Wwyd

[loveforautumn]

My mum and dad have a holiday home in Spain, lovely places and we've had some fab holidays over the years anyway, the upkeep of the places obviously costs and we're expected to contribute when using it which is fair enough, I wouldn't not and want to help them out. My sister however keeps going over there for free,no contribution or anything, hasn't even mentioned it. My parents just let het go and dont say anything.
What's annoying me is we're still expected to pay and if we didn't something would be said.
Am I right to feel annoyed that they go for free and im still expected to pay? We havent gone since finding out they aren't paying as i dont think its fair.

hello???????? joke!

not if my sis had to cough up and I didn't

Honestly, just stop worrying about what your sister does or does not do and concentrate on living your own life. It’s between her and your parents and not really any of your business. You pay towards the house because you feel that’s the right thing to do, why would you stop going?

Comparing yourself to your sister (which is the real issue here, let’s be honest) and getting worked up about what’s “fair” is not healthy adult behaviour.

I agree. If you stop going and they're not getting any money from you,they might have to get it from elsewhere IE the sister. I'd be very hurt at the blatant favouritism 😮

What would I do? Call it out! Tell them you are going but you aren’t paying if she doesn’t, end of!

I appreciate the unfairness of the situation but it seems that your sister and her bf have a sense of entitlement that isn't likely to change.
If you stop going, you will lose out of the enjoyment.
Life isn't fair

I can see why their lifestyle choices irritate you. I also cannot abide favouritism within families. Just do your own thing and go elsewhere on hols then you won't be annoyed by it

except if the expectation is that they should contribute and the expectation is that the sister should not...

@loveforautumn your parents are fools for paying their flights!!!! I dont think people on benefits should be going on holiday! if they are, then they are being paid too much!! no wonder this country is on its knees! have you thought of taking it off your parents hands? then saying to sis, NO??

If the contribution is £100 and you could never get alternative accommodation for the same cost, you’re going to have to suck it up.

If the contribution is £1000 and you could get alternative accommodation for a similar amount, stop going.

There are millions of people on benefits who work. There are thousands of disabled people on benefits.

You think those people shouldn't be able to go on holiday?

I know people who are on benefits who will only work 16 hours and no more as they say it impacts on their benefits.
I also know of people who work ft and receive uc as a top up.
I know disabled people who work and others that don't /unable to work.
So a lot of variations and important not to generalise.
It seems unfair that people can choose to work no more than 16 hours and receive benefits whilst they could be working more but choose not to.
I also know several people who work more than ft to meet their financial responsibilities.

'A lot of people'? Do share your sources/figures, pp, I'd be scintillated to know exactly how many of these wastrels there are and how they're getting away with it... 🤔

It's highly likely they're not 'choosing' to work less. In many cases the costs involved in childcare and transport to work do indeed leave someone no better off working than on UC.

Well, my grandad, my dad, my four uncles, 8 of my cousins, countless people I went to school with.

If you’re not around families who have generational unemployment by choice, you wouldn’t believe it happens.

But it does.

Well have you mentioned it to them? And said your parents already pay a lot and should be expected to pay for all of the upkeep and that everyone who attends should contribute.

It seems your parents have asked them. If you are so angry about it, ask your sister directly or continue not to go. But like other posters have said, it's still probably a really good deal for you so in the end Ur missing out

What would happen if everyone thought like that?
I raised my son single handedly ( not well paid initially). I would likely have been better off if I was on benefits with additional entitlement to free school meals etc.
I worked ft and more when able to and lived on the edge financially for a significant time.
Cc costs, transport costs etc etc, all part of my responsibility

But that’s not how Universal Credit works…

It's conceivable, if business found themselves unable to recruit decent staff, that they'd stop paying such shit wages. Currently there are too many businesses taking the piss because they're well aware that (setting aside the shitty zero hours/gig economy) there aren't enough jobs to go round and people are vulnerable to exploitation.

YADNBU how fucking annoying!
6 kids on benefits and choose not to work!!!
No one will care less if you spend your hard earned cash elsewhere and stop contributing to the upkeep of the property but if it were me, I would feel a hell of a lot better 😏

I know there are families who do live like this, although I'll never know how they get away with it. However, I do think a lot of people exaggerate how much of it goes on.

I would definitely stop going. I agree you should cover some upkeep/expenses but on top of that you are paying for the wear and tear caused by your sister's family every time they visit.

They are doing it for the children. They'd probably never go on holiday otherwise.

This is what I was going to say. If big businesses can't get good staff maybe they'd start to pay a decent wage. It's outrageous the amount they pocket from people working their bums off - the people who keep them in business - and yet they still have to get topped up by UC because they can't afford to live.

Just a bit galling when people working can’t afford holidays.