To think I’m not a nice person?

[He1h]

I CAN be nice but overall I don’t think I am. There are genuine sentiments I feels where I want to do the right thing or where I feel genuine empathy towards someone. Mainly family or close friends which I guess is normal.

But there’s so many things I hear about where I basically can’t understand how anyone could be bothered… examples…

Stepping on a snail or killing a spider in your home. I feel nothing, maybe a mild acknowledgment that it’s a bit cruel but a few seconds later I’m over it.

My friend’s family pet died when she was in her late twenties and she was devastated for around 3 weeks. I thought it was ridiculous (I didn’t say that obviously).

People getting bothered when they’re above the age of 18 and their birthday can’t be celebrated on that specific day.. who cares?!

Gender reveals… I literally could not give a fuck what gender your baby is, I do not want to have a ‘reveal’ because I am simply not interested.

When someone’s child is crying at a park of soft play because they want the toy my child has…I have zero compassion and just want said child to go away.

Whoever is about to cross the road and I could slow down and stop, I don’t, even if elderly. I simply don’t care.

If my toddler needs to use the disabled bathroom when we are out, and the baby changing is in there, I will actively rush past a wheelchair user on their way in (if I can manage it in a socially acceptable way). I don’t care that they may need it more than me/DD.

There’s lots more. I can be very kind and considerate but largely I think I’m mostly about myself/immediate family and couldn’t care less about anything else. I often think I will make up for this shitty behaviour later on in life. Then of course I don’t. How awful are these things? Am I just a bit shit?

You sound like a toxic narcissist.

Tbf to you op, I live near a very busy main road and it's rare that someone stops to let you cross so I dont know why everyone is so shocked by this. I guarantee they wont be stopping either 😂

Not for me to judge if you are a nice person or not. I am relieved I'm not friends with you though!

The pet one got me. What was it about your friend feeling so upset about it that annoyed you? Did you feel she just should have sucked it up and not shown how upset she was? It feels sad to me that you didn't want to try to imagine yourself in her shoes.

Me too. It's weird how some posters are saying we all think like that. Nope.

You don’t sound very caring at all, but there’s definitely a reason behind it. I would seek therapy if I were you.

Well at least you are acknowledging you are selfish and entitled. Why not go one step further and change your ways. You don’t have to care necessarily, to do nice things and to be unselfish, just behave properly and may be you will start to care.

I wouldn’t say those things particularly make you a bad person, some are careless and a bit selfish! How are you with your family, are you empathetic to them?

How is your mental health? I’m only asking because if you felt stressed when DD needed the toilet you may of been overwhelmed and done the wrong thing. You sound a bit numb to the world, I hope you’re ok?

I'd love to see you try and rush past my disabled son to change your PFB. You'd get his wheelchair at your ankles.

Stepping on a snail or killing a spider, not everyone feels bad about these.

Your friend being upset, not sure if you just don't have the same feelings, value or experience of a family pet but you obviously care enough about the person or you would've said something.

If you're refering to letting people cross the road not at a traffic stop. Lots of people don't do this, I cross the road all the time as a pedestrian and more people don't stop than do.

Some other kid is crying because they want a toy your child has, sounds like they should learn to share. Obviously depending on age this might affect your response.

Yeah you probably shouldn't push in the queue for the toilet though

There are more of your posts that I relate to than don’t, and for the most part the people saying that you are awful and they fear for your children are sadly (ironically) lacking empathy.

Children cry, old people die. If you feel a 93 year old dying that you don’t know is incredibly sad then you are not wired correctly, a 33 year old is a different story. Children spoilt crying leaves me quite cold but if I saw a child have an unusual jolt that might be harmful I’d think about it for a long time and hope that they were okay.

I care about me and mine, sad stories upset me but I try and shake it off. Often the empathic are the ones who have to harden themselves to cope with the realities of life. My DH is moved by very little and he worries not a jot.

If I hear someone who has battled drugs has died on their tenth overdose I don’t feel the same way as I would if someone the same age was struck by lightning, I think they have probably hurt themselves and a lot of people and I worry that that makes me a harsh person.

People are very performative I feel, they have things they pretend to get upset about as they think it makes them look like a good person and there is a lot of that around at the moment. Especially in those who have lived softer lives. Virtue signalling is worse than not caring if a spoilt toddler can’t steal a toy at a sandpit.

NOOOOOOOOO 😱

You certainly don’t sound nice at all. But strange examples to give- I mean not caring about a gender reveal is most of us, I’d say- I’d even go further and say I abhor such nonsense. But potentially running someone over is very serious and also a crime that could end up with you in prison! You are apparently aware of what the ‘right thing to do’ is, even though you don’t ‘feel’ it. I suggest you try harder to do the right thing when you can, then maybe you can respect yourself a little more.

😂

I have a denim skirt and jacket combo.

You already know what you are, I don’t think you need validated by a bunch of strangers on the internet but here we are.

You’re not the kind of person I’d want to know.

If you care enough to change your name and/ or have ever worried you may be a sociopath/ psychopath- you aren't. Your choices are more selfish and self centred than any sort of pathology.

Law says you should

You sound like a bit of a self absorbed arsehole but you already knew that writing it out. Not sure what use anyone else’s judgement is if you manage not to give a shit what people think about you in any of these real life scenarios.

Watch Dexter on Netflix, you may find yourself

So you’d race past a disabled person, possibly causing them to soil themselves to change a baby who can presumably wait for the disabled person to use the bathroom?

She’s not a sociopath. Sociopaths don’t care.

I’m actually kinda P.O.’d that this post was so boring.

The examples show she’s just really pathetic and has nothing going on in her life.

I don't think you're being unreasonable, you genuinely seem to someone who is not very nice. However, I don't agree with some of the comments that you're"entitled"; if you were you probably would be asking the question. It would seem absolutely normal behaviour from your perspective. It's really interesting that you seem to know you're behaving badly and yet, from what I can gather from your replies, you appear to continue to behave in the same way! That's really bizarre and I dread to think how your child/children will turn out. On the other hand, given that you've identified some of these behaviours, why not try and do something about it? Over to you.

I don't agree with the whole post but I can relate to a few things OP has said.

I'm also completely comfortable with being a bitch and I don't care if people don't like me because there's little chance I like them anyway.

As a disabled person you sound like a 💩ty person beware of karma