Friend wants me to look after her DC for 4 days

[FlyingHighandDry]

A friend has asked me to look after their 19 month old DS for 4 days / 3 nights in October while they go to a work event abroad (her and her DH work together)

I really really don’t want to do this.
She caught me on the hop asking me and I just stumbled over my words and ended up agreeing.
I will have to take time off from my job eating into my precious annual leave as even though the DC will be in nursery, they are only in 10-4 and my day including commute is 8-6.

They’ve made out like they’re doing me a favour by telling me I won’t need to have their elder DC as well as they have sorted that childcare!

Friend has a way of bulldozing people into doing things for them.
Please help me formulate something to say to back out of this.
I am a people pleaser and know I need to grow a pair….

It is! So use her advice and dump that CF!

I've been following with interest. Got to love a passive aggressive social media post. Well done for holding your boundaries and for finding out who your 'friend' really is.

Omg OP 😂 😭 What an absolute twat haha. Ignore this idiot and get on with your life (which I’m sure you will!). She doesn’t seem to grasp the concept of life changing after kids, you cannot just bugger off on a 4 day work jolly with your husband when you fancy it and expect a friend to pick up the pieces. You’re so much better with her out of your life!

Wow! Just wow......
So hurtful, hope you are ok OP

Amazing.

Oh well, do what she says. Distance yourself, she'll move onto the next person she can take advantage of.

Send her a link to this, then block her.

Oh wow!!
Shes really feeling sorry for herself. Just ignore. Be like the queen was, don’t complain and dont explain. Only she knows this is aimed at you.

Omg she is actually unhinged

honestly op she is a CF of the highest order

Or better still, do this!

That's so childish.I think YOU need to be distancing yourself from HER OP!

Well that confirms that you did the right thing.

I'd be SO wanting to comment under that post.

I would like her story, so she knows you have seen it. What an absolute tit. I’d also, as others have said, be mighty tempted to send her the link to this thread!
You are much better off without her in your life!

Put up your own version - it's time to distance yourself from the people that would demand the world and offer nothing in return.

Seriously I agree with PPs - send her a link to her post and block her.

Pathetic woman, I would comment "I couldnt agree more" with a smiley face! It is true and it applies to you OP, not the CF

What a dreadful user this woman is, OP.

iBut the silly saying that only those we respect can hurt us is sadly not true, and I know this will hurt because it’s so incredibly unfair.

Please don’t contact her again and take comfort in the fact that you’ve removed a nasty, selfish user from your life. If you’d agreed to her request you’d have been fighting off further ones for years to come!

Good riddance to bad rubbish!

Put your own post on social media, complete with shit fake-calligraphic font. Something like ‘Never let the bastards grind you down’.
Or similar.
No doubt the hive mind of MN can think of something suitable.

Well if it is, she must be so chuffed you arent having 4 days unsupervised access to her child anymore

I think I would be curious to catch up with mutual friends and find out what version of events they have been told.

I very much suspect that this will be a case of ‘recollections may vary’…

Oh yes! Totally aimed at you but hopefully, you don't give a flying fucktoid about her inane "thought posting".

She is basically trying to bully you now. Just laugh and let it be water off a duck's back. Pay it no mind.

OR

Feel free to post a "saying" about people who try to abuse friendships and expecting the friend to turn their life upside down for that person's convenience.

(Make the better choice)👏

I'd like the post ! 🤣

Haven’t rtft, it’s not short at all- she has 8 weeks to find someone else! Maybe a family member!. After her post on fb, I would be very tempted to book a holiday the same time she asked you to have her dc and post some pics on fb yourself with the caption ‘ putting myself first for a change’ 🤣🤣

"It's time to distance yourself from the people who take you for granted"

"It's time to distance yourself from the people who expect more of you than you can reasonably give"

Just put one of those into a flowery font, and there you go

Sigh, I hate it when people post those passive aggressive quotes. Loser. I wonder how much time she spent searching for that online.

I wouldn’t respond, you’ve done nothing wrong.

What a lucky escape you had! Imagine if you had agreed to look after her DC something had happened while she was away, you might have given her DC something to eat or they might have got ill or it could have been anything. She would've been blaming you and posting on social media and making your life a misery. I would not comment, like or respond to her posts or messages. Take the higher moral ground and if she wants to tell people how you 'let her down' then I am sure people will read between the lines and know that there are two sides to every story. Putting your life on social media is very sad.