Fiance slept with a prostitute

[Adviceneededrewedding]

Don’t know what to do or think.

Last night my fiance told me slept with a prostitute a couple of weeks ago after a work night out.

Basically, went out for work drinks and ended up getting paralytic, a work friend said to him I’ve got someone I want you to meet it’s a good business lead etc. They turn up at the house and partner is confused because there’s only girls there and there is a bed in the room. Work friend starts negotiating prices and partner then realises it’s a brothel. Said he started freaking out saying wtf are you doing this isn’t right etc. Work friend/ prostitues say to him this is normal everyone does it and he says they convince him to do it. He said the girl took his trousers down put on condom and they had sex for 30 seconds then he said no I can’t do this and ran out of the house and made his way home.

Broke down crying to me about this last night saying he’s so sorry and he can’t believe he’s done this and he’s never once been in a situation where he’s been close to cheating so can’t believe he was stupid enough to let himself get into this mess.

I’m in shock tbh I would never have expected this from him he is usually a really genuine moral person with really strong family/ relationship values. He said he will never do anything like this again and will not ever get himself in a state like that again.

Dont know what to do, we’re supposed to be getting married in 6 months. Other than this he has never done anything cheating wise etc he absolutely hates cheating. Am I being really naive to forgive him? I love him and I don’t want to throw away our relationship over a stupid drunken mistake if he will genuinely never do it again. I also can’t look at him and can’t imagine ever having sex with him again.

need some other opinions don’t want to tell anyone in my personal life.

This.

Oh dear. You're being played. I'll hazard a guess that it was only 30 seconds because he finished that quickly.
If he's that gormless to be tricked into staying in a brothel and using a woman there, then he'll still be gormless enough to do it again one day. Remember the key fact, he was NOT forced to do it. He had a choice, and he chose to cheat on you.

What a load of fucking bullshit. His mate took him to visit a "business associate" but to his horror there were girls and a bed in the room! I'm surprised he didn't faint with shock and need smelling salts to bring him round. He was then forced to wear a condom and have sex, but freaked out and ran away. Oh dear OP. Men are full of such outrageous shit. He was right up for it, he's done it before and he'll do it again. He's only confessed because somehow this is likely to come out before the wedding. The poor soul hates cheating does he? Leave him now, or learn the hard way.

This is about one step removed from "I slipped and fell into her vagina." He's insulting your intelligence.

Oh op you just can’t stay. How can you marry someone in 6 months you can’t even bare to be near you right now? He fucked it, there is better out there… go.

everyone does it and he says they convince him to do it.🙄

Dont know what to do,🙄🙄

Please please please dont go ahead with this. You wouldnt have fallen in love with the man he's just told you about. That's who he is. Not who you think he is.

Was it hard before she even removed his trousers or how did she put a condom on him? What a ridiculous story 😂😂

Oh come on OP you don’t believe this fairy story do you?

Your fiancé is a lying cheating piece of shit scumbag who pays to use women’s bodies for his own selfish gratification. Men like him are repulsive.

But as others say I suspect you’ll ignore your gut and all advice, marry the prick and be back on a couple of years when he turns out to be a serial cheat.

My husband says your fella is lying:
"If you're that pissed that you don't know where you're being taken, then there's no way you could get it up enough for someone to put a condom on it.
If he could get it up, he wasn't that pissed."

I say ditch him now to preserve your dignity and stop you spending your life worrying every time he goes out with his "friends".

If this is true then you’re the most gullible person I’ve ever heard of.

None of that happened.

He by himself, decided to visit a prostitute, found one, visited her and had sex with her, with no other person involved.

I would actually be more pissed off with the lies that he’s told acting like I’m stupid, than the actual act itself.

Tbf I suppose he didn't need to tell you

Oh, he did. No man admits stuff like this until he's about to be found out somehow.

Possibly, but that's the bit missing from OP

Ex fiance and he not told you the full story

I bet you have to put loads of effort to even get him to do the bins but one bad man and a mean lady can convince him to get hard and have sex even when he absolutely doesn’t want to at all ever.

I'll echo the other posters....he's only told you as he is getting ahead of the game by telling you first in case it comes out.

I'd be more annoyed that he thinks I'd believe such a load of crap in the first place. It's all 'poor me'. He has taken zero responsibility for his actions.

It's not the first time and it won't be the last. You'll always have it in the back of your mind and your spidey senses will be screaming at you when he's out.

Cut your loses and live a beautiful and peaceful like. Men like this will only drag you down to the gutter with them.

Fuck him and his fuckin friend.

I don't believe his version of events. It paints him in the best light while letting him confess his guilty conscience.

@Adviceneededrewedding do you really and truly believe that this man was taken there against his will and forced into a situation where a sex worker sexually assaulted him? Because that’s the only way this story makes any sense. If that’s true then he deserves support and sympathy and he should consider taking action.

I think it’s entirely possible he got a minute in to having sex and freaked out and left but in that scenario he still willingly got that far and is now feeling guilty.
Frankly that would be too late for me because he still did it.

It’s not even that he cheated which I might be willing to forgive but that he willingly had sex with a sex worker and has no idea whether she has been exploited, coerced or even trafficked.

Is it possible that this is going to come out somehow and he’s laying the ground to prepare you for it?

Do you really want to sit there in your wedding dress knowing he fucked someone else, and not only that, visited a prostitute after getting down on one knee? And probably a load of his mates in the room knowing about it too while he stands there and does his meaningless speech about how much he loves you?

leave and don’t look back. You deserve better than this - everyone deserves better than this, it’s not even bare minimum.

"Work friend/ prostitues say to him this is normal everyone does it and he says they convince him to do it."
Convince? How could they possibly convince someone "with really strong family/ relationship values" that this is "normal"? Paralytic or not, having been taken there under false pretences I really don't see how he can have been 'convinced'.

I'm more inclined to think he decided to take the opportunity presented to him.

I'm also questioning the timing of his confession. This happened "a couple of weeks ago after a work night out". So why wait until now to tell you? I wonder if his work colleague is about to drop him in it.

What do you mean you don't know what to do?

It would be time to sell my bargepole, because I wouldn't be touching him with one.

This!

He is only telling you the basic betrayal as he doesn't want anyone else to tell you. He could have said to his 'mate' No, I'm going home

You do realise a condom will not fit a flaccid penis @Adviceneededrewedding