Invisible at 60.

[canyouseemyhousefromhere]

Not sure if this is the right place but here goes….
As a 60+ woman I find it sad to think of myself as invisible. When I was in my teens, 20s, 30s, 40s and later I would have lots of attention from men. I am happily married to a lovely attentive man but when I’m out on my own I am completely invisible. Am I the only one who has just realised I’m old and undesirable?

Seems odd to me OP. I had my fair share when younger and really don't care, actually rather like, than men don't 'pay attention' to me like that now.

This.

I understand the sexual attraction fades from an evolution point of view but why do shop assistants ignore older customers?

Older people tend to have more disposable income so shops need to address their business model.

I feel that the vibe, body language, eye contact, voice and language used can really work for or against people. I give off positivity, been told this and it means people speak to me. This is men and women. So the invisibility doesn’t happen to me but invisibility really being discussed initially is the fact that men don’t hit on the poster anymore and that they are not openly looking at her as an object of desire.

I have always preferred to think that people are interested in what is in between my ears as opposed to my legs.

@LadyCrumb and @WideawakeinSanDiego I am totally grey as allergic to hair dye and am 59 and don’t have a problem getting noticed in shops. I have heard this before, I’m wondering if it’s a regional difference or is it the individual.

Why do you need the validation of men to feel visible. Work on your confidence and validate yourself. Im 46 never more alive or myself. Its nothing to do with attention from men.

I'm certainly starting to feel invisible now into my 40s. I don't mind too much, but the amount of younger people (often men) that just walk into me on pavements gives me an absolute rage. I kind of enjoy barging past people now, often walking three abreast, rather than moving out the way. They are quite often shocked to find me there at all. If I'm feeling really pissy I throw in a nice passive aggressive "oh I am sorry, did you expect me to step into the road?"

I explained this to my DH (in his 50s) and he said he felt exactly the same, just had no idea it was a 'thing' us women have been talking about for years.

@ScupperedbytheSea
I barged through the middle of a large group of youths a few days ago. They were completely blocking the pavement and seemed oblivious to passers by. Not sure I'd have done it without the help of my dog though.

I think that is just people being thoughtless. I find that young women are worse for that than young men! I hear you, though, it is really irritating but I'm not sure it is anything to do with us getting older. It is young people being glaikit (as we say in Scotland!)

Yeah most men younger than 50ish won’t find you sexually desirable. So what. Why does that make you invisible?

Exactly. Plus I don't get why a woman over fifty would want a young man anyway. I don't understand women my age who enthuse over 25 year olds, they look like babies to me.

They don’t in my experience. Maybe it’s a regional thing (I’m 60 and have been greying/grey since my early 50s).