Would you take your ex in, if the only other option was being homeless

[Donotpanicoknowpanic]

If you have an ex that left you but they then fell on hard times and literally the only option was to sleep at yours or they sleep in their car (realistically this would be reasonably long term)

Would you let them sleep at yours until they are back on their feet

(The council were contacted and no realistic opinions were provided)

The ex was really nasty during the divorce, saying lies all over social media, argued with all of your family and has also been quite nasty since the divorce

Though if nothing is expected of them (such as helping to tidy up), will be quite and enjoys spending time with the kids

Still nope. You'll never get rid of her if you do. Let her sort herself out.

I would only let him in the house would be for visits with the kids. So I knew he was with them somewhere warm and clean if whether prevented him taking them to the park or something outdoors

Nasty? Liar? You dont want him sharing your home again. You'll have all the draw backs of being his wife with less perks

Sorry if this has already been said, I haven’t read every single post, just all the OPs and some others.
Streets or car will not be the only option. If she has no other options (she can’t tell them she has an option of staying with you) once she is actually homeless, so the day she is evicted from her current place, she needs to go to the council offices and tell them. They will try and suggest any other option of family etc, but once she tells them that isn’t an option, once they close for the day they will then put her up in a B&B. They have to, it is law. They will try everything first though not to, so most likely she will have to wait there until they are closing up for the day

Nope, nope,noppity nope!

How come so many are still getting the basic facts wrong, even though it's been pointed out by numerous MNers.

OP - Male
EX - Female

You can't take her in, it would be a disaster and from the sounds of it detrimental for the children. You could, if you are feeling kind, offer to keep some of her belongings safe for her, if she had concerns about them in an HMO.

I understand it must be hard to see someone, you obviously once cared about a lot, in such a difficult situation. Ultimately it is not your responsibility though.

Absolutely not.

NO

My sentiments exactly

You said your kids are better behaved without her - I was going to suggest you say ‘no’ and now you’ve said that. i’d definitely say no. She’s not your responsibity @Donotpanicoknowpanic

No.

Not just NO… but Fuck No.

Ah well. I just wanted to illustrate that it doesn’t have to involve having an ex living in your house every weekend. That would be bloody awful.

Absolutely not. The fact that he has no one else to stay with is telling.

The council has given ‘no realistic options’ as in they’ve offered something, a bed sit further away? Not your problem.

This happened to me. My ex walked out. Left me homeless, turned really nasty. Took my kids and tried to turn them against me spouting all sorts of lies etc. I DID sleep in my car for a few weeks, Would I help him out now. Hell would need to freeze over first!! Karma can be a bitch 😀

People have to learn there are consequences for their actions. My ex DP dumped me after 20 years for a new woman and lifestyle. 6 months later none of this worked out and he was desperate to come home to my very comfortable house and lifestyle when he found himself jobless and living in a grotty bedsit.
I said no, he had turned my life upside down and caused huge heartbreak. I was not about to take him back under any circumstances. He's still hanging around trying to come back 5 years later but Im having none of it. My life is much calmer and less stressful now.
You don't owe her anything. She knew what she was doing.

She never said he cheated

Tbh people can be horrible lots of times if stressed or guilty and it's more important if he's horrible to the kids or horrible now to you.
If you are a kind person don't stop being yourself just cos everyone says no way. You do you, but with appropriate thoughts and protection in place.
For example don't let him move in. Allow him to have a shower, shave and laundry and a decent cooked meal once or twice a week.
Get him to look for live in positions (hospitality and house sitting), give him a reference if needed, help him but don't put your life back on hold.
Let me repeat Do Not Let Him Move In

Makes no difference except I would have used different pronouns on my answer

Female is a bit more at risk of rape etc in her car, that’s the main difference.
do the kids live with you?

No. The behaviours that led to them being an ex are unlikely to have gone away. The situation may or may not be of their own making but it is not your problem now.

She is not your responsibility. You are divorced. Focus on yourself and your children. She is a adult and has made her life choices.

No chance. Nasty to you during and since the divorce … now needs help!!?!
Probably never get rid of him either.

Well we can’t all be rude!

My answer stays the same if vice versa.

The ex is a she, not he.