To get irrationally angry at train behaviour

[MisanthropeLikely]

I'm not an angry person, but I'm thinking I might be becoming a Victor Meldrew when travelling. Particularly by train. Particularly long distance. Specific behaviour that enrages me:

1. People that have loud phone conversations or video calls on trains

1. People on long train journeys with limited space in the luggage rack who selfishly put their small bags on it rather than in the overhead, meaning people with larger cases have no space to put it

1. People who spend ages farting around standing in the aisle during boarding so no one can pass.

1. People who act like it's the Olympic 100m in their rush to get off

1. Men who manspread into the aisle

1. People who sit on your reserved seat and then refuse to move.

1. Lone travellers who take up 4 seater sections, preventing people in groups from sitting together

1. People who ostentatiously poo on trains. I mean, I get you sometimes have to go but some of the things people do are disgusting

1. Listening to music or watching videos with no headphones

10. Train stations that are massive but wait until 10 minutes before the train to tell you your platform so you need to have a stress race to make it with your bags.

11. People who wont move their bags off seats on an obviously full train.

I get irrationally angry about this stuff. My worst ever experiences were:

I was on a train once and this man had vrazely taken our reserved seats despite them being marked reserved and other empty seats. He'd set himself up some kind of fucking buffet on our table with a cloth and everything, then when I politely asked him to move, he told me to go and sit somewhere else because I was disturbing his meal.

Another time I was boarding a eurostar in an intense heatwave after a huge delay. It was roasting, I'd been standing at the gate for two solid hours in menopause sweats with a load of heavy bags. They started boarding. It's about 29 steps down to the platform, and a ramp os provided for people with luggage. The attendant was at the top of the ramp telling everyone who did not have luggage to take the stairs.

Anyway, there I am struggling to keep ny heavy suitcase from rolling right down the ramp and taking me with it, and some woman with no luggage at all aside from her small handbag decided to walk down the luggage ramp and overtake everyone on the inside. As there was no space, she moved her legs into my suitcase and then shouted at me "YOUR SUITCASE IS ON MY LEGS, WHY DONT YOU WATCH WHERE YIUR GOING"

I flushed bright red and said "I'm going downhill with a heavy bag I can barely control, multiple other bags and you walked into me trying to overtske", she turned and sniggered at me. A real deep, patronising snigger.

I still hold a grudge a year later.

Does anyone else experience these feelings or is it just me? I am petrified of flying so travel extensively by rail and I am at a point where I don't enjoy travelling because I feel so irrationally cross at inconsiderate and rude people.

Anyone else?

People who board the train while you are still getting off. Just wait it's not hard

I agree, selfish train behaviour really bugs me. I'm still annoyed about a time I sat with my bag on my knees leaving the other 3 seats free on a busy train. Only for two obnoxious women to sit down, block the window seat opposite me with a handbag, and offend my ears for the next hour.

Meanwhile other people were standing for the whole hour due to lack of seats.

This was 15 years ago...

I was impressed to see on an LNER train a couple if weeks ago they brought back luggage rooms. Makes a lot of sense on the long distance routes.

They also have bookable spaces fir bikes, which DH finds very useful for commuting!

My ds is a wheelchair user.

The thing that pisses me off the most is when he wheels into the spot reserved for wheelchairs and some able bodied person remains in the priority seat opposite with their legs stuck straight out in front of them and then buries their head in a boom to pretend they can’t see him and therefore aren’t being an arsehole.

I get it’s a priority seat and they may have hidden disabilities but tuck your legs in 🤦🏼‍♀️

slickly when people refuse to move suitcases the train staff have always told them too. Or move their pushchair or fold it up as you don’t need it up in a wheelchair space when your child is sat on a seat halfway down the carriage.

It mostly annoys me but it also amuses me that people think their slight inconvenience is so much more inconvenient than a lifetime disability.

I can ignore the rest of you just get but the space reserved for wheelchairs!

Mu husband insists I am a performative sneezer, and that I do it because I like to annoy him. We've had arguments about it - like, why would you think I would do that? If I wanted to annoy you, there are a million ways I'd go for before sneezing.

My sneeze are incredibly loud. Incredibly. And if I try to suppress them, they come out as a scream instead. I can't help it.

Everything else I agree with. Train travel really sucks. Has anyone mentioned reserving a seat but the seat reservation system being down 75% of the time?

I always sit at a forward facing table in a window seat. I get on at the end of the line and it’s never crossed my mind to keep the space free for a group that might get on ten stops along. Now I know it’s a thing I’ll still carry on sitting in the seat I like best.

Are you sure it was him who created all the mess? If I go into a messy toilet I have an urge to clean up in case the person who goes after me thinks that I did it.

Not all train companies allow you to choose specific seats, they just allocate whatever 4 seats are available, which may or may not be at a table. They often are, but on a busy train may not be.

People who act like it's the Olympic 100m in their rush to get off

I'm guilty of this one when I'm travelling to and from work. Most people dither around and walk painfully slowly and I can't be arsed getting stuck behind them. The driving equivalent of when someone pulls out in front of you to drive at 20 in a 30 zone. My peeve is when they block both sides of the escalator and seem oblivious when you ask them to please let you past (usually because they have headphones on and loud music blaring). .

I disagree with the no singles at four seat tables argument. You don't know in advance that the other three will just happen to be getting off at previous stops. Are you meant to get up immediately and look for a two seat? You might be in the middle of doing some work.

oh this x 100. I went to London recently, go there quite a lot as I have family there so am not unfamiliar with the journey but it is always stressful. This time after getting on the scheduled train, finding my reserved seat and getting settled down there was an annoucement that the train was broken and all passengers needed to disembark. So off we all got, stood around for a while as various garbled and incomprehensible annoucements boomed out. Everyone just asked each other and collectively worked out which platform the substitute train was on and when it was going to leave. Heaven help anyone whose first language wasn't English, we helped a lady who was totally confused. Then off we set, and half way through the journey more delays were annouced. We got to London an hour later than orginally planned. Journey back was almost as fraught with another cancellation.

On my regular commute with my colleague there was also a man who got the same train and I'd occasionally chat to. There was a lot of train strikes going on and trains were very busy. I was 9 months pregnant, although I had not mentioned it to the man it was visibly clear I was. Anyway, one Friday the train came and he took the last seat on the train, opened his book and got himself comfy whilst I and a lot of other people were standing. Luckily an older lady noticed as I was walking down the carriage and got another man to give up his seat for me. I went into labour the next day.
Still see said man on my commute. I no longer speak to him. My friend was fuming over it.

Agree.

Also lone travellers will often be travelling for work and be using their laptop. Unfortunately this is only really possible on the table in most trains as the rows of seats are so cramped and the pull down tables are so tiny and hopeless.

Nearly all these things could be solved by talking to people, I know that Talking To Strangers is the last resort and to be avoided at all costs but sometimes huffing and dirty looks aren't enough. "Excuse me" is very helpful.
Many booking systems reserve seats on flexible tickets so there are a many unused reservations, I think it's fine to sit down once the train starts if you are prepared to move later.
Also there are always some passengers who don't travel often on trains and need a bit longer to work things out.
It could be worse, at least on a train you have legroom and no reclining seats!

I can't reach the top shelve in a train. Yes, I'm that small. Some journeys mess with your bowels, not with mine but I know people with that issue, unfortunately.
The rest I'm with you, some people is just unconsiderate.

This wierd social disease of playing music out loud is maddening, and worse, watching reel after reel so you can't even tune it out as another sound starts every 5 seconds as they scroll. And it's not like its teens, it's loads of older people too, selfish prices the lot of them!

I used to use brown noise in headphones to frown it out but I have a toddler now so can't do that, have to suffer the second hand noise now. Grim.

I agree with most of your list OP, although as people have said, not everyone can lift a bag that might seem small to you into the overhead.

I agree that people’s loud inane conversations are maddening - to me, especially when they are loud inane conversations about their work. Last week there was a pair opposite me and the woman (as it happened) was trying to make theirs an incessant, loud and boring conversation but thankfully the man was having none of it and they soon settled into relative quiet.

I’m so glad you put the one about people’s limbs people in the aisle as this gives me the rage too. You need to move down the carriages often with a bag, and there are bits of people in the aisle. So you have to excuse yourself constantly, but they don’t always hear due to earphones so you have to keep asking or you’ll bash them with your bag (which I don’t want to do!). It is often a big manspread, often made more annoying by there being an empty seat on their window side that they could be using for their limbs!

Selfish behaviour breeds more selfish behaviour. It got worse in Covid and hasn’t stopped. It’s not just trains, it’s planes, parking everywhere. People stopping in the only lane of a road because they decide to “pop in” somewhere or deliver.
it’s not selfish to sit in a seat with a table if one is free, they are the holy grail of seats unless you can afford first class. What is selfish is staying there if it is clear someone else needs it more such as a family. If you need it to work crack on, but expect someone to sit by you that’s all. Easy.
I hate people near me if I could reserve the seat in front, behind and next to me I would 🤣.
people are disgusting in public toilets only use them in emergencies.
if a seat is reserved it’s reserved fuck off
like on planes if you’ve not paid to sit somewhere fuck off
if you want to fanny about in your bag and get stuff do it on your lap and get out of the way so the plane/train/bus can leave on time

Trains in this country are horrendous compared to Europe. I don’t know how we get it so wrong. Expensive, crap and unreliable.

No, I moved and sat somewhere else 😂

Lone travellers in a four seat - I get how some people need their laptop out.

But what gets me is the men who not only sit there (which is fine) but spread over the four seats and the whole table, with a laptop or whatever. I would never have the front to do that! The area is meant for four, regardless of whether or not they’re a group, and people need to just take up one seat’s worth of it, not the whole thing like a little train office.

Nonsense. I get on a train and find the most comfortable seat for myself. If there is a 4-seater available it means the train is practically empty. If it fills up then I am happy to share or move. Should I stand the whole journey just because somebody might want my seat?

I can't stand it when people treat public places as if they are in their own living room. Either it is getting worse or it is my age (50's)...I think it is getting worse.

I like a table, I also use my laptop, there are 3 vacant seats for other people to use. Why not try National Express in future if train journeys affect you so much. I look forward to your feedback because that one will be long.

I disagree about a solo traveller sitting at a 4 seater table. I travel regularly on my own on trains and do this all the time as it is more comfortable. Until I read that comment it never occurred to me that it would bother anyone. I don't spread all my stuff everywhere - just my little quarter of the table.

I hate people near me too. I love that some train lines have introduced Standard Premier which you can upgrade to on the day for a reasonable price.

So you have your standard ticket which is all my work will pay for (fair enough) and then pay the smallish price to upgrade to a better seat. It’s like first class without any refreshments. Suits me. I am likely ND though (waiting for assessment) and see this as a reasonable adjustment I give myself 😂