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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel traumatised that ex wanted to give me 'one last nice week'

153 replies

LorettaYoung · 18/07/2025 11:59

By this I mean we spent an amazing week together ahead of the break up and a month later during the break up I queried how we'd just had an amazing time together and he said 'I wanted to give you one last nice week together'.

I think back on that week. How he stocked up his fridge with all my favourite things. Also sexually he'd always been very vanilla and not wanting to try new things, but suddenly he said he wanted to do those things that week. Which we did. I keep thinking about those moments and how vulnerable I was and angry that he was plotting the break up the whole time.

I remember we watched a movie where the lead guy is making the break up long and drawn out, and he said 'well maybe it's ok to not say goodbye immediately sometimes.' I remember thinking WTF.

I feel like he treated me like a dog that was about to get down and feel it is almost a sadistic way to behave? Am I wrong?

OP posts:
MangaMoo · 27/07/2025 17:49

LorettaYoung · 27/07/2025 17:41

@MangaMoo just to say, thank you for the counselling suggestion. I've signed up for my first session next week.

I'm doing no better emotionally and feel stuck in every way. I am always the strong agony aunt in friendships but really don't feel I can get through this all alone.

Am glad you’re looking in to some counselling. Hopefully it will help put this horrible experience behind you and then you can move forward with purpose. So sorry that this has happened to you x

thatsalad · 29/07/2025 11:00

LorettaYoung · 27/07/2025 17:41

@MangaMoo just to say, thank you for the counselling suggestion. I've signed up for my first session next week.

I'm doing no better emotionally and feel stuck in every way. I am always the strong agony aunt in friendships but really don't feel I can get through this all alone.

Well done on starting counselling❤

Leolion09 · 29/07/2025 15:04

Well done on starting counselling hopefully it will help you.
I also had an ex do the same thing to me and then when we were breaking up exclaimed we had not had sex in ages... when it had been days, I thought I was going mad.

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