Was my BBQ hosting ‘stingy’ as my friend has suggested

[SingingJess]

DH and I hosted a couple of friends last night - we usually go out for dinner etc but with the nice weather agreed we would host a BBQ which they were very much up for. We exchanged messages in the week on what we’d cook and any drink preferences.

Here is the issue:

-Friend (wife) asked me where the food was from. I said most of it was Tesco’s finest BBQ range (we had a mix of chicken, burgers etc - it wasn’t cheap). She called this ‘not a bad budget option’ and said that when they do a BBQ, they raid the local farm shop. I’m sure that’s lovely, but also out of our budget.

-One of the drink requests was for flavoured gin which the husband likes. Now my DH also likes gin, and we have a lot of bottles here. So rather than spend money on a new bottle, we put out the gin that we have. Friend (wife) whilst in the kitchen with me pointed out a bottle of gin from Lidl and casually said that I ‘can’t expect her husband to touch something from there’.

-Later in the evening, she told me she thought it was a bit stingy of us to ‘recycle’ gin we already have rather than buy a new bottle for the occasion.

They both said thanks at the end of the night for us hosting and for the food, but I got the impression they were unimpressed.

My question is - was I being tight or do you not see an issue in us not investing in a brand new bottle of something we already had plenty of?

Snotty bitch

If this is real she sounds like a massive dick

They were very very rude OP end of. You did nothing wrong.

Are you the OP's 'friend' or another Margo?
What a lot of snobby nonsense, hosting friends not the bloody royals, not that should matter, they too are human like the rest of us.

Our local farm shop used to be full of snobs, thinking they'd made a great success of life because they were at the Gog farm shop. I knew they bought their fruit and veg from the (not as prestigious) local greengrocer.

Your friends a dick.

Ugh, that’s foul OP. And tacky as hell. The proper affluent people I know would die rather than throw someone’s hospitality back at them like that. Unforgivably rude.

Who on earth voted YABU? 🙄
I would be made up with this, as they have shown you who they are.
You are very kind to host a BBQ, however some people are just wankers. 😬

As for Hyacinth Bucket, I wouldn't be inviting that snobby cow around for a BBQ or drinks again.
She can shove her flavoured gin up her jacksy 😆
They' e 've done you a favour IMO.

Fuck me, sometimes I cannot believe my eyes on this place. OP, your friend is a pure dickhead. And @Velmy - good for you having the funds to splash £100 per head for decent stuff. That leaves all the more cheap supermarket Tesco's finest for the rest of us.

Was it ‘decent’ tho?

Well they are being unpleasant and I wouldn't want them as my friends.

That said, some cheap spirits can be like paint stripper. The meat should be fine though.

I don't quite understand how you can afford to go out with these picky people to restaurants yet not afford to barbeque, which should be cheaper if anything.

They were rude.
There was nothing stopping the DH bringing a bottle of the flavoured gin knowing that your DH also drinks gin as a contribution to the BBQ. Who goes to a BBQ empty-handed anyway?

"She called this ‘not a bad budget option’ and said that when they do a BBQ, they raid the local farm shop. I’m sure that’s lovely, but also out of our budget".

Rude fucker. She should have kept quiet and moaned about it to her husband afterwards if she was that bothered. She could decide she doesn't want to eat at yours again if the food isn't up to her farm shop standards - that's her choice.
I would have said exactly what you wrote here in response to her "raiding the local farm shop"."I'm sure thats lovely but it's out of our budget I'm afraid".
More people need to understand that so many people can't afford things like that any more. Not everyone has the money for farm shops.

Don't invite them again .

You need better friends. We love BBq's and Sunday dinners and our DD & DS both bring their partners around most weekends for dinner. All love the food cooked, the atmosphere and the drink. In fact they are so regular now we think they have a serious preference for coming to ours now. If they ever passed comment on the quality of the food 7 drink they would be directed to the door to go and buy whatever 'extra' they wanted themselves without hesitation.

All our food is a mix of Aldi & local butchers value deals. Nothing extravagant at all.

Very very rude, and actually a bit strange as well. Who refers to an open bottle of spirit as 'recycled'?!!? We have dozen bottles of whisky, gin, vodka, rum etc all obviously open and we just serve/drink them as we need them. All my friends and family do the same. It would never cross my mind to buy a new bottle just to serve at guests, if I had an other one with enough for the day (it's another matter if the bottle is nearly empty, very old etc).

Your 'friend' is incredibly rude and also an idiot.

How is drinking gin from a bottle you've already opened 'recycling' it? 😕What's the alternative? Does she throw away most of a bottle every time she opens one? Does she neck the lot every time? That would seem to suggest a problem. Does she demand that pubs and bars open a new bottle just for her every time? This is a seriously weird attitude!

Can’t imagine why you’re friends with them OP. They sound awful - rude and entitled - and they probably would have nitpicked whatever you’d provided. Tesco finest range do some lovely barbecue stuff, and it’s not cheap - it sounds lovely. And if the husband wanted his precious flavoured gin he should have brought it himself. I’m interested to know if they brought anything or turned up empty handed.

She wanted to make a point that she is posher than you.
Next time they can host their deli BBQ.

They sound grim! WTF! As pp say shades of Margo from the Good life .I would not be inviting them again TBH . snobby twats

These aren't your friends.

CF if they wanted a specific drink they should have brought a bottle with them.

Extremely rude guest who would never be invited to my house again. End of.

Ditch the snobby friends. Why on earth would you buy new gin to serve in your own home when you have plenty already? It’s not like you were guests taking a half used bottle of gin as a gift for hosts! Tesco finest is a perfectly acceptable food option, too.

I think they were rude. Even if they felt that way, they should have kept their opinions to themselves. However, it depends on how close you are to someone; you can be brutally honest with those you trust.
Also if you asked about drink preferences, why not try to accommodate them? Alternatively, you could say that you don't have certain options but invite them to bring their own. Have they hosted you in the past?

Arf at "recycled" gin 😁
They're a pair of knobs, op, but surely this isn't the first indication of that? Were they relatively normal before?

Imagine wanting something specific and not taking it with you! They were really rude and I wouldn’t be hanging out with them again!