Gave cpr. Not heard anything from the victim. Is it ok to feel a little sad?

[Rizzlekicks123]

Never posted before but was hoping for either some moral support.

I gave cpr recently to a neighbour (who I don't know but who mutual friends do). I am not a medic and havent had formal training. Just online reading. The woman lived and is going to be ok (thank goodness). The thing that is upsetting me is that she hasn't reached out despite knowing how to find me. She owes me nothing and I'd do the same again if I was faced with it, but I feel so sad that the trauma I experienced has not been acknowledged. I dont want anything other than a "are you ok" It was so stressful. Aibu?

I have watched my husband in cardiac arrest and also watched cpr. It is truly shocking and I ended up with ptsd. Anyone on this thread who doesn’t have sympathy for you as well the lady you saved have no idea what they are talking about. Join Chain of Survival on FB. Also if resuscitation took a while know that your neighbour may have memory loss and a brain injury which is very common after resuscitation because of hypoxia. Take it easy, see your GP and I recommend cbt for any anxiety. There will be a reason why the lady hasn’t thanked you and it won’t be lack of gratitude. Well done for saving a life!

@Breathein I watched my son being worked on by an ambulance crew. Not for a heart issue but a prolonged seizure. It is very scary. And although OP wasn’t seeing a loved one in danger, she was taking responsibility. So like you I can completely empathise. I think some folk are lucky and perhaps haven’t seen stuff

This 100%
No offense.... this is not about you.

I've seen a lot of stuff, including my son have a cardiac arrest which went on for an agonising 20 minutes followed by 7 weeks in intensive care and a cancer diagnosis just 1 week after his cardiac arrest. He was in hospital for 10 months in total and is now disabled.

I understand that OP is traumatised and I understand that she wants closure but none of that can be put onto the patient who is still going through her own trauma and potentially still having issues with her health.

But why be so harsh to someone who saved another person's life?

All anyone needs to say is that she is probably still recovering from the experience (physically and mentally) and if the OP needs support she needs to find it from other people - eg the organisation you did your first aid course with may be able to help. Or find a mental health first aider.

I think you were amazing OP. Some of the comments on here are entitled and nasty. Just no need for it when a stranger has been incredibly kind to another person and is now dealing with the trauma.
the paramedic who posted - you are very kind.

I fell over once whilst exercising. I was concussed. I am so very grateful to the strangers who stopped what they were doing and helped me. I did manage to thank one person a few months later.

Let’s be kind. A stranger saved a life. What an incredible amazing thing. I’m not sure what I would do in that situation but lots of people would not step up. Sad.

This thread is quite funny.

I always wondered if I would do the right thing if I needed to save a life but now I know if I did I wouldn't mention it on Mumsnet because I'd be subject to abuse.

Like saying to some star, well, why should people say how great your record/ book/movie is, I mean you got paid didn't you, you utter bastard.

I definitely got that you needed closure from your post. I didn’t get the “me me me” thing that others have interpreted it as. Maybe they’ve thankfully not been there and therefore don’t understand. Unfortunately people get thrown to the wolves on here. Fair play on the mouth to mouth too - we don’t do that bit! I can see how it would be grim though.

Rewind is defo worth it. Therapy techniques are horses for courses a lot of the time, but it has helped me and many others deal with horrible incidents. Best of luck and never stop feeling proud for your actions that day. Seeing people who jump in to help and just getting on with it before we get there really warms my soul! ❤️

I haven’t read the whole thread but I knew on reading the OP how some would interpret it.

The fact is that what you have been through is traumatic, OP. You saw someone nearly die and had to intervene in a real, physical way. Loads of people like to think they would help but the truth is not everyone is a rescuer. You are, and you might need a bit of help processing what happened.

As far as your neighbour is concerned what took place only happened to her. And on one level she is not wrong, but it did happen to you too.