To get irrationally angry at train behaviour

[MisanthropeLikely]

I'm not an angry person, but I'm thinking I might be becoming a Victor Meldrew when travelling. Particularly by train. Particularly long distance. Specific behaviour that enrages me:

1. People that have loud phone conversations or video calls on trains

1. People on long train journeys with limited space in the luggage rack who selfishly put their small bags on it rather than in the overhead, meaning people with larger cases have no space to put it

1. People who spend ages farting around standing in the aisle during boarding so no one can pass.

1. People who act like it's the Olympic 100m in their rush to get off

1. Men who manspread into the aisle

1. People who sit on your reserved seat and then refuse to move.

1. Lone travellers who take up 4 seater sections, preventing people in groups from sitting together

1. People who ostentatiously poo on trains. I mean, I get you sometimes have to go but some of the things people do are disgusting

1. Listening to music or watching videos with no headphones

10. Train stations that are massive but wait until 10 minutes before the train to tell you your platform so you need to have a stress race to make it with your bags.

11. People who wont move their bags off seats on an obviously full train.

I get irrationally angry about this stuff. My worst ever experiences were:

I was on a train once and this man had vrazely taken our reserved seats despite them being marked reserved and other empty seats. He'd set himself up some kind of fucking buffet on our table with a cloth and everything, then when I politely asked him to move, he told me to go and sit somewhere else because I was disturbing his meal.

Another time I was boarding a eurostar in an intense heatwave after a huge delay. It was roasting, I'd been standing at the gate for two solid hours in menopause sweats with a load of heavy bags. They started boarding. It's about 29 steps down to the platform, and a ramp os provided for people with luggage. The attendant was at the top of the ramp telling everyone who did not have luggage to take the stairs.

Anyway, there I am struggling to keep ny heavy suitcase from rolling right down the ramp and taking me with it, and some woman with no luggage at all aside from her small handbag decided to walk down the luggage ramp and overtake everyone on the inside. As there was no space, she moved her legs into my suitcase and then shouted at me "YOUR SUITCASE IS ON MY LEGS, WHY DONT YOU WATCH WHERE YIUR GOING"

I flushed bright red and said "I'm going downhill with a heavy bag I can barely control, multiple other bags and you walked into me trying to overtske", she turned and sniggered at me. A real deep, patronising snigger.

I still hold a grudge a year later.

Does anyone else experience these feelings or is it just me? I am petrified of flying so travel extensively by rail and I am at a point where I don't enjoy travelling because I feel so irrationally cross at inconsiderate and rude people.

Anyone else?

Yep totally agree with all of these. The people who listen to videos etc with no headphones are the biggest idiots of all. Women who do their make up, often spraying things too also annoy me. Get up 10 mins earlier, or go to the ladies when you arrive.

Talking in the quiet carriage. I’ve given up booking a seat in it when I’m by myself.

Acting surprised that I want to sit in the window seat I’ve booked rather than their aisle seat. I always insist.

I once saw a man asleep with his legs across the aisle, feet on the far seat, so no one could get past. When he finally woke up it turned out he’d long missed his stop. Served the fucker right.

I agree with most of your points but if you need to work on the train, these table seats are the most suitable place as those little flip trays can’t hold a laptop properly. I often travel for work so need to read and reply to emails on the train. Groups can make a reservation for table seats if they prefer. We asked someone if they didn’t mind moving recently when travelling with work and there was 4 of us, and she was happy to.

Agreed, on long distance journeys I’m expected to work, and the tables are the most practical place to do that. People are always welcome to make seat reservations if they want to sit as a group.

My hill to die on is people who own fold up bicycles. My normal commuter train is standing room only and there’s always one fucker who has dropped their Brompton off in the vestibule, usually right near the door, so everyone is awkwardly standing around trying not to get grease on their clothes whilst they’ve swanned off to a seat.

Sorry, I am as entitled as a group of four is to sit in a seat with a proper table, if it is empty and unbooked. If it's so vital they can book.

I had two teenage girls behind me for 1 and a 1/2 hours the other day singing. With trills, X-factor style. By the time the train drew up in London I was positively homicidal.

And I fail to see why my desire for comfort, as a solo traveller , is rated lower than their desire to sit together. If other people need to join me, fine, but I am not moving to one of the airline seats.

Oh yes those who block the aisle while they twat about getting stuff in and out of their bags and slowly put their luggage in the overhead racks while you’re stuck behind them and can’t pass. Meanwhile those who boarded at the other end of the carriage have now taken all the seats despite me actually boarding the train before them but because of selfish twat blocking the aisle and twatting about with luggage I now have to stand up my whole journey! Absolutely gives me the rage!

I no longer book the quiet carriage. It's always full of loud, noisy, stupid fuckers. They irritate me less when they're not in the quiet carriage.

Only once found someone in my reserved seat who refused to move on a packed train and then a bag fell on his head. I laughed very hard.

I always ask people to move bags so I can sit down. I'm a total physical coward but it's one thing I'm weirdly fearless about. I'm always very polite. Nobody has ever refused or been arsey about it, even dodgy looking people.

Tbh, there's a lot to be said for coaches, if you can take one for your journey. They do take longer, and there are only a few seats available to reserve (I find people generally don't) but they do not sell more tickets than seats so there will always be somewhere to sit, and if you have a problem with someone not letting you have your seat or move your bag, the driver is right there to help you out and once you're seated, they're no less comfortable than a train. And they are MUCH cheaper.

Mostly YANBU, especially the people who appear not to understand what headphones are.

But sitting in a four solo I don't object to if someone wants to sit at a table. Blame GWR for cutting tables. Legs in aisle is fair enough; space is tight. I find most people move them in as I walk down the aisle. Bags not overhead is rude. Obviously there is an exception for disabled people but I doubt the luggage rack small bag people all have a disability meaning they can't use the overhead. Also a fellow passenger will generally put it up there if you ask them.

I must be lucky because no one's ever refused to move a bag or give me my reserved seat.

But I'll say it again: HEADPHONES! PLEASE!

I’m completely with you op. I was on a fairly long train journey recently and this guy got on , took off his shoes and socks and changed into sliders. His toe nails were grim. Honestly what is with people?

People travelling solo who sit on the aisle seat of a table give me rage. As do people who sit on the aisle seat where the window seat is free and stick their legs in the aisle.

I would say though that I sneeze loudly, it’s not performative, it’s just the way I sneeze!

People who dick around in the aisle = my biggest pet peeve. It's a one hour train ride, I think you can survive without your snacks and your portable home entertainment system. Just fucking sit down, you can get all your food and bullshit out once the train starts moving and the aisles are clear. How selfish do you have to be?

Also: people who sit in your seat hoping you'll either be a no show or won't say anything. Again, stop being a selfish twat: wait 10 minutes after the train starts to see whether im a no show

I agree. I travelled by train with my two children recently. It was last minute so there weren't any tables free. They sat together and I sat across the aisle from them. No issues at all. Yes a table would have been nicer but I wouldn't expect anyone else to move for us to have one.

OP why do you have so much luggage with you? One large suitcase that's so heavy you struggle to carry it and "multiple" other bags?! This is why it's so hard to find space for luggage on trains sometimes! Maybe try to pack light next time you travel and make your life a bit easier...

I think one of the really important things for a happy life is being able to shrug off minor vicissitudes.

You are taking these things way too personally, and have attached unwarranted meaning to irrelevancies.

Maybe think about cutting down on the luggage and traveling light. Sometimes I also do a Class Upgrade at the last minute (I’ve upgraded between Paris and Zurich for ten euros)

I don’t disagree with some of your points - taking another’s reserved seat is bad form.
And if you think you’re going to hog a 4-seat table with your bags, I’m going to ask you to move them, and then we will be chatting all the way to Gare du Nord!

I think you might be right that you are turning into Victor is Meldrew. We could all find things for which to turn into a curmudgeon, but why bother?

Oh and also: men and how they ALWAYS take the free seat next to a woman and leave the other men alone.
Are you worried youre going to "turn gay" or something?

We usually reserve seats but very often when we board, for whatever reason there aren't reserved seats so you just sit anywhere.
My pet hate is people who come on and insist they HAVE to sit in "their" seat even when passengers and even the conductor point out there are no reservations.

I agree with most of the grumbles on this thread but not this one. Just learn some patience!

By the same logic, if you board as a solo traveller, do you take a single airline seat next to another person, thereby leaving the other pairs of airline seats free for a parent and a child? I'd find that odd. I might offer to move for a family in a tight spot, but I'm not going to not sit at a table just in case. I might end up sharing with a group of three for example and that's fine.

Oh and also having lived on the continent for over a decade: what is it with British people and constantly eating on trains? 😅 As this is MN im sure im going to get a mass of people explaining why this is necessary for them due to health conditions and fair enough. But it doesn't explain the massive cultural difference you see. Its not that usual to see people eating kn trains in other European countries ive lived in, particularly short distance trains. I mean sure, obviously, it happens. But in the UK people are constantly at it, hopping aboard a one hour train and whipping out a takeaway, I find it gross. Not people eating in public, but i mean you've got this small (quite dirty) space with no fresh air coming in and then at least two people in the carriage slurping away.

Oh yes, bloody GWR and their reduced tables. We had a 7 hour journey back home after Christmas one year. Couldn’t reserve seats as if was engineering works. When we asked the woman on the train from Bristol if she would move her luggage from the whole table so we could join her with our 4yo so got really huffy and moved completely. There were only 2 tables in the carriage.

My old boss had a phrase that helps with this.

It’s not their fault they’re morons. Just reframes it ever so slightly, often to a way that’s less infuriating.

(Also, sitting at a table seat as a solo traveller becayse you want a table and are happy sharing it with three others, totally fair. Trying to take over a 4 person table seat, moron).

They have plenty of time to fuck about with their luggage once everyone else is seated. To block the aisles while twatting about with luggage so that nobody else can get past them means that people who have boarded at the other end of the carriage after you have now got on the train and taken all the seats despite you being one of the first in the queue to board. It’s just downright selfish and self centred. Let people get on the train and find a seat first, then once everyone is seated you can then get up and fuck about in the aisle getting all your snacks, iPad and whatever out of your bag.

Have you ever tried saying excuse me?

Gentle parenting of obnoxious brats (created by the gentle parenting) who are driving other passengers MAD.

'Oh Jacinta, that's a lovely drawing darling. Do try not to spill your juice on the nice lady.'

Has happened to me more than once (the gentle parented brats, not the juice LOL).

I hate people who leave all their litter on their seat/table when they leave the train so the next person getting on has to either sit surrounded by all the litter or take it to the bin themselves. Just take your litter with you, you lazy fuckers.

I also get very annoyed with people who stop right at the top/bottom of stairs or right outside the train doors to faff around with the handle on their suitcase. Just move to one side!