Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Devastated - can't believe my builder did this

583 replies

INFJismyvibe · 24/07/2025 04:57

Bit of backstory - we've been having an extension done on the house, it's taken well over the agreed time (almost a year over) but we've been mainly patient about it. Builders have been dumping stuff in our garden, making it unusable for the most part. Everything was overgrown as I've been unable to mow the lawn or trim down the bushes, but I've been OK with that. I knew that once they cleared their crap from the garden, I could get back to gardening and sort it out. My garden had some beautiful, well established plants and fruit trees, and some taller bushes that worked as an extra privacy screen, which we really need from our neighbours. Without those, the neighbours can see into my kitchen.

Some of the plants were of sentimental value, gifts from my mum, a plum tree growing from a cutting that my aunt gave me, from my grandma's garden, etc.

The building work has meant I've been unable to use my garden - which was my sanctuary - this summer and last summer.

Anyway, on to current day.
I've been away on holiday with my (older) kids. Dh stayed home for various reasons.

Builder has been in, finishing up on the house. His dad came along (he sometimes helps builder out on projects) and asked Dh if he's OK to clear the garden. Dh naturally assumed he meant all their builder's mess - bags of cement, wood palettes, etc etc. I've been saying for a while that I can't wait for all that to go so that I can tidy up the garden and even be able to access the washing line again.
So Dh said yes please clear it up, and then left for work.

The guy brought in a team of men and they removed everything. Every single plant, bush, tree. Completely removed the lawn (which, to be fair, was riddled with weeds and needed returfing anyway).

But it's completely bare.

All my beautiful beautiful plants, my sentimental ones, my privacy ones. All gone.

Dh didn't tell me until the car journey home as he didn't want to ruin my holiday. But i've just returned home a couple of hours ago, and I'm absolutely devastated. Don't even care about the rest of the work thats been done while I was gone. Struggling to even talk to Dh about holiday or anything else. Completely ruined my return home.

I know some may say, ah it's just plants.... But they cost so much money and effort and time, and can't be replaced just like that. I'm going to have to spend hundreds to fill it up again, and it's going to take years for them to establish. And it needs so much extra work and attention now.

Gutted. Aibu for feeling this way.

Any advice? What do I say to the builder? Dh didn't say anything at the time as he hates confrontation but wtaf?!! And now the builder will think I'm being unreasonable. But it was my sanctuary, my space, my privacy.

Ps please forgive any spelling errors, I've barely slept.
.

OP posts:
GiantMoa · 05/08/2025 10:08

@INFJismyvibe Ignore the troll, there are some very strange people out there. Glad you're at least getting reimbursed and can start planning your new garden.

TonTonMacoute · 05/08/2025 10:09

INFJismyvibe · 04/08/2025 20:07

Hope you still manage to get your woodland garden!

The bluebells and primroses I had planted pre-builders all came up this spring. The power of nature!

Agapornis · 05/08/2025 12:02

Meant to add, go two tone for the full beach house shed effect, I went with white for the door & window frames and fascia boards. I also replace the hinges and lock with brass ones.

INFJismyvibe · 05/08/2025 12:15

TonTonMacoute · 05/08/2025 10:09

The bluebells and primroses I had planted pre-builders all came up this spring. The power of nature!

Ooh bet that looked gorgeous! Happy for you x

OP posts:
INFJismyvibe · 05/08/2025 12:16

Agapornis · 05/08/2025 12:02

Meant to add, go two tone for the full beach house shed effect, I went with white for the door & window frames and fascia boards. I also replace the hinges and lock with brass ones.

Edited

That sounds amazing!

OP posts:
AprilShowers25 · 05/08/2025 12:55

Decafcoflove · 04/08/2025 16:30

something so so important that absolutely everyone you know, everyone, no matter how tenuous the link, knows about this favourite garden feature

and yet you agreed to your garden being used as a builder’s dumping ground for a long time, becoming largely “unusable”

Goodness, you really cherished it.

She means anyone who has seen her garden would know, not anyone who she has ever met.

ilovesushi · 11/08/2025 12:49

Hope your garden isn't looking too depressing at the moment Op. If it is can you get yourself some lovely flowers in pots/ containers to add some colour and joy? x

INFJismyvibe · 11/08/2025 12:56

ilovesushi · 11/08/2025 12:49

Hope your garden isn't looking too depressing at the moment Op. If it is can you get yourself some lovely flowers in pots/ containers to add some colour and joy? x

I've been buying up some half price plants and getting them in, so it's looking much more cheerful now, than it a did a few weeks ago. Got some beautiful trees too, so hopefully by next summer, it should all be looking lovely 😊

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page