Furious at DH and his friend bringing someone back to our house

[TiredSaturdayy]

My DH’s friend is staying for the weekend. He lives about 4 hours away and they only see each other once a year. This is perfectly fine with me as I usually get on well with him.

Last night, they both went out into town to catch up. DH got into bed about 1am, I sleep lightly so was woken but soon got to sleep. His friend is staying in our spare bedroom.

I am woken by noises shortly after. I wake DH and ask if he can hear them. He says there’s something he needs to tell me and that his friend met a women in the last bar they were in and INVITED HER HOME! So the noises were infact them ‘at it’ in my spare bedroom.

I go ballistic at DH and ask why he thought this was acceptable. Our DC is away this weekend which is beyond the point. Completely irresponsible to allow a stranger into our house in those circumstances.

I tell DH that if he doesn’t ask her to leave then I will. He says he’ll message his friend. No reply. He’s about to get up and knock on the door when we hear it open and his friend sees her out and she eventually leaves.

DH is asleep still now, I am downstairs absolutely aghast at their behaviour. If he thinks I am sorting out the fry up they kept on about before they went out then they’ve another thing coming.

Oh, she was ‘insistent’ was she? Of course, doesn’t she have her own house if she lives locally. And your husband just made polite chit chat with the other woman all night?
How weird for 2 friends having a long overdue catch up.
He’d not be staying at my house again.

Well next time he stays, I'd insist it's in a hotel. That is beyond grim and I'd make sure that he deals with the bedding. What the hell was he thinking? And he needs to cut back on the drink if that's how it affects him.

It’s THING.

Grammar Police here - to serve and correct.

No this is a total violation and I would be furious! You’re not 18 anymore! Unacceptable and I would make my views known at breakfast.

Yeah it’s a bit grim, op, to say the least. I mean, maybe it’s the kind of thing that happened in our house-sharing 20s, but no way not now. Yuk.

I'm in my 50s, and have been saying "thing" for at least 40 years so it's not that new.

I know think is the original version (after a thread on here some years back) but thing is so ingrained, I'm not switching now! And I'm usually a stickler for grammar (I use less and fewer correctly, for example) but think just feels so wrong to me!

Look it up in the big book of bollocks?

In the real world, people go ballistic, lose their shit, lose their rag, shout, get angry, say rude things

Unlike on here where people dont seem human

Yes OP, if ever there was a time to go ballistic, this is it.

Susie Dent says that ‘think’ predates ‘thing’

the woman involved must be local so why couldn’t he go back to her place ? I assume she is married and cheating on her partner. How tragic.
As it’s not his house he is massively taking the piss inviting a woman back , have casual sex if you want but you can do it with respect for the other relationships in your life, he obviously doesn’t appreciate or respect his friendship with your husband or you. Comments about it being a brothel etc are an exaggeration and miss the point about why this behaviour is unacceptable. It’s unacceptable because the basis on which you have invited him to stay is that he is your guest, if he forewarned you that he was looking to have casual sex that night you would have been given a choice about rethinking your invite to him .
Make it clear he is not welcome at your house again. My partner has a friend who is a very good looking guy ( in a relationship with a baby) he has done this type of stuff to other friends he is an entitled arrogant prick unfortunately women generally drop their knickers for him so he thinks this is normal, he doesn’t see how cringe and desperate for sex it seems . As adults we are not teenagers who have to sneak about finding a place for sex . Your husband sounds a bit enthralled to this guy , remind him that you’re not living in an episode of men behaving badly . Try not to be angry as you will lose the power of the objections you are raising which I think are very justified!

@ThatsCute needs a new job.

I'm amazed at the number of "cool" posters who think it's OK.

I wouldn't go ballistic, but I would think a lot less of both of them for taking my hospitality for granted. I would also ask the "guest" to strip the bed and load the washing machine when he is ready for going home.

Is he staying tonight?

This.

That makes no sense.

If you THINK [xxxx] then you've got another THINK coming. That makes sense.

If you THINK [xxxx] then you've got another THING coming. That makes no sense. What kind of Thing is coming?

You should be aware that your husband was on the pull with his friend. The woman was definitely out with a female friend or group of women. This was no passing conversation involving the woman and the male friend

You should not be kicking out a lone female who is possibly drunk or under the influence of drugs into the night. I find her apparent willingness to go home with a random pair of men a red flag for reduced cognitive ability. You should have intervened and ascertained her ability to consent. Then if you understandably did not want your home used as a knocking shop, ensured your husband's friend delivered her home.

I would be looking at my husband with fresh eyes if I were you. It sounds like he's reverting to type.

@TiredSaturdayy waa this women out alone ? I’d think not . What was your dh doing while this women was being chatted up and “pulled” by his mate ?
So the men don’t go out to enjoy each others company and a pint. Their nighy out is focused around women.

That in itself would be enough for me.

I looked it up and every page I've looked at says it's think.

https://www.vocabulary.com/articles/pardon-the-expression/another-think-coming-vs-another-thing-coming/

https://proofed.co.uk/writing-tips/idiom-tips-another-think-coming-or-another-thing-coming/

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/have-another-think-coming

No, its not

You have another think coming, ie you have misunderstood or got it wrong and need to think again

(sorry OP)

1. I love how this has turned into a grammar thread.
2. As a guest, it is wholly inappropriate to invite others into the home.
3. They should have gone to her house/a hotel to shag.
4. He’d better be putting those sheets into the wash and not leaving you to do it, OP!

You have husband issues!

It’s really disrespectful, and I’d be annoyed. The friend is a guest in your home- if he wants the freedom to invite whoever he pleases into his bed, then he needs a hotel.

There’s clearly a security risk when strangers come into your home. The fact that the woman shares acquaintances with your family perhaps reduces the risk of theft etc, but makes things very awkward for you.

They’d be sorting their own breakfast if I were in your shoes, and they’d be cleaning the kitchen after. Though I suspect they’ll go out.

No it really isnt.

I'd hate this too OP!
It's so disrespectful and gross.
Make sure the friend or your husband is the one changing and washing the sheets!

I would be annoyed by this.

Just the fact of bringing a stranger into your house when you are kindly letting him stay. Unacceptable.

AI !!!

As if people get accurate information from AI and if they think that, theyve got another think coming!