To be angry

[Guinesss]

So all of my family are going to Oasis for my mums but I couldn’t go due to childcare, I would feel so bad as a parent leaving one of my children out and would probably not go myself. Maybe I am just being selfish and bitter because I am jealous.

You're an adult not a child , not their fault you can't get childcare and yes youre just butter because of jealousy

OP you’ve done right putting it all in a box. Sorry but your parents once you’re self sufficient owe you hee-haw. All else is a bonus. This is their first time living too. Yes… ‘course woulda in an ideal world been lovely if folk had acted/reacted how you’d of liked but really, any of us can get knocked down tomorrow. Be gracious and let them enjoy. Sure in 10, 20, 30 years… might be your Kids bemoaning you are going to a concert without them. If so hoping you’ll have the sense to in essence say cry me a river and remember like your folks probs had times like now where you missed out. Imho you’re directing your frustration in wrong direction… your folks have earned a break. All very well being pious saying you’d never do it, but how many 30, 40, 50 year olds you’ve sired in your charge!? Be excited for them having tickets 🎟️, grow up a good bit and 💯 support them living their best life whilst they’re here…

Honestly thinks this thread wins for the most batshit, self important whinge ever!
Wahhhh my mums going to a gig for a band I don't like...why am I not being centered by everyone?!!
Waahhh!! My ex likes this band too, how dare he get tickets for them and not put me first!! Even though he's loved them for 20+ years and I don't like them, I should be seeing them not him!!
How vacuous and self important!!

You are being unreasonable wanting to go to that anyhow imho 😂

This is really unreasonable, no one should of offered you there ticket, not to mention they were hugely expensive. They have obviously gone as a group of four, I'm sure you could do something different on a different night for your Mums birthday that includes the kids

OP are you very young or do you have a lot going on atm? Do you normally feel your family exclude you or is it just a one off due circumstances.

Honestly’ you need to grow up. I’m sure your parents missed out on loads of stuff when you were young. It’s their time now. Your time will come.

Misogyny is alive and well on this thread. 🙄

No the OP's ex isn't responsible for HER, but he IS responsible for his children. Obviously preferred to fuck off out to a concert, to being with his children. And in doing so, he made sure the OP - the mother of his children - couldn't go to said concert with her family, which was also a big family celebration. He is absolute, selfish, thoughtless, bell end.

And yes I KNOW he didn't go with her family FFS!

But yeah, he is the arsehole here.

Seriously, this fucking thread. 🙄 No wonder more and more women are choosing to remain child free. When women have children, they get fucked over left right and centre, and come second to EVERYone! (Especially when they have school age children!)

😅.

You're not wrong to feel you're missing out, but YABU to expect them not to go.

Be happy they at least get to go.

That's a bit more nuanced. Why can't you get childcare and also, why is your ex-h going? He's not part of your mum's family! In fact, why isn't he bloody babysitting?

The lack of reading comprehension on this thread is hilarious.

Its not misogyny, it's a contact agreement and in that tonight is not his night with the children.

DD sees her dad every Wednesday and has done for over six years. We agreed that, amongst other things, when we separated.

If I want to go somewhere on a Wednesday then I book it. I don't check with former husband whether he might randomly want to change our contact agreement, because it's HIS night to have her.

If I'd booked to see a band I love with DP, and spent a shit ton of money on the tickets, then former husband asked me to switch the long established night, so he could go, even though he doesn't like them, I'd say no.

It's not misogynistic to make plans in line with a standing contact agreement.

It would be more accurate to say SHE is responsible for her children on this particular day.

But how could he possibly have known that she would want to go, and on a day when it's not his childcare day? And even if he did know, it's ... not his day. I'm sure he really wanted to go, just as OP did?

Honestly, usually I am the hairiest of Feminazis but this is just nuts!

Why on earth is he the arsehole for making plans with his partner on a night he wasn’t scheduled to have the children? Is he supposed to never do anything just in case OP might decide she wants him to step in and take the kids? Thats not how shared custody works and to call me misogynistic for saying so is batshit.

Imagine a thread from his current partner. “DP and I booked tickets to Oasis. They cost an absolute fortune but we’re huge fans and have been looking forward to it for months. Except DP’s ex has now decided she wants to go to the concert herself and she doesn’t like to use babysitters so she’s demanded we cancel so he can look after the kids, even though it’s a night the kids are scheduled to be with her. I’m so disappointed - as it’s her night to have the kids, AIBU to think we shouldn’t have to cancel?”

Everyone here would be saying DP’s ex should get stuffed, and that DP’s ex had no right to make such a demand.

Please, please read the thread…

It's another cancel the cheque 🙄
OP as a pp said I'm shocked they all AND separatly you ex & his company all got tickets! We tried for ages & had multiple people who aren't interested trying ffor us too.. zilch!

Anyway moving forward just stop.. you're moving into martyrdom territory, no one wants or like that

Sorry, missed that. But OP's family simply did not invite her. If I were her I'd make some proper friends - her family don't sound very caring.

But if you dont like Oasis why do you think it is a special occasion?

They are going to see a band you dont like. Its not a birthday, wedding or anniversary!

I thought exactly the same. Centra parcs locally was originally called Oasis.

I’m guessing it’s the fact that she doesn’t like oasis and nothing deeper. It was very hard to get tickets, and they were super expensive,, it probably didn’t occur to them that she’d be interested. Plus the whole childcare thing.

My dad and siblings are into sports and I’m not, they’re forever going to games and matches together without inviting me. I don’t care because it’s not my thing.

But people don't wait to get invited to an Oasis concert?
Millions of people were trying to lay their hands on tickets in a frantic rush when they went on sale.
Op's family are clearly fans, hence spending all that money, and they could only get 4 - just enough.

If Op wanted a ticket, she should have been joining the frenzy, not waiting patiently for an invite.

She's not even a fan of Oasis either.

Whattt? I’m sorry but you have ONE sibbling, a brother, the way you were making this out was that there was a bunch of siblings going with your mother and you were the only one of a gang not asked! It’s your parents and your brother and his gf, 4 people, going to a concert of a band you don’t even enjoy listening to anyway. And then you suggest your dad should’ve given up his ticket for you??? I’m sorry but what age are you? You’re coming across as a self entitled 12 year old child not a grown woman with children. This is one of the daftest whinges I’ve ever read. Your parents are 100% entitled to have a lovely night out with their son and his gf without you expecting an invite or for your dad to give you his ticket, good lord, stop saying “leaving one child out” you’re NOT a child!! Was it your brother bought the tickets as a treat for your mother’s birthday or both parents or what? Why don’t you suggest going on another night out with your parents yourself when ex has the kids? I’m sure your brother won’t give a rats arse about being left out in all honesty.

Lady you’ve got some SERIOUS issues going on 😂 She wasn’t invited, it’s her brother and gf going with his parents, it’s as simple as that, a group of 4 people, she didn’t even have a ticket, she already stated it wasn’t his night to have the kids, he already had tickets bought himself to go anyway, he is a fan, she isn’t a fan it’s not rocket science, if this was other way round and he wanted to go being a non fan and she already had tickets and he asked her to have the kids you’d be team OP here too, your issues are not her issues, you’re calling this man names because he just said he couldn’t take the kids as he had tickets himself and she had none anyway which is unfair to him, even if he had agreed or gotten someone to mind the kids she still didn’t have a ticket! Don’t get me wrong, I know all about being “left holding the baby” but in this case attacking him over something she’d no interest in seeing or couldn’t anyway when he’d already arranged to go, is unfair. Next you’ll be agreeing her saying her dad, an actual fan, should’ve given up his ticket so she could go with her mother brother and his gf instead just because he’s a man 😂

I think that's where the band got their name actually. IIRC.

That's not your family's issue, that's yours. I can't believe you want them to miss out bc you have a child, that you presumably didn't involve them in the decision to conceive? Why should they miss out, on their birthday of all days?

Whaaaa? Maybe this is something you need to learn!