Was this comment by the waiter a bit off?

[doriiii]

This is something that happened a couple of weeks ago but not sure if I'm being overly sensitive.

Went to meet a few friends for some food in a nice pub. I arrived a bit later due to work hours. When I arrived I asked the waiter where they were sat and he walked me over. I asked if they accepted blue light cards, and he said 'only if you say pretty please'.

It really grossed me out, and I knew he wouldn't have said it to my male friends.

I didn't say anything but did kind of laugh when I said 'right ok'.

AIBU to think it's just a bit of a gross comment?

Where did I say I considered reporting him?

Ew

Or maybe some women prefer to look after themselves and throw some banter back. It beats getting irritated, at tge slightest comment.

If you say so. I believe being friendly is part of being polite.

I think it was just banter. Maybe he should have read the room, because you have to be careful about what you say nowadays. I personally couldn't get worked up over such a comment though.

How old was the waiter?

I don't see why you assume he wouldn't have said it to a man. I can envisage circumstances where.a waiter might well say the same thing to a bloke. I wouldn't have wasted any time thinking it over, let alone two weeks.

Highly unlikely IMO.

Definitely a bit misogynistic. I would just ignore and and move on though. People can be dicks

I would like to think I would have had the presence of mind to fix him with a Hard Stare and say coldly "Well do you or not?" but I probably wouldn't have done.

What an arsehole.

And obviously he wouldn't have said it to a bloke.🙄

I would have thought he was a bit of a dick then forgotten about it and moved on with my life

I have moments when I say something really stupid and I immediately think to myself self “ why the hell did I say that for?”

it usually happens when I’m tired 😂

I wouldn’t think much of it

Silly thing to say but
silly thing to still be dwelling on weeks later

Just move on.

Move on, it was a stupid comment but I would not mull it over or give it a second thought, neither would I look to be offended.

I'd probably have thought he was a dickhead (they're not in short supply). But wouldn't be mulling it over 2 weeks later. Maybe I'm missing a trick though.

Someone (man, obv) muttered FFS!!! to me on the pavement in February-ish when I didn't instantly move aside to let him pass (we were both coming round a corner from opposite sides). Should I start a start a thread?

This.

no wonder the population is drowning under a sea of mental issues.

I’m waiting for the first post of ‘…and he had the temerity to BREATHE…! should I have complained’?

it will happen…

Stop and pause and say ‘I missed that what did you say again’

eye ball

According to some posters here then of course he would have said it to a man. As if!

Because they are hardwired to find offense in this day and age.

I could have easily commented about the OP saying "When I arrived I asked the waiter where they were sat", because they weren't "sat", they were "sitting". The word is "sitting".

Petty, yes, but it's a perfect example of how no one is in fact perfect, and an example of how we all pick up on different things.

Unless "pretty please" has some sort of dark undertone which I don't know about (and having looked on Google that doesn't appear to be the case), it was just a silly thing to say. I may or may not have laughed about it at the time, depending on how it was said - I wasn't there to judge. But I don't know in what world it would have offended me, unless perhaps he's added the word "BITCH" and the end of his sentence.

Jesus, some people just want to be offended about anything. It’s just a silly joke - he’s probably used it hundreds of times. If you’re really dwelling on it weeks after the event, then you’re beyond help. Absolutely bloody ridiculous.

If he were a heterosexual male, definitely not. It sounds like a neanderthal attempt to flirt with OP, imo. They no longer have clubs to bang on the ground or dead woolly mammoth to lug home to impress the ladies so have to go for a slightly subtler technique.

I’d add that you don’t have to explain, defend, or justify yourself to some random on the internet who’s somehow made it your problem that you didn’t instantly come up with a comedy screenplay response to a dickhead comment. Jesus.

Most real people get caught off guard, have times where we’re not fully paying attention to something said in the moment but doesn’t sit right on reflection.

In any event, it’s not likely you could’ve said anything the waiter would’ve heard even if you’d raised it before you left. We all know it’s a bit dick’ish thing he wouldn’t say to a man, but more likely he’d have spat in your food or said he was only joking so you were wise not to say anything at all.

More importantly OP, did you get your BL discount still? 😅

Totally agree @RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie , this is absolutely ridiculous