with them, then respond that, sadly, it’s not fine with the landlord, as there's an expectation that you all buy at least one drink if you’re intending on taking up a table.
If you’re not direct enough to do that, then the only other thing I can think of is to be a bit passive aggressive about it and buy a round of six cups of tea or soft drinks etc, without asking if they want one. And if they protest, say that you don’t care whether or not they actually drink it, but you can’t sit in a pub without buying a drink and a couple of cups of tea in a pub is cheaper than dividing the cost of hiring a community centre between the six of you.