To not have sex for 8 years because I have small breasts

[islaw3048unfln]

I know men strongly prefer larger breasts, that's what 99% look at, and want, even when the rest of a woman's figure is just straight up and down as long as she has big boobs it's hot/amazing etc to them.

I know I could get laid (men will sleep with anything that isn't Quasimodo), but I don't want to be settled for, a body just to use but that they aren't really turned on by.

So I just don't feel like sex, never in the mood, I don't want to be dating where a man is just eyeing up other bustier women all the time and feeling unsatisfied/wishing there were two balloons up top in bed.

I was an A/B cup when i started dating my husband 11 years ago, never an issue he’s always preferred bums in general anyway. They are bigger now due to putting on weight/having DD but if I could click my fingers and have my old body back I absolutely would 😂

You are looking at this in such a black and white way, very few people have the perfect body, any man worth your time is not going to care and will find you sexy, these connections are not as transactional as you are describing. Also, I would say the men you describe are not the majority anyway, just the loudest.

if you are happy to keep in this mindset, carry on, no one here will be able to convince you otherwise, but if you do feel this is effecting you negatively and want to start dating/start a meaningful relationship I think you need to tackle this thinking as from the outside it doesn’t seem rational. It may even be helpful to look at therapy to get to the bottom of this thought process.

My DH is a nipple man, likes them small and hard. He doesn’t like big breasts as nipples tend to be bigger. It really isn’t a one size fits all subject, lol

TBF, it’s a subject we’ve talked about very little, the above makes it seem like we’ve had full in depth conversations.

there are as many opinions as there are men, they aren’t all of one mind, thank god!

"more than a handful is a waste" 😂 is the motto of many men

Instead of denying yourself a healthy natural sex like .
Maybe change your attitude . Be selfish and pick someone your attracted too and focus on that instead of worrying too much on what they think .
Also the men who are noticeably eyeing up large breasts are creeps on my opinion and your better or without them . Not all men are creeps

it's not that you have small breasts @islaw3048unfln

"Women want to be desirable and feel desirable" it's that you don't feel desirable, because, somehow, you have the perception that men prefer big breasts.

That's purely an insecurity of yours which you can definitely address

I work in a factory with mainly men. Im an F cup but you know what the men im most comfortable with, if they make any comment its always about my arse. Not all men are boob men. And before anyone says anything it doesnt bother me, it goes over my head and most of the time I just say thank you 😂

She has posted before and twice if I remember rightly , be it a woman or man and is very fixated and weird, I’m not even going to waste my time replying, whoever they are they are unhinged and need help.

In my experience most men are happy to have sight and feel of any size of breasts because they are happy to be getting sex.

Men have different tastes in women in the same way women have different taste in men. What sort of men do you fancy? Tall, short, well built, skinny, dark hair or blond. Or do you look at less physical properties, kind, affectionate, generous. The world is full of people and no two of them think the same. You are allowing a distorted body image to ruin your life, get out there and talk to real men you will find lots that don't give a toss about breast size, you are actually being really sexist about men saying they can't see past the size of a woman's breasts.

I understand this is a major insecurity of yours so I am not trying to dismiss your feelings, but honestly, straight men just find boobs attractive. However they find them. Big/small/pert/starting to sag etc. If it gets to the point of a man seeing your breasts, he’s having the time of his life.

Unlike penis size which is hidden until the main event; men that you come across in a romantic (or potentially romantic) way will already have an idea of the size of your boobs. They aren’t going to be mortified that you have small boobs when you take your top off.

My DH loves my boobs. He loved them when we first met, he loved them in the midst of pregnancies/breastfeeding where they changed, and he loves them now. He’d love them if I had a reduction, he’d love them if I had implants. He loves them because they’re boobs and he’s a straight man.

What you might find (if you do start having sex) is that men avoid your boobs if you’re obviously uncomfortable with them. They might not feel that they can ahem engage.

But if they can't see past flaws how are they going to still love you when you're 70+? You want someone who loves you despite your flaws surely? If you had big boobs and they were round your knees at 70 wouldn't you still expect your DH to love you?

I think you're way too hung up on this and I say that as an A cup who's very happy to still be pert at 50. There's pros and cons with everything in life!

If you don't want sex then that's absolutely fine, but being a martyr to your breasts is ridiculous.

Who has told you men like larger breasts?

Some might, some prefer smaller and some like whatever they can get!

It’s clear you have a pretty severe caricature of men built up in your head, OP. Your projections don’t align with reality.

I think typically most men would prefer a slimmer woman and slimmer women naturally have smaller breasts than people who are overweight.

Do some men like porn star style massive boobs? Yeah, but I think most men like the natural girl next door type look in my experience.

@islaw3048unfln honestly some men don’t care though. I have quite big boobs and my ex was a right hottie and told me constantly I was beautiful and I should add never looked at other women even though on nights out in busy clubs/pubs he def got eyed up by several. And yet, he never paid any attention to the twins (😭). He adored my ankles(?!) and couldn’t get enough of DTD but I never really felt our sex life fulfilling when parts of me where touch was so important were treated like they didn’t exist.

So there you go, I think it’s as with everything just a media invention and not every man is after the same!

Most women with larger breasts are also rather plump.

When I was young, slender and a B cup I didn't lack male attention or interest.

I've recently gone down from 36E to 34D and it's such a relief. I can wear cropped tops and non-wired bras.

Yes!

If men didn’t like women with small boobs, then by a process of natural selection, there wouldn’t be any small breasted women left on earth, as only the well endowed women would have partners and go onto procreate.

Most people having sex are not just doing it purely for physical features, unless it's a one night stand.... usually there's some kind of spark of mutual mental attraction.

Plenty of people would be thrilled to sleep with someone who had smaller boobs. I think you're hanging around the wrong men.

That’s really kind but a 28C does not look like what people think a C cup is. It looks like what most people would say is a full À to small B.

so what is it, exactly, you would like us to say to you @islaw3048unfln that would alleviate your concern?

You're being silly. Very few women have the kind of boobs you see in porn, but the vast majority of women don't have a problem finding partners. Do you really think all these women are in relationships with men, who are just settling for subpar boobs?

Perhaps the more likely answer would be that men are attracted to different things. They could even be attracted to both small and large breasts, if could believe it.

Honestly I think confidence is often what makes someone sexy, irrespective of the specific body type. I’m sure some men do prefer larger breasts, but most either don’t care or may prefer smaller.

It sounds like this is something you need to work on for yourself, perhaps in counselling.

Most men don’t like Katie Price… I was thinking more of natural big breasts on a slimmer woman, like Kate Upton, Katy Perry.

Obviously I don’t know for sure that men with smaller breasted wives/girlfriends secretly lust after women with big boobs…. I just imagine that most or many do.

No I am not a man. I have a big problem with my boobs, I’m not the first woman to be like this.