AIBU about “adopt don’t shop”?

[totallybonafido]

Yes I know it’s better to adopt rather than to buy a kitten from some random person online - but rescue places make it so difficult! I’m trying to get a new friend for my cat and I’m not getting anywhere.

I've contacted all local rescues, big and small, who claim to be inundated with cats and kittens, and been told:
• they only re home kittens in pairs
• you can’t adopt if you’re out at work during the day
• you can’t adopt if you don’t have a cat flap
• if uk you adopt, you have to agree that the cat will be indoor only
• we won’t give give you a cat if you have children
• we don’t have any single kittens at the moment

These are just the ones that have responded, many don’t.

If they really are inundated and struggling to rehome cats, you’d think they’d be a bit less picky? I got my current cat from a random lady online whose 2 cats had litters at the same time, so she had about 10 kittens at once. I’ve just seen on pets4homes that she has another 12 kittens to re home now, it’s beyond irresponsible and she has no idea who she’s giving them to. I want to do the responsible thing here, but I probably am going to end up buying a kitten off some random again as the alternative has too many obstacles.

She has cats and breeds them. That doesn't make her in any way awful. She may be supplementing a low income or it may allow her to keep her cats. Despite what everyone seems to think breeding animals for sale is not a high road to huge - or any - profit. Vet bills, food bills, bills for housing, bedding, vaccinations etc all mean that for the most part a breeder will make very little - if you factor getting up 4 times a night to feed kittens because mum won't or can't, then any profit is miniscule.
No, I don't breed cats.

We had similar with an RSPCA centre, passed the telephone interview and home video. They wanted to see all of us (me, DH and 2 DDs) together for a meet and greet, all good but they shut at 4pm and the centre was 45m away from us and our kids got home from school at 3.30pm so it was impossible to arrange.

The strict criteria is having the opposite effect to what they want. People just end up buying.

We ended up getting a kennel club puppy which I didn't want to do.

I’m on quite a few cat rescue pages and the rising trend of insisting many kittens go in pairs or to homes with an existing cat bemuses me. Cats are largely solitary and territorial by nature. Studies have shown that most cats in multi-cat households either tolerate or learn to tolerate each other rather than actively getting along. My experience of bonded kittens is that once they hit maturity love turns to hate! I’m aware that some cats do actively become or stay bonded but it’s often more of an exception than the rule.

Given the circumstances OP just be aware that your existing cat may not take so well to a newcomer and even if they appear to get on as kittens it is no guarantee they still will once they start to mature.

But perfect shouldn’t include the crazy criterion some demand

The one I got my kittens from wouldn't have had anything like these costs! Definitely no bills for vets or vaccinations, they hadn't had these. Not sure what housing or bedding costs there would be? So the tiny amount of food for the few weeks that they would have been on solids before leaving her. She was charging £100 per kitten!! 10 earlier this year, 12 currently...and I bet she'd done it before, the mum of my cats was 3, so it's not like she was a kitten herself who'd escaped and gotten pregnant before she could be spayed.

He has his own long running thread 🤣 Lots of pic on there

www.mumsnet.com/talk/the_doghouse/5319893-for-the-love-of-pod?page=22&reply=146241447

Thanks. Do you want him? half joking

Not really related to your question, and this may be controversial, but I think the pro-life / no-kill shelters are not the greatest. Before I adopted my first cat, I thought I'd go to the SPCA as they have a short time period of looking for a good home before putting to sleep. So I thought I'd be saving a life. Then, I started volunteering at a no-kill shelter. Some of the dogs and cats had been languishing there for years and were clearly depressed. I know every animal has a right to life, but is keeping an animal in a shelter for years and years perhaps more cruel than putting it to sleep after a few months, if no good home is found?

So I changed my mind and decided to adopt from a no-kill shelter, to rescue the cat from possibly years of waiting for a home. I adopted a 1 year-old, one-eyed boy. He was so happy to be brought home with me and is the most loving and affectionate boy. But he came with a host of health issues - snuffles (a high percentage of shelter cats have snuffles), an autoimmune condition that caused him severely painful gum disease and loose teeth, and parasites. Luckily I live for my animals and have pet insurance so was able to pay for him to have all the necessary vet visits and treatments to get him healthy.

So I'm conflicted - shelter cats can make amazing, grateful, loving pets, but often come with physical or mental health problems. For me, I'd prefer to adopt from a place like this because I feel I'm rescuing a cat from a horrible situation. But I have no kids and am dedicated to my pets, and this may not be the best option for other families.

I think there needs to be better regulation of the no-kill, 'hoarder'-type shelters. I donate to them, because they do need the help and they do have good intentions (even if they are a bit batshit, as a PP said). But I think they sometimes keep the animals in less than ideal conditions.

Forgot to add pics - this is Pinky the Pirate - thinking of getting him an eyepatch.

How does insisting you both have a cat flap and keep the cat indoors work?

This has come up at least twice in the thread, these were demands from different rescues, not all the same place.

I agree OP, I wanted to adopt cats and give a loving home to animals who needed one. I would have been their devoted, responsible and knowledgeable hooman.

But none of the local rescue charities would allow me to adopt because I live three doors up from a B road and was not happy to agree to keeping the cats indoors all the time.

I ended up buying a litter of kittens from a friend of a friend who constantly lets her cat get pregnant. I love them dearly and look after them very well but I know my purchase gave the 'breeder' a reason to encourage the production of ever more baby cats.

It is controversial, but I actually agree. Any life is not always better than no life.

It’s the same with dogs. We ended up getting ours privately from a friend of a friend who needed to rehome as our local shelter made an issue of us both having jobs. Surely most people have jobs, it has never prevented me from owning dogs all of my life previously.

I would love to but my cats would probably lose their sh*t 🤣

Hardly impossible when you could have let the kids have an afternoon off school...not ideal but hardly the end of the world.

Most of my animals have come from someone who knows someone "getting rid" of a pet - cats, turkeys, reptiles, rabbits etc. The kids have also brought home kittens and a stranger once tracked me down at my sports club to dump a dog on me as they knew I took in animals.
I got hens from a charity rehousing ex farm birds and I got 2 dogs from abroad.
I've also brought stray pets home from my work including a snake that had been found stuck to a glue pad.
I once told a man I'd take in 2 guinea pigs and he turned up at mine with said guinea pigs, a cage full of mixed sexed rats which turned 10 rats into nearly 30 and a box containing mice.

Happy days!, I love it!

Just get it out on the grapevine you're after a cat and the offers will roll in.

We had the same when we wanted to adopt a dog.
refused because

• we hadn’t had a dog before
• we had a child (he was 11)

I was at home all day & we had a garden.
one adoption place said they would ‘allocate ‘ us a dog no choice on breed and we couldn’t meet it beforehand.

We did adopt a retired greyhound from a greyhound rescue group who has been spoiled loved but all for the past ten years. 🐾

one adoption place said they would ‘allocate ‘ us a dog no choice on breed and we couldn’t meet it beforehand.
This sort of thing would be unbelievable if it hadn't happened to so many of us. People on a power trip using poor helpless animals to make themselves feel important. They even boast about it as if making adoption difficult is something to be proud of in its own right.
It's tragic.
Sometimes I think most of the rescues should be disbanded and new sensible ones put in their place, that actually want to find homes for the animals. Ones that don't need to (or get off on) guilt tripping people who want to love and save an animal, because they genuinely want that too.

We adopted a cat last year from the RSPCA and didn’t have any if those issues. Only adopted one cat, we have two already, we have children (they are mid teens so maybe that does apply), we don’t have a cat flap and at the time one cat is/was outdoor and the other indoor although we always planned for new cat to be indoor. We did have to have a video interview where we showed them our house - including our bedroom which we didn’t exiect so DH walked in and had to show them under the bed - where I had a pair of dirty knickers from the night before 🤣

She cost £120 but that included first lot of injections and her spaying operation so pretty good value - our last two cats cost £150 from private sellers and we got nothing included.

You're complaining about some rescues having an indoor cat only rule, when yours just got run over?!

Domestic cats don't belong in this ecosystem anyway; they are a massive contributor to wildlife deaths (both directly, and by spreading toxoplasma gondii).

...so we should euthanise all cats?

No people should be obliged to keep them under control just like we expect dogs to be so in the house or in a catio or cat proofed garden .