AIBU about “adopt don’t shop”?

[totallybonafido]

Yes I know it’s better to adopt rather than to buy a kitten from some random person online - but rescue places make it so difficult! I’m trying to get a new friend for my cat and I’m not getting anywhere.

I've contacted all local rescues, big and small, who claim to be inundated with cats and kittens, and been told:
• they only re home kittens in pairs
• you can’t adopt if you’re out at work during the day
• you can’t adopt if you don’t have a cat flap
• if uk you adopt, you have to agree that the cat will be indoor only
• we won’t give give you a cat if you have children
• we don’t have any single kittens at the moment

These are just the ones that have responded, many don’t.

If they really are inundated and struggling to rehome cats, you’d think they’d be a bit less picky? I got my current cat from a random lady online whose 2 cats had litters at the same time, so she had about 10 kittens at once. I’ve just seen on pets4homes that she has another 12 kittens to re home now, it’s beyond irresponsible and she has no idea who she’s giving them to. I want to do the responsible thing here, but I probably am going to end up buying a kitten off some random again as the alternative has too many obstacles.

I completely agree with you. I understand rescues have to be careful. But my mum was repeatedly overlooked to adopt a series of dogs.

She is a prime candidate for a rescue dog. She works from home, lives alone, large enclosed garden in the countryside, experience of several breeds.

After a year of trying to adopt, she bought an older dog that was being rehomed on Pets4Homes.

We bought a puppy ourselves in December, didn't bother to approach the rescues because of mum's experience. As someone who works 5 days a week, with 3 children at home and 2 cats, I didn't fancy our chances! (Doggo is perfectly cared for btw, goes to mums during the day while I'm at work, to play with her dog)!

Ha! My massive, hyperactive, idiot dog was like this. They saw we worked from home, had a garden and were very active and practically threw him in the car. Luckily he's adorable and an asshole

I don't think anyone is against rescues having rules. But I think they do need to be a bit more realistic in some of their criteria. Preventing people adopting, isn't going to prevent them from buying.

We've just adopted a new kitten and the SSPCA were practically throwing her at us! They did say they're currently inundated with litters so perhaps being a little less stringent than usual.
We have another cat and two children so were expecting it to be far more difficult but I sent in an enquiry form Saturday evening, got a phone call Sunday and collected her on the Wednesday. All they asked for was evidence that our existing cat was neutered/chipped/vacced and a walk through video of the home environment. It was surprisingly easy.

Just a warning OP. I have twice over the years tried to introduce a kitten to an established cat at home. The first time my older cat left home, and the second time the kitten grew to bully my older cat and she stopped spending any time inside.

From reading all these threads over the years I agree that they make it ridiculously hard for people to adopt. We adopted two from a really great rescue. We reached out describing our living arrangements and asked if they had suitable cats. They replied with a list each time. Where in the UK are you? I’m happy to recommend.

We ended up buying our DDog from an (responsible) breeder after being rejected by several rescues. We have an enclosed garden, someone is home all day, we have a park at the end of our road, and we’d deliberately waited until the children were older (7 & 10 at the time, they were also very used to and very good with dogs as they’d grown up around their grandma’s).

No one would let us have a dog. One rescue refused us because they were worried the dog might jump our fence. Our fences are 6 foot high and the dog was daschund size. I asked if they were planning to equip him with a trampoline, as otherwise I couldn’t see how that would be possible. They didn’t seem to appreciate the sarcasm…

WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DOG!!!

If you are in Berkshire, have you tried Battersea in Old Windsor? When we adopted our cat, they were very reasonable. They did talk about us fitting a cat flap but it was not a condition we had to meet before adopting. In fact 8 years and later and in the second house, I still do not have one. The cat is perfectly fine without. They had both indoor and outdoor cats available.
I don’t know if this has changed since COVID but back then you could just turn up for a visit at certain times.

THIS. I tried to adopt an elderly retired greyhound - they told me the dog couldnt possibly come to work with me part time in a quiet office as it would be upset by the other people there (there are 2 of us in our office- me and one other person). Yet apparently it was absolutely fine sitting in a shelter cubicle with a daily stream of numerous random people coming by to stare at it all day long and tap on the glass.

I have no issue with rules but what some of these shelters are looking for are unicorns - people that dont exist. They dont want people to work and yet they expect them to spend £££ on vet's bills for animals with health issues. They dont want anyone to have children (regardless of age), one of the dogs I saw they actually told me couldnt deal with any visitors to the home (so that means you cant even have your own bloody friends to visit you).

If they want to be that stringent then fine, but you have no right to lecture/scold other people when they go elsewhere.

I think it must be area dependent. There are lots of independent cat places near me that don’t require you take 2 (I think maybe they do if they are kittens). It’s dependant on the cat whether it’s indoors/outdoors/secure garden.

I got our latest from Blue Cross who didn’t make any requirements on us at all.

Exactly this! My boy (a cocker spaniel puppy) came to work with me every day for the first 3 months I had him, slept under my desk. Went for short walks a couple of times a day and was perfectly happy. We also have a tiny office with very few people. He now spends weekdays with my mum and her dog, so he has the garden to roam but still comes here on occasion and is perfectly fine when he does.

I could not agree more that for the majority of dogs, a home life is far better for them than a shelter life. Even if that means making a few concessions on being left, having children or smaller gardens for example.

😆😆😆

We adopted our cat from a rescue and there were none of those caveats. We lived near a main road at the time and wanted a house cat for that reason. Our cat had already made the decision herself to be a housecat. Obviously, there was an adoption fee so, as a charity they can help other animals. It's appalling and sad when people buy animals from dodgy so-called breeders when the rescues are full to bursting.

I shopped - I wanted a kitten I knew didn’t have an behavioural issues (due to trauma or the like) to bring to my home with my gentle elderly cat that was lonely following the loss of her sister. YANBU

We have taken rescue kittens successfully, but we were happy to take 2 so that helped, and it was from a small local rescue.

But yes, OP, you are right and I know so many people who just gave up and found animals privately through friends of friends.

Exactly! It made me so sad because the dog looked so depressed and shut down. I would have loved to have given him a home, he would have had a wonderful life and he would have been so, so loved. But no, far better he stay in a shelter cage being stared at but never chosen. Urgh.

We had a child, both worked ft and don't have a cat flap. Finding an indoor cat was difficult. Why would they ask you to have a cat flap if they were apparently insisting that you had to have an indoor cat?

It's fab that was your experience, but there are plenty of rescues that do have these caveats (and more).

If people aren't being accepted from a rescue, that shouldn't mean they can't buy a pet if that's what they choose.

@HangingOver that is a fantastic dog , can you post some more pics please . No advice about cats as we have an indoor cat and catio .

I think the various responses were from a variety of rescues and the OP couldn’t fit the criteria for any .

I got my 2 cats from an overseas rescue. They were fantastic ( vet checked, all paperwork sorted) and my cats are amazing.

Tried to adopt in the uk but they were so incredibly unhelpful with unrealistic conditions. Almost like they don't realise what the actual point is

We did try them about 10 years ago, they wouldn't give us a cat as we both worked full time. I have just filled in their form.

i cant believe they still do the pairs thing, our cat was/is a rescue kitten 17 yrs ago - they wanted me to take 2 and i couldnt commit financially as I always do insurance and vet plan/flea plan etc
I ended up emailing the head office or director or something of the Cats Protection League and having a rant.

Little monster is next to me 17 yrs later meowing for attention.

We got our cats from rescues, the first one when we still had a flat. Have they got more ridiculous in their demands? Our current one was from a local Cats Protection. She was advertised as “indoor” ( yeah right!!) and we had primary school aged DC at the time and there were no issues with that at all.
I refuse to have a cat flap too so despite having at least one cat for continuously for 25 years, would the no cat flap be a problem now?