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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Messaged "celeb" crush and now feel like an idiot

163 replies

Notascouser1990 · 07/08/2025 18:44

A bit lighthearted. He is a member of a semi- famous indie band. I just replied to his IG story asking about his pet. Nothing at all flirty. I'd had a couple of glasses of wine when I did that. He didn't reply and now I feel like an absolute tit! AIBU to feel like this? He probably gets loads of messages from fans and doesn't really read them so I'm probably BU!

OP posts:
Dogaredabomb · 07/08/2025 22:10

PerfectTuesday · 07/08/2025 22:06

Mine is also dead. I won't say who as it might out me (used to go on about him constantly) - wonder if it's the same person 😆

I also can't say, everyone who's ever known me knows about my very long mega crush. To the point that I get badges, mugs etc as presents.

Dogaredabomb · 07/08/2025 22:11

And I got a few sympathy texts when he died, it was his time. I'm ok.

Notascouser1990 · 07/08/2025 22:18

@robertafirmino Love your username and your post made me laugh! From an LFC fan ☺️

OP posts:
Notascouser1990 · 07/08/2025 22:23

@saltandvinegarchipsticks I'm sorry but when I see Russel Crowe all I can think about is the fighting round the world South Park episode 🤣

OP posts:
ChessorBuckaroo · 07/08/2025 22:29

Fandango52 · 07/08/2025 20:24

I emailed a former England football manager (initials GS) via the FA last year to thank him for his work as manager. Not sure why I don’t fancy writing his full name, as he’s very well known - but I’ve gone all shy 😂 I don’t fancy him but just really respect and admire him. I never got a reply, and I doubt he even saw it, but I’m glad I did it.

Also emailed Adrien Brody’s agent earlier this year to congratulate him on his Oscar win. Again, just felt like it and never got a reply but glad I did it.

Very considerate of you that.

HangingOver · 07/08/2025 22:44

I used to work in a sleb management agency. Quite a lot of the general contact email address for the artists went to the all.staff general inbox. Trust me, it could have been a LOT worse 🤣

Daintydino · 07/08/2025 23:17

At least tell us the name of the band OP!

Notascouser1990 · 07/08/2025 23:27

@Fandango52 a certain ex Middlesbrough manager who went on to manage England by any chance? (I'm originally from Teesside).

OP posts:
Ivelostmyglasses · 07/08/2025 23:37

AnonyMousely · 07/08/2025 20:19

Yeah, people I’m pretty certain won’t ever see them though. Like Charli Xcx gets vegan recipes, Idles get crochet patterns, Sam Fender gets vegetarian recipes. I find it easier to find what I was looking for than the save post function.

Haha! I love this!

Fandango52 · 07/08/2025 23:53

Notascouser1990 · 07/08/2025 23:27

@Fandango52 a certain ex Middlesbrough manager who went on to manage England by any chance? (I'm originally from Teesside).

Edited

Got it in one! I have so much respect for him. He had a fantastic impact on the team and on English football whilst he was in the role. I know public opinion turned against him a fair bit towards the end of his role, which I think is a real shame, but I think he’ll have a solid legacy. Without wanting to get too mushy, he’s definitely a role model of mine.

Doitrightnow · 08/08/2025 00:06

Could've been worse. I once messaged a guy (who I did not fancy) after an event just to praise his incredible performance. He did respond...with a photo of his half naked body and a request for a nude photo of me. I didn't oblige.

Doitrightnow · 08/08/2025 00:09

Fandango52 · 07/08/2025 20:24

I emailed a former England football manager (initials GS) via the FA last year to thank him for his work as manager. Not sure why I don’t fancy writing his full name, as he’s very well known - but I’ve gone all shy 😂 I don’t fancy him but just really respect and admire him. I never got a reply, and I doubt he even saw it, but I’m glad I did it.

Also emailed Adrien Brody’s agent earlier this year to congratulate him on his Oscar win. Again, just felt like it and never got a reply but glad I did it.

That's sweet! If you haven't seen "Dear England", you might enjoy it, it's amazing.

Sodthesystem · 08/08/2025 00:32

Back when I didn't understand Instagram well I'm pretty sure I messaged Tom Felton a link to all my Edinburgh photos the weekend I went there for his book signing instead of just tagging him to the one where he was on stage xD Mortified haha. I doubt he ever saw it though.

It doesn't seem so bad, yours. Sometimes they do respond but probably not usually. I've had the band We are Viola and a Spanish actor I like reply to me on insta before though. Both on the same day!!! Must have had luck on my side lol.

ruethewhirl · 08/08/2025 00:36

ruethewhirl · 07/08/2025 21:57

If this is who I think it is, I saw him at a festival recently and he’s aged very well…

Oops, meant to quote @Phoebesparrow’s post there! Guessed you were talking about Chesney 😄 I’m the other way round, he didn’t do anything for me back in the day but I wouldn’t say no now 😄

VegemiteOnToast · 08/08/2025 00:43

Messages from people you don't follow go into an 'other' folder so he probably hasn't even seen it unless he specifically checks there.
Don't worry about it - I have replied to minor celebs before when they have asked questions or if they are wearing something I like and I want to know where it's from. Sometimes they reply, sometimes they don't, probably depends how social media savvy they are and how much time they have.
Don't sweat it! But he's probably not going to marry you either!

YourAquaLion · 08/08/2025 01:04

Aw bless you! Don’t worry at all! He may not have even seen it, and if he has, he will think it is sweet, and he won’t have replied as he will have so many! Don’t be embarrassed, you said a nice thing to him that he may or may not have seen, all is good. At least you’re not a horrible troll saying awful things about people on there, that’s when you should feel ashamed and embarrassed!

Notascouser1990 · 08/08/2025 02:37

Just want to say these replies have really cheered me up. I'm living in Liverpool in temp accommodation atm (I have another thread on that) and it's nice to engage with people even if you are all strangers x

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MenopauseSucks · 08/08/2025 04:19

I had a really lovely Twitter reply from a famous comedian about a Netflix series he did. I was commenting about the portrayal of the parent-child relationship when the parent has dementia, the fleeting moments of joy when the person they were before appears, when they recognise you as their child once more.
It was a nice reply - as gentle as the writing & acting in the series was.
Im pretty sure it was him as it appears he runs his Twitter account not a PR team however if it is run by a PR team then they’re bloody good….

On a more embarrassing note, I wrote to Ioan Gruffudd as I’d found his name & address in the telephone directory around the time of the series Hornblower.
Why was I looking him up? Just why? Why?
I still don’t know why I was looking him up in the first place…
I was warning him that he was at risk of fans turning up… Highly ironic.
I got a sweet reply & signed pic & his name & address disappeared from the public view. Still got the pic!!!

SitOnHisFaceIfHeDiesHeDies · 08/08/2025 04:21

MenopauseSucks · 08/08/2025 04:19

I had a really lovely Twitter reply from a famous comedian about a Netflix series he did. I was commenting about the portrayal of the parent-child relationship when the parent has dementia, the fleeting moments of joy when the person they were before appears, when they recognise you as their child once more.
It was a nice reply - as gentle as the writing & acting in the series was.
Im pretty sure it was him as it appears he runs his Twitter account not a PR team however if it is run by a PR team then they’re bloody good….

On a more embarrassing note, I wrote to Ioan Gruffudd as I’d found his name & address in the telephone directory around the time of the series Hornblower.
Why was I looking him up? Just why? Why?
I still don’t know why I was looking him up in the first place…
I was warning him that he was at risk of fans turning up… Highly ironic.
I got a sweet reply & signed pic & his name & address disappeared from the public view. Still got the pic!!!

Love Ricky!

NevilleBigBottom · 08/08/2025 05:37

AnonyMousely · 07/08/2025 20:19

Yeah, people I’m pretty certain won’t ever see them though. Like Charli Xcx gets vegan recipes, Idles get crochet patterns, Sam Fender gets vegetarian recipes. I find it easier to find what I was looking for than the save post function.

This is hilarious

NevilleBigBottom · 08/08/2025 05:43

Dogaredabomb · 07/08/2025 20:50

I DID THIS TOO!!!!

I went a bit further and would phone his agent fairly frequently and ask where he would next be appearing. I also sent a birthday card, in which I invited him out for a curry.

Um, there's more. I waited at the stage door a couple of times and got his autograph. One of the times I was pretty drunk and thought about following him.

Don't worry, he's dead now (it wasn't me).

😂😂😂

Liondoesntsleepatnight · 08/08/2025 07:43

I proposed to mine. Bored at work one day, found an email address, emailed a heartfelt proposal.

MidlifeSpinalCrisis · 08/08/2025 08:52

I sometimes reply to Instagram stories, with positive messages. For example, recently a young and fairly low-level actor that I've always thought was stand-out, announced on his stories that he has landed the main role in a big upcoming project. This is a huge break for him. So I replied saying congratulations and that I'd always thought he was destined for bigger things because of his magnetism on screen and talent being so palpable. He hasn't seen or replied, I don't care, it's still what i think. Or, if a female celeb posts a story of them dressed up for an event and I think their dress/skin/hair looks great, I'll reply and tell them. Or someone posts their kids and they look cute, I'll say so.

I don't expect a reply. I just think, on the off chance that they ever do read things, it's worth expressing the compliments and kind words so that it may balance out the trolling, hate messages, and weirdos asking for foot pics 🤷‍♀️ i don't ever feel embarrassed about saying nice things. I also give unprompted compliments to strangers in real life. Life's short, be nice.

And occasionally, I do get replies! Some generic, where it's like a social media manager, but a couple of times I've had full on replies.

For example, I follow an actress who started out as a teen and was pretty but fairly normal looking. She ended up moving to Hollywood and has had some roles (not a-list, but was working steadily). Unsurprisingly, she had a major glow-up once she reached Hollywood. One day during the first covid lock down, she posted a story of her working out at home (gyms all closed). I replied saying well done for the self discipline and that she looks fantastic. I was feeling pretty down about my weight at the time and, thinking she'll never see this message, said I've always struggled with my weight and wished I was able to transform my body in the way she has and asked what diet she follows. She replied!!! Like a full on long message. She didnt give me any of her real diets tips, it was the generic "I listen to my body and intuit what I need to nourish" type diet info, but it was a very kind and supportive message. I think because it was that weird first month of lockdown where everyone felt a bit panicked and weird, and locked in their homes alone, and she was probably bored and lonely. I replied and we had like a bit of a chat back and forth.

So, I wouldn't be embarrassed op. Social media is supposed to be a two-way thing.

Fandango52 · 08/08/2025 09:33

Doitrightnow · 08/08/2025 00:09

That's sweet! If you haven't seen "Dear England", you might enjoy it, it's amazing.

Thanks for the recommendation! I saw it with my Dad - who’s also a big football fan - and we loved it. Glad you enjoyed it too 😊 I also recently saw they’re adapting it into a TV series, so I’m looking forward to seeing that when it comes out.

Lifestooshort71 · 08/08/2025 16:12

I love all of these and it's turned out to be such a kind and gentle thread 🥰. Nice to know The Crush is still alive and beating in our hearts!