Furious at DH and his friend bringing someone back to our house

[TiredSaturdayy]

My DH’s friend is staying for the weekend. He lives about 4 hours away and they only see each other once a year. This is perfectly fine with me as I usually get on well with him.

Last night, they both went out into town to catch up. DH got into bed about 1am, I sleep lightly so was woken but soon got to sleep. His friend is staying in our spare bedroom.

I am woken by noises shortly after. I wake DH and ask if he can hear them. He says there’s something he needs to tell me and that his friend met a women in the last bar they were in and INVITED HER HOME! So the noises were infact them ‘at it’ in my spare bedroom.

I go ballistic at DH and ask why he thought this was acceptable. Our DC is away this weekend which is beyond the point. Completely irresponsible to allow a stranger into our house in those circumstances.

I tell DH that if he doesn’t ask her to leave then I will. He says he’ll message his friend. No reply. He’s about to get up and knock on the door when we hear it open and his friend sees her out and she eventually leaves.

DH is asleep still now, I am downstairs absolutely aghast at their behaviour. If he thinks I am sorting out the fry up they kept on about before they went out then they’ve another thing coming.

No, it’s “another think coming”.

The clue is in the first part of the phrase - “if you THINK that, you’ve got another THINK coming.

It’s deliberately incorrect English for the purpose of humour. From a time when word plays like this were much more common in popular culture.

This is one of the few topics where No Debate is actually valid, or even essential. If you think it’s “thing”, you’re just ill-informed and wrong. Sorry.

(yes, I know, not the point of the thread)

I don’t want to wake up middle of the night to god knows who having sex in my house! Unacceptable.

Has no one on this thread ever had consensual sex in a bed that isn't there's? Ever??

Oh Ive never heard what life has install for them before, thats fabulous, but surely that is an excellent or eggcelent eggcorn, because life is awaiting the next installment?

I think OP is completely correct in her response. Her DH sounds pretty chill so likely that’s the kind of intensity of reaction that’s probably needed to really get her disapproval across so don’t at all think it’s OTT. As for the friend, extremely disrespectful to bring a stranger to someone else home for a ONS 🤦🏻‍♀️. Like if so desperate for it then go to the strangers home or find a hotel and do the walk of shame back to your mates the next day!

That's 100% not going to happen is it. Im sure the 2 blokes think it's hilarious.

So did he get a bit of a kick out of hearing his friend with a woman he had only just met screwing in your spare room? Was he imagining it was him? He sounds as pervy as his friend.

More likely sobered up and thought “what the fuck am I doing?”

I am not wedded to either version. Both can work? So ‘thing’ in my simple mind might work like this. ‘If you think I am making your breakfast you have another thing coming’. The ‘thing’ resulting from the wrongful thought (think) being that you will have to make your own breakfast? Quickly ducks below the parapet.

Why didn't they just go to a hotel?
OP would probably have found that funny

Being upset and annoyed is fine, ballistic and aghast is possibly a bit much. If your children were there it would be worse, but it's still not really on. However, I presume your DH said all was fine so it's not really guest's fault

I don't know - what does happen? I really don't see what you're driving at. Or why it would make it disrespectful for the man to go along with something the woman wants to do.

Sorry to continue the grammar de-rail: Just on the “thing/think” point: for me, it’s definitely think (grew up in Midlands, have lived in London since mid-90s) as the examples show - “if you think you can bring home unexpected house guests, you’ve got another think coming”. Just as we might say, for example, “you might want to have a think about that”.

But “think” is rarely used as a noun (the usual thinking-related noun is “thought”). Think is generally used as a verb. I think that’s what the people who think it’s another “thing” coming are responding to because the word “another” is naturally followed by a noun not a verb.

Many Americanisms seem a bit odd to me ie “I could care less” instead of “I couldn’t care less” and “tidbit” instead of “titbit” (experience has taught me that sounds quite rude to Americans). I also remember some elderly friends at a wedding being slightly stunned when an American friend referred to her fanny.

It is used as a noun, thats the point. I need to have a think about this.

Gross. I absolutely would not be washing that bedding. DH or his lovely friend can do it. Wouldn't make their breakfast, either, and I'd be seriously considering not having this friend to stay again unless DH has clearly absorbed the message that this was unacceptable and cannot ever be repeated. If you want to have a ONS, book a hotel room or something. You don't bring random strangers into someone else's home. How very disrespectful!

I wouldn’t allow it in my home whether the DC were home or not I have standards and morals that woman he brought back clearly doesn’t have any YANBU

@soupyspoon - I know it’s being used as a noun and to me it’s clear that the word is think. But I think a lot of people don’t hear “think” as a noun, and therefore default to “thing”. It’s just a theory - I may well be wrong.

Yes I think thats not how its happening. Its because people mishear it and dont see things written down enough.

Youve got another thin kcoming

Thats how its become confused to the ear, the words roll into each other as normal speech does this all the time, so the 'k' sound at the start of coming, is assumed to be the start of coming. Not the end of think.

So people think its 'youve got another thing coming'

Thats whats happened.

Just to add I dont think the average person walks around interpreting phrases according to word being a noun or verb or whatnot. Its how we hear things that tells us what they are.

Hence so many hilarious signs for chester draws etc

So why didn’t they go back to the friends house and shag

You have a husband problem. I willing to bet this is only the most recent of issues he has cause with or without his "friends".

@soupyspoon - I spend my whole time thinking about whether words are nouns or verbs 😀… But yes, I think you’re probably right about how it came about.

Why are you blaming the woman? She couldn't know the friend didn't live there. She probably thought it was his place and that he was sharing it with OP's husband, rather than a family home.

The husband and the "friend" are the only ones to blame here.

If he hasn't already left, he strips the bed sheets and pops everything in the washing machine for you.

That's grim and a complete lack of respect for your home !