It's not "passed" or "passed away", it's "died"

[SherlockHolmes]

So sick of this euphemism being used everywhere. It's not factual - no one has passed anywhere, they're dead.

I get it if it's someone close to you and you can't bring yourself to actually mention death, but it's being used in news reports etc. Utterly ridiculous.

Agree. I think it helps to be direct with children so they understand what’s been said, but again it’s absolutely none of my business and I would never police how people talk about death.

It's wrong because it's confusing.

I know of someone who, whenever any uses that word, wants to ask 'passed their driving test?' Passed an exam?

Nope! Depends on context.

@SherlockHolmes Why on earth are you getting worked up about a euphemism for death? And the oldest euphemism in the English language at that, dating back to the 15th Century, so it's been around for a heck of a lot longer than you. 😂Many people can't deal with the word 'death' and none of us knows who can and who can't, so using this term is a gentler, more polite way of referring to it. I would always prefer to say 'died', but I'm mindful of other people's feelings. It's hardly the end of the world, is it?

I think if someone is talking about their personal experience it’s fine but if they are communicating information clear factual language is best. I’m overly sensitive perhaps as I’m autistic and can struggle with woolly language. I remember being very confused when my grandfather passed when I was a child because I was told with phrases like “there was nothing more they could do” “his time had come” it may be hard to say but some people may struggle to get the meaning of you avoid using the word they expect for such news

But the 'word police' have been inflicting 'passed' on everyone else!

The word is 'died'.

Why are we so afraid of saying it?

I don’t see it as incorrect. The person has passed into a new state - from being alive to being dead. They have passed through that final human experience. It makes sense to me

I think this is an unkind thread. People deal with death in their own way, they can use whatever terminology they wish to.

Are you the same poster who started this exact thread last week and got deleted?

I think OP lacks empathy for the bereaved.

This. ⬆️

what does it matter what words people are using? If you’re having a serious or essential conversion that involves death, dying etc, you use whichever word is appropriate at that time, with that particular person.
I don’t care if it’s not the ‘correct’ word (as defined by you)
I have been widowed twice … So you won’t be telling me what to say after what I’ve been through, and it’s rather rude to think you can.
Leave people alone, they’ll sort it out for themselves.

It's whatever the fuck the person mourning someone they loved wants to call it.

The media such as TV and print, ought to use the right word.

If Aunt Sally is in tears and tells you Uncle Fed has 'passed' that's up to her, but as far as formal speech and written language goes, the euphemism shouldn't be used.

I don’t generally use ‘passed away’ but I was surprised that I found quite difficult to say that my mum had died for the first few months. I really hate ‘passed’ - it’s nonsensical. And I agree with others about ‘unalive’.

No one has said it's a dirty word. 🤦‍♀️

We're not talking about individuals. It's about the corruption of English where a US import is becoming everyday speech and in writing too.

'Passed' implies moving from one side to another.
If you're an atheist it is irrelevant.

Me and my dad shared the same humour, when the undertaker turned up and started saying passed, I said it a jocular way, you mean brown bread, dead, he's an ex dad... carried on in many python esque fashion with dear dad sadly, well dead, on the bed. Had he been alive he would have bean roaring with laughter.

He died at 3.00 in the afternoon, by the time the doctor had been it was after 5.00 and when I rang the undertaker they said it was £200 extra to collect between 5 PM & 9 AM, so I said no worries leave him here overnight, he's less trouble to look after in this state! again it was lost on them.

Popped his ashes in the general rubbish bin as per his request - as he said what else do you do with ashes, same as the log burner! he was a real laugh, and so very practical.

I agree. Wasn't it the case that the Victorian euphemism 'fell asleep' (you see it on old gravestones) caused some children to fear going to bed?! It's odd how many people seem to struggle with calling death what it is, there seems to be no such squeamishness about calling birth by the right name and they are both unavoidable parts of life.

Love it.
My dad wanted to be buried in the garden but we were worried about the house sale afterwards .

Totally agree.

I think there are times when it’s necessary to be really clear that someone is dead, and to use that term but in most instances I see the term ‘passed sway’ as being softer, kinder.

This. Let people use the language they find easiest to express what has happened at a very difficult time. Policing or judging the vocabulary choice of the bereaved makes you far more cringeworthy than people who say passed or passed away or passed on.

Yes, but as someone said upthread, it is important to be really clear and unambiguous, and when I was telephoned out of the blue one Saturday morning by my 18 year-old goddaughter's mother who used the words "Sarah has left us" I wasn't sure whether I had actually understood the message. Unfortunately, I had....... but I sprinted straight across to her house to find out what exactly was going on.

It's interesting how many people use 'fuck' as every other word, when they mean 'very or really' - when I was a child using that word was a hanging offence and my mum still finds it appalling.

But we did say 'died' !

I work in a funeral home, we use ‘passed away’ often when talking with loved ones, because it’s about softening the blow and ensuring the language we use isn’t
austere and lacking empathy. ‘Died’ is also fine, but it depends on who you are talking to. Reading your audience is everything.

If that stuff doesn’t matter we could just say ‘I’m sorry to hear your loved one snuffed in a car crash over the weekend’.