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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Air BnB - would we get turned away for bringing an extra person?

209 replies

Jahavagayxn · 15/08/2025 15:33

Okay, I am prepared to be told AIBU

the situation is group of 7 of us, 3 couples and myself (single when it was booked) booked an Airbnb for a weekend away. We are all close friends

we booked an Airbnb that has space for 7 people - 3 doubles, one single bed.

between the time of booking and now, I have started a relationship with someone and I would really like him to come. however, this obviously throws up an issue in the max capacity of the air BnB is already reached so it's not like we can just add one more person in

he's very chill, I know he'd be fine sleeping on the sofa or squeezing in the single with me. If we ask the air BnB host if we can do that I imagine they will say no though, even if we offer to pay more for the extra person?

or is it super cheeky to just all 8 of us show up and hope they don't notice?

or do I just accept he can't come? I know it's not the end of the world but I'd really love him to come, I don't want to be 7th wheel (again!) and these are my closest friends, due to living all over the country we rarely get all together for a whole weekend, so I'd like them to meet him.

OP posts:
Theoldboots · 15/08/2025 15:35

Personally I wouldn't risk it, I'd ask and abide by what the owner says.

murasaki · 15/08/2025 15:35

You could ask the air bnb host, but it would be super cheeky to sneak him in. And they may have a ring doorbell...

I'd be furious if I were a host and found out.

murasaki · 15/08/2025 15:36

You could split the cost with him of somewhere near and see him with the group that way.

adlitem · 15/08/2025 15:36

Let them know and offer to pay for the additional person. Lots of people have CCTV and it's pretty likely they'd find out one way or another.

Othersnotsomuch · 15/08/2025 15:39

Just ask fgs op

IMissSparkling · 15/08/2025 15:40

Erm, have you asked your friends if they want a guy don't know crashing their holiday?! I would not be happy at all.

Othersnotsomuch · 15/08/2025 15:40

What do the 6 others think op?

Arlanymor · 15/08/2025 15:40

It's their property you have to ask them, it's courtesy and the right thing to do. If it is against the rules and you sneak him in then you would both just feel jumpy the whole time - what if they have CCTV, a ring door bell? If it's not possible can't he just find somewhere nearby to stay and just come and go? He can leave late and come over early. Presuming your friend group are also fine to have him come along too? I say the latter because one of my friendship groups has a friend who changes blokes like library books and we're tired of investing our time, energy and friendship in someone who will shortly be replaced. Six months and above then we're fine - you've only know him for two weeks? Nope!

Michele09 · 15/08/2025 15:41

The problem for the owner may be the insurance is only for a certain occupancy level.

boredwfh · 15/08/2025 15:41

It’s also insurance implications for the host. You’d be invalidating the insurance with overcrowding

Original poster
Jahavagayxn · 15/08/2025 15:42

IMissSparkling · 15/08/2025 15:40

Erm, have you asked your friends if they want a guy don't know crashing their holiday?! I would not be happy at all.

You wouldn't be happy if your best friend bought their partner to a trip you are also bringing your partner to? That's a bit odd

OP posts:
Shatteredallthetimelately · 15/08/2025 15:42

between the time of booking and now, I have started a relationship with someone

I don't want to be 7th wheel (again!)

Yet you booked it before you were in a relationship, so would have knowingly been the 7th wheel anyway.

XelaM · 15/08/2025 15:43

Can he book a cheap room nearby and then you can all hang out together?

Original poster
Jahavagayxn · 15/08/2025 15:45

Shatteredallthetimelately · 15/08/2025 15:42

between the time of booking and now, I have started a relationship with someone

I don't want to be 7th wheel (again!)

Yet you booked it before you were in a relationship, so would have knowingly been the 7th wheel anyway.

Yep, I did! I wanted to, and still do, spend time with my friends whether im the single one or not. But now that I'm not single it would be more comfortable for me not being the only one there without their partner. Obviously if that can't happen I'll still go, it wasn't then, and isn't now a dealbreaker.

OP posts:
Othersnotsomuch · 15/08/2025 15:45

How long have you been with him?
do others know him?
are they happy for him to join?
what do they think about asking the owner?

Othersnotsomuch · 15/08/2025 15:45

Jahavagayxn · 15/08/2025 15:42

You wouldn't be happy if your best friend bought their partner to a trip you are also bringing your partner to? That's a bit odd

Show quote history

So…. Have you asked them?

Original poster
Jahavagayxn · 15/08/2025 15:46

XelaM · 15/08/2025 15:43

Can he book a cheap room nearby and then you can all hang out together?

This is a good idea, but I'm not sure if it would be an issue us all hanging out at the Airbnb even if not all staying there?

OP posts:
Darragon · 15/08/2025 15:46

Jahavagayxn · 15/08/2025 15:42

You wouldn't be happy if your best friend bought their partner to a trip you are also bringing your partner to? That's a bit odd

Show quote history

Oh dear God. You're that person who brings an extra person to things without asking. YABVU.

BridgetofKildare · 15/08/2025 15:46

Where is the property? If it is in an area with licencing it will only be for seven people with those beds. Overuse could invalidate licence and cause problems with local authorities, Air B&B and insurance.

Othersnotsomuch · 15/08/2025 15:47

Othersnotsomuch · 15/08/2025 15:45

How long have you been with him?
do others know him?
are they happy for him to join?
what do they think about asking the owner?

Simple questions really

Talkinpeace · 15/08/2025 15:48

Ask the host.
The airbnb near me sleeps 9 but they have cots and a folding bed so there were 12 the other week

FOJN · 15/08/2025 15:48

You should look at the terms and conditions. I think if you turn up with more guests than permitted/booked the host can refuse you entry to the property or ask you to leave.

I think if you decide you want your boyfriend to join you for the weekend you must ask the host to avoid any problems.

Original poster
Jahavagayxn · 15/08/2025 15:49

To answer the people who are asking what my friends think, I've spoken to 2 of them, and they would have no issue with me bringing my partner. They just have the same concerns I do, whether we would be allowed to or not.

I haven't spoken to the other one as she's very busy (the other 3 are partners so I wouldn't speak to them directly anyway)

I don't just show up to events with random people uninvited, but if a group of couples are doing something together I find it odd people would think one half of a couple can't come along just because they're new?

OP posts:
jen337 · 15/08/2025 15:53

Sneak him in! Hardy crime of the century is it. You lot sound like the types who’d pay for tasting a grape at the supermarket.

theresnolimits · 15/08/2025 15:53

Please don Do this without checking. You will invalidate their insurance. You also have no idea if their neighbours are watching like a hawk and will report them. Also, how comfortable will that be.

I would suggest you run it by the Airbnb owner. If they say no, look for a cheap B& B nearby, get a proper double bed and come and go. Much nicer for all concerned.