To be embarrassed by DH in shop?

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NC’d just in case

DH and I popped into the only decent shop in our town this morning. I had asked him to pick up the bank card before we left and he said he would. We go into the shop, pick up what we need (6 items non food). Checkout and DH realises he’s forgotten the bank card. We didn’t bring phones or anything.

The man on the till (there are no self service tills) didn’t say anything but did look extremely put out/grumpy when we apologised for the inconvenience. He was silent and visibly annoyed and DH said ‘it was just an accident you know’. The man didn’t say anything, still looked annoyed, and DH said ‘so much for customer service’. When we started to walk away, he turned round and asked for the man’s name which he told him. Then DH walked away saying that he was a twat, loud enough for him to hear.

I was mortified. DH was annoyed that I was okay with ‘being treated poorly’ by someone for no good reason. The man was in his mid 60’s I’d say and working in what I assume is a sometimes physically challenging retail role and to be honest, his reaction didn’t bother me. I go into that shop about twice a week on average and now don’t want to go back. It’s not a big shop so if the man was working he’d definitely see me and most likely be on the till. AIBU to be annoyed by DH’s reaction?

Your DH should be banned from that shop for abusing the staff.

Exactly, there's enough to deal with, what with the rise in shop lifting and extra costs. It's a tough time in retail. It's just strange to have no means to pay between the pair of them?!

He probably has been. He would be where I work his photo would of been taken of the cameras and next time he walked in he would be issued with a ban

All a bit odd and dramatic. Two of you going out shopping with nothing but one singular shared bank card? Was it just supposed to be loose in a pocket?
Your DH sounds awful calling someone a twat for merely looking a bit irritated. And I hope you put the items back on the shelves...

Of course they didn't to busy arguing and having a tantrum and blaming everyone else.

I work in a large store on the till & it’s not a shit job. The pay isn’t wonderful but the job suits me & I have a lot of really lovely regulars. And we do get trained - I have to do a lot, even though some of it isn’t relevant to my position but could come in handy if I have to cover for colleagues for example.

I had that happen too in Waitrose. 10 minutes to closing on Friday of a bank holiday. Asked for it to be put in store. Manager saw trolley being wheeled away and told me to take it and pay next week.
They can see the regular customers by the Waitrose card I assume. I've told people that story and they haven't believed me. Glad to read of someone else beneffiting from their good service.

Are you Luddites? No cards. No phones. Not even any cash. How old are you? It all sounds weird.

Your husband is indeed a very big embarrassment.

Teenagers are the grumpiest customer facing staff members I have come across, acting like they are doing a favour to a customer and most people giving excuses for them.

In this scenario, old cashier was slightly unreasonable as sometimes mistakes happen but op's husband was totally out of order for calling him twat.

I love this post. I'm all for good customer service, but I think the husband went on the attack as a Neanderthal'esque defence mechanism.

Why is the man’s age relevant?

But the OP and her husband apologised. The guy should just have smiled and said “oh, these things happen. I’ve done it myself.” I absolutely f-ing HATE and despise people who are rude to waiters or shop assistants for no reason. That said, some people in retail really can be arseholes.

The customer service was poor but ur husband's comment trumps this- he is the twat

Why do you only have one bank card between you?

Your husband was out of line. No, it isn't unreasonable to be a bit annoyed that two people have no money, cards or phone to pay with between them.

Did either of you offer to put the stuff back on the shelves, or ask for it to be put aside? If not, why not?

Surely the silence from the customer assistant was actually because there were two of you and they were waiting for you to say something. Surely once they rang through the shopping you turned to your partner to say to pay. He would have then said I don't have my card. You might have then replied saying I asked you to bring it. The customer assistant may have been silent waiting for you two to come to a solution.
It's a bit different to the examples of people on their own who forget as the assistant would then interact more I imagine as they are the only other person present.

I asked this ages ago. It does seem odd that they went from ‘forgotten card’ to ‘TWAT’ via silent face-pulling without any communication from either party about finding a possible solution.

How was it poor customer service? They went to a shop, took six items to the till and had no means of paying, how is that the shop's fault exactly? The OP's DH is an idiot.

Stuff scanned and packed, ‘that’s £X’, turn to DH, ‘oh no, I’m sorry I’ve forgotten the card, I know you asked but I forgot’ ‘okay’, turn to man ‘I’m really sorry but I forgot my card’, scowl and silence, ‘sorry mate it was just an accident’ silence and scowl, ‘so much for customer service’ silence and scowl, ‘what’s your name?’ ‘X’ ‘okay thanks’ walks away ‘twat’.

No other customers around.

I would’ve ideally asked for it to be left aside but the man didn’t say anything and I felt like I’d inconvenienced him enough.

If we are popping out for less than an hour/to the shops we usually don’t take our phones because we don’t need them.

He wasn't "so rude". Ok, he wasn't effusively gracious about the extra work the OP's DH had created for him, but it's not a crime to look a bit disgruntled. OP's DH is the bigger twat here, not the man on the till.

The drip we were waiting for is that you and/or your husband apologised profusely for both being, well, twats, failing to bring what you needed, and wasting the assistant’s time. Probably giving him extra work as well. Who goes out without their own phone and their own bank card these days anyway? So you couldn’t cover for each other. You both sound rude AND incompetent. Why can’t you just apologise next time you’re in there, and make it clear you realise you made a mistake by which they were inconvenienced?

Strange there wasn't more communication from both yourself and your husband OP What did your husband want him to say/do? Your husband sounds very insecure if a look sends him into a tiz.

We have a 'saved transaction' button the till so we can clear the till and have a print out to scan when you come back with payment because this issue happens so often. So I doubt the shop assistant was THAT grumpy and annoyed, because it's such a regular occurrence. We just put the shopping aside and wait for you to come back and pay - it's not exactly open heart surgery.

Your DH was an utter pillock, probably because he knew it was entirely his fault and he was trying to distract your attention from how he'd forgotten the card. Make it someone else's fault, because they had a 'grumpy face'.