Friend wants me to look after her DC for 4 days

[FlyingHighandDry]

A friend has asked me to look after their 19 month old DS for 4 days / 3 nights in October while they go to a work event abroad (her and her DH work together)

I really really don’t want to do this.
She caught me on the hop asking me and I just stumbled over my words and ended up agreeing.
I will have to take time off from my job eating into my precious annual leave as even though the DC will be in nursery, they are only in 10-4 and my day including commute is 8-6.

They’ve made out like they’re doing me a favour by telling me I won’t need to have their elder DC as well as they have sorted that childcare!

Friend has a way of bulldozing people into doing things for them.
Please help me formulate something to say to back out of this.
I am a people pleaser and know I need to grow a pair….

But you’ve not let her down!!!

I don’t think talking in person would have made any difference.

Bloody hell. Why do people do crap like this?! This is why I no longer use social media!

@FlyingHighandDry It sounds like this has actually been a very positive thing to happen because you've had the pleasure of seeing the "real" person your "friend" is. You've had a lucky escape by the sounds of it! What a twatty fuck nugget of a person!

I'd comment on her FB post and say "Good idea. On it"

How about this on your facebook?

It's time to distance
yourself from the
people who let themselves
down, the cheeky-fucker
ones, it's time to start
loving yourself

FlyingHighandDry

I'd be willing to bet the DGP have said 'We'll take DC1 but you should take DC2 with you'

A 19 month old for that length of time is a HUGE ask at a HUGE responsibility.

And actually quite cruel to the child.

What an absolute CF legend this woman is - I can’t understand why she hasn’t got a fleet of Norwood Nannie’s to do her bidding. The sheer brass neck of her !!!!!
I wouldn’t reply and let this play out publicly but I would add a very chirpy and cheerful Good Luck HUN !!! 🍀
I don’t do PA messages but couldn’t resist sending something overly cloyingly supportive.

Btw everyone will read that and think wtf anyway.

'It's time to set yourself free
From people who expect you to set yourself on fire
to keep them warm.'

She just wants a babysitter she doesn't care about you. Stay strong and block her.

Totally aimed at you, and totally pathetic.

Give her no more thought!

Tell her to go live laugh love herself.

Respond with a laughing emoji. She is absolutely pathetic. Only the most self centred, childish wankers post those ridiculous quotes.

Your response:

Thats too polite. This is more suitable

This is an amazing suggestion 🤣

I love when users post junk like this on facebook, everyone who knows her irl knows she's trying to manipulate somebody. I wouldn't give her a second thought.

An old friend from school who I was facebook friends with but hadn't seen in 20+ years tried similar with me except it was so to stay at her home to care for her 30 yr old autistic son who she'd told me in the past was regularly physically violent, destroyed furniture, screamed the house down when he didn't get his way etc etc.

I told her I was in no way equipped to care for him especially as I didn't even know him, it would be unfair to both of us. She persisted and posted similar dumb memes trying to guilt me-it didn't work.

Then another old pal reconnected with me on facebook and tried to borrow a sum of money from-she obviously thought I'd forgotten the wad of cash she never repaid me 20 yrs ago too.

I deactivated facebook, these people are nuts. People feel free to ask favors they'd never have the nerve to do face to face!

Good job declining OP

She sounds delightful - so pleased you said no!

Reply with; 'Are you ok, hun?'

OP didn't change her friend's mind, she changed her own.

How sad OP. It looks as if you are going to miss out on many future opportunities to spend your holidays looking after someone else's toddler. :(

How will you cope?

I expect you are completely at a loss as to how to spend your days :)

Are you telling OP to cancel the cheque?

Like this story by her and say this so relatable and you are starting out yourself first too :)

This one is good too.

Rubbish

I’d go back with one too - something alluding to CF’s.

Or be bold and comment on her post - you railroaded me into immediately agreeing to look after your toddler only 4 days ago. After checking my diary and the dates etc, I told you 3 days later that I couldn’t do it, especially as it would mean I’d need to take 4 days of my limited annual leave to accommodate what you were asking of me.
You have over 6 weeks to find alternative childcare, maybe speak to one of your “consistent” friends - and add an eye roll emoji for good measure.

She is an absolute CF - I prob wouldn’t even give up my holiday to look after my niblings, let alone a bullying CF’s