Pressured into having a baby by older partner

[courtneyk92]

I've been seeing a 45 year old man, I am a 32 year old female. He looks after me so well. I've been dating him since 2023, and just these last few months gotten serious where we've moved in together. He has 3 grown children, all 20+ (had them young). I have a 8 and 6 year old who he adores. He really wants more kids, since he met me he has said "every single day I vision what our children will look like" , "my dream is to have a baby with you", "are you prepared to give me a baby", " I want lots of babies with you" and just begs me for a baby constantly. to the extent he keeps taking the Condom off.. and purposely ... inside me and I keep taking the morning after pill and its making me so sick. I feel so pressured because he gets moody if I say no :( any advice ?

And claim “he looks after me so well”…

First post nails it. He's not bothered about what you want and feel at all.

Also rape...

I'm so sorry OP... @courtneyk92

Please get away from him. Phone women's aid for help as he's done a number on you moving in...

I'm also worried for your kids. He may be a direct risk to them too.

Is this from another culture? It sounds really really weird. Controlling. Take your kids and get out of there. You’re still young and will find someone who’s a much better fit for you.

Thank god for that. He is abusive. Get him the fuck away from your children.

and ffs get some counselling. You started the post by saying He looks after me so well and finished the paragraph by describing how he regularly sexually assaults you.

Omg please get out asap is it your home or his? He is raping you definitely get the kids away from him. I would not trust him phone the police if you have to he’s a rapist.

That’s what you think “looking after you” means? How can you let this man stay in your house, abusing you, and your children learning - from you - that rape, control, bullying and threats are actually acceptable?

If your daughter wrote this thread, what would you say?

Get the police involved before there’s no way out.

He sounds revolting!

You've said you're going to leave him OP, please don't change your mind whatever crap and bullshit he comes out with. This man is dangerous!!

And comments like these are the reason a lot of women don’t report rape, they are scared of not being believed

Oh op - he is absolutely awful.

im so happy you’re leaving him, but PLEASE do some work on yourself before dating again. Freedom program, women’s aid etc.
women with a healthy mindset, which you will have after you’ve ditched this rapist and given yourself some time, would have ditched him when he mentioned having babies far far too soon in your relationship. It’s creepy.

Another poster here saying get out.
Start taking contraceptive pill ASAP so he doesn't trap you.

What did you actually mean by ‘treats you so well?’ If you mean financially, then that doesn’t give someone the right to rape you. You don’t owe him that regardless of how he treats you.

Dump him immediately. Taking the condom off without permission is rape. He’s forcibly trying to get you pregnant. This is abuse and controlling behaviour.

Leave with your children and get out. Now. Do not go back.

This is abuse...

Also you should go to the police.

Umm, you can’t be serious.
You and your children are living with a rapey bastard.
Please get out.

Horrible. Leave him

Just leave asap

@courtneyk92 that is called stealthing and can actually be classed as rape!!!! why are you with someone like that?????

sorry for sounding harsh, but you are an object to him, not a human being. he uses your body for sex without caring whether you want or not and he wants to use your body for procreating. Get rid asap.

Treats you so well?
clearly, he doesn’t.
I’m glad to read you’re planning to leave him!
Please do so safely, and make sure you have lots of support in place.

Run.

Removing the condom is so fucked up.
Have you told him that you don't want a baby? The communication is miles apart.