Class rep didn't include all kids names in the end of year card

[Whydiddnt]

Aibu to be mortified?

The class rep organised a whip around for the end of term teacher gift. Not everyone chipped in for various reasons however, the vast majority did.

I've just found out that the rep only listed the children whom contributed in the card, instead of writing it from the full class.

Is it just me that finds this mean and horrible? Why would anyone leave out a couple of children who's parents probably couldn't afford to chip in.

It wouldn't have taken any extra effort to address the gift from the whole class. It's not the children's fault that their parents couldn't afford it. I really hope those poor kids were none of the wiser.

I googled...
There are 163 state grammar schools in England.
There are approximately 15 private schools in England they have the word "Grammar" in their name that were previously direct-grant grammar schools but became private schools after the direct-grant scheme was abolished in the 1970s.
Which are the "so-called grammar schools" that are fee paying that you are referring too?

Make life easier and get an online card organised, send the link to the class group on WhatsApp/whatever and those that can’t be arsed to do a message/attach a photo just won’t be included

Simple

Or just have the card say "From all in Blue Class"
Even simpler.

I’m the class rep. Did the usual whip around. A few parents didn’t contribute for whatever reason - no biggie

I made sure all kids names were on the card and they signed it

This is how it's always worked. If you contribute your name goes in. If you don't it doesn't.

The card is from the children though.
None of them actually contributes.

Actually my insomnia has come up with the perfect solution.
Each class gives a card from all the children (no specific names signed - just "from everyone in whatever class").
The cost for these cards comes from the PTA funds. Cards can be usually be bought for less than £3.
If it's a 3 class per year school that's 21 classes.
21 × £3 is £63.
£63 out of the PTA funds is a tiny amount if it's a decent PTA.
There does not need to be a class gift.
So - no one has to donate specifically towards a card. The money will come out from the pot that was raised by the cake sales/Christmas fairs/summer fetes etc.

Sorted 😁

Yep. Social norm, harms nobody at all.

So your issue is not with which names are on the card but with the students knowing which names are on the card.

We provided a card that all of the children signed. Everyone was given the opportunity to contribute to a voucher for the CT or do their own thing. There was a separate card for the voucher which the children did not sign but the list of contributing families was given - I have no problem with this at all 🤷🏻‍♀️

As a class rep I keep it as simple as possible and don't get annoyed at all by not tracking who or hasn't contributed and just signing the card myself "from all of X class".

Least effort and least annoyance

£25 per child?! I bet teachers are queuing up at your school for a job!

So, you don’t really think you are being unreasonable OP?

Average for ours seems to be £10. Tho odd one gives £20 and some give £5

so evens out

usually around 270/300 - split 3/4 ways depending on how many teachers :job share and ta

£25 per child for a teacher present is ridiculous. One difficult year I could barely afford £25 for my own kids at Christmas. It could also mean the difference of feeding the family or not for many familys. Most teachers would rather have no present than do this to a family. It doesn't matter how much notice you give, if they carnt afford it they carnt afford it and it's horrendous when class reps demand it

£25 is ridiculous.
That's around the same amount I spend on my own mother as a birthday present.
Do people really pay that much ?
Well....if they can afford it then that's their choice and as long as the gift is actually something you know 100% the teacher will want and use.
I just think of a thread from either last year or the year before about a teacher who was given an expensive food and drink hamper - except it was full of food she was allergic too and alcohol she didn't drink.
What a ridiculous waste of money.
Despite what some people on this thread think there ARE actually some children in homes that don't have paper and crayons to make a homemade card. Perhaps £24 should go to a charity that will help them and £1 towards a card and gift.

I agree it's a lot of money

But why do you think you should be able to tell people that they should give money to charity instead of them buying someone a gift?

I think I must be wired differently to other people.

Well they don't have to give to charity.
Of course not.
As I said - their money their choice.
If they want to give £25 towards a gift up to them.
I just hope the gift is something the teacher actually wants/likes 😂

@LetsGoRoundAgainAgain What's amusing is I have a sneaking suspicion that those that give £25 are the same ones who say things like "I'd rather give a set 50 quid to the PTA each year than have to buy cakes from the cake sale or (horror) go to the Christmas fair.
Most PTAs are actually registered charities 😂😂😂

I’ve been the mother of primary aged children for 12 years of my life so far and I am so grateful I have never experienced class WhatsApp groups, class reps, organised collections for the teacher etc. I’ve loved a charmed life! 🤣

Should say LIVED a charmed life! I’ve experienced two different primaries as well.

Teacher here. If I received a card with names missing I would realise why. It’s not a big deal.

Nobody is obligated to contribute to a class present or to buy a present, make a card, buy a card or anything. Some people simply might not like you! 😂 It’s a non-issue and I really wouldn’t wind yourself up about it.

Yes, I wouldn't care if they were none of the wiser. I didn't want them to know they were left out.

It's not a nice feeling being singled out like that.

This post has gone a little weird and i'm guessing last night's posters had one too many judging by the aggressive posting styles.

It's a pretty even split with the poll so we can all agree to disagree.

Thank you to the portion of posters that could recognise this was about empathy for the children and not about what the parents want.

Oh come on. All they need is a piece of paper and pen!

Op I think you are overthinking this. Teacher won't care or notice either way.

Do you really think if the class rep asked everyone for contributions that all of those that didn't contribute couldn't afford £1 to chip in? I doubt it. They likely chose not to take part - it's their decision. In our class we have about 3 who choose not to opt in as they like to give the teacher something home made, which is up to them.

As for the children feeling singled out, it's the responsibility of their parent to arrange a leaving card/letter/gift isn't it? You can't really blame the class rep. If I didn't arrange a gift for my child that would be on me.

But like I said I doubt anyone even noticed there were names missing!