Encounter in the woods with a man...was I being silly?

[Woodwalk]

I walk in a local woods daily. Today I parked in the small car park where there were around 4 cars already. Changed into my boots, tied up my hair, no one else arrived in this time. Then I set off down a trail which begins running alongside the main road to the right, to the left is an inaccessible woodland - too dense to walk through. You can only enter the trail from the car park (at that end).

I had only been walking for around a minute or two when I got the sensation I was being watched/followed. This is strange as I would only have expected to meet someone head on on the path - given that there's one entrance and I saw no one else arrive at the car park within a minute of myself.

Anyway I turned round a few times and finally spotted a man behind me, slightly off the trail nearer to the side where the road is (trees are between the main road and me). I immediately did feel uncomfortable as I wasn't sure where he had come from, and debated stopping so that he could move ahead of me. I decided against this as didn't want to make a big thing of it.

Instead I kept going and took a turn off into a large shaded area, a clearing where I could see the original trail and find a little tree trunk to sit on (and look normal!) as he passed.

Instead of passing the man followed me into the clearing. I had walked quite far into the clearing to find a tree that gave a lot of space around me. He made a beeline for me straight towards me. I felt scared, and then he met my eyes and asked how my day was going. I immediately went into flight mode jumped up blurted out something about not wanting to be followed on my walk and started to run back to the car park (around 6 mins running). He shouted after me to come back, he didn't mean to scare me, he hadn't been following me, he was lost, he was sorry, come back please.

I just ran all the way back to the car and left.

I'm a woman in early 30s the gent was late fifties I think, and very overweight, if he tried to follow me back I couldn't tell, but don't think he could have matched my pace. He didn't have a dog, but then, neither do I.

Now I'm wondering, was he innocently lost and wanted a chat? Was I being silly to run away? It doesn't really matter now as I'm obviously safe and fine but the woods is my favourite place to go and I feel really put off returning now. Need a reality check as feel a bit silly now but in the moment I was scared.

Spread the word if I were you OP.

Many years ago when I was on one of my college placements and aged about 19 I always used to get my bus home at the same stop. One evening it was pouring down with rain and a car drew up, stopped and the male driver wound the window and offered me a lift. Of course, I said no, but he tried to engage me in conversation, discussing how cold and wet it was. Then he said, "It's Susan isn't it?" I replied no and had the good sense not to tell him my name. He replied "Well I call you Susan and I see you here every evening" My bus was in view by this time and I said something about having a boyfiend who would be waiting for me and he drove off . This was a long time ago and I would like to think that today a young woman would have said "fuck off creep", taken the reg number and reported him.

Always trust your instincts

Glad you are reporting this- it's very suspicious behaviour, and I can't believe any men wouldn't realise how potentially intimidating it would be. Which pretty much rules out the innocent intentions as far as I'm concerned. You did well to run- many would let the drive for politeness override their instincts.

Ive got lost in the woods too, the moment i spotted someone at a distance i called out for help. I was practically hyperventilating. I didn't follow in a creepy manner and try to strike up a conversation. Spot on instinct there.

This
Plus you wouldn’t sneak, you’d say hey please can you help me.

He was a creep and you did the right thing following your instincts. Never doubt them.

At the very least, he ruined your walk, what a bollocks for that. I’m so annoyed!!!

Don't waste another second more on wondering if you offended him.

I would not buy for a minute that he was lost, with the way he was lurking and watching you. He's most likely a pervert. Unless he is mentally challenged, he will know that following a woman is seen as threatening behaviour. So even if he had no designs other than to have a bit of a chat, it's aggressive and insensitive. Guys like him are why I carry a folding knife when I walk in the woods. You did right.

@ComemosZanahorias how frightening. I thought of Rachel Nickell when I read your post.

Each of us needs to make a vow to take self-defence lessons.

Adult human males are the most dangerous animals on the planet and women are their first prey. I’m glad you trusted your instinct.

Not to be too dramatic but there was a case a few years ago where a young guy was behaving suspiciously in a not dissimilar situation, he was reported to police who attended and found him with a knife. He was stayed and linked to two murders. He was later convicted of killing 2 complete strangers - a homeless man and a young female student in Colchester on two different occasions.

It sounds very dodgy and you were right to run and to report it. Women being polite, avoiding confrontation with men etc is what men like this count on.

Im glad you’re ok, it sounds awful.

Yeah 1000% this. That’s not how somebody lost,following a woman on her own behaves…

100% did the right thing.

You followed your gut, assessed the situation and acted fast.

Women have been conditioned to be polite instead of following their gut, which is probably why you feel ‘silly’. Don’t doing yourself you did nothing wrong. If one of my DDs are ever in the same position I’d want them to do the same.

But will the police really do the paperwork/report for this? Must admit I’m on a bit of a downer with the police atm. Got robbed at King Cross station last month. Security cameras were within range, and I reported it. Received a very brief response two weeks later advising that they wouldn’t be doing anything because it would take up too much manpower 🤷‍♀️

Happened to me before. Saw a man in the woods, followed me from the car park, I then turned to stay within sight and I could see him hiding in the trees/bushes, he was there for a while before leaving. I was with my big dog so don’t know if he was being a creep or just admiring the trees.

either way trust your intuition, who care if you make others feel uncomfortable

I don't think for a minute that they don't understand that following a woman is seen as threatening. They don't care.

I always bring a small can of hairspray and a knife when I go walking in the forest. First I plan to maze and then cut off his testicules. Ok, probably will just maze and run

Next time just say to him, with a direct stare, 'Fuck. Off'.

We need to teach our girls that's it's fine to be rude. It's fine to confront and not back down.

Because these men take advantage, always.

You did the right thing. Fuck 'politeness' and always trust your instincts. FWIW I think a personal alarm is a good thing to carry even in an area where no one is likely to hear it. The noise can startle and act as a deterrent if nothing else.

I think you're absolutely right to do what you did. Within a couple of minutes you felt you were being watched - so within a couple of minutes he'd managed to get himself lost going in the only entrance that he could get into? don't doubt yourself he was absolutely up to no good whether that was 'just' trying to make you feel uncomfortable or whether he was going to try and do something worse.

Why are you telling me this specifically, particularly in response to a post in which I shared that I had been gang raped?

Did you think an account of opportunism -
the situation was put in their way so they could - not to mention the tired NAMALT defence is in any way a positive or helpful response to a woman in this position?

Did you report to the police? Maybe he was lost or just lonely and wanted a chat, or maybe he is known to police and is a sex offender? You can never be sure and he easily could have lunged at you. I would have felt uncomfortable and run off too.

Something like this happened to me. The guy knew my name. I'd never seen him before in my life. I ran faster than I ever knew I could. Thankfully, faster than him.

My boyfriend at the time insisted I contact the police. They asked me to go in and make a formal statement. There was little chance of finding him but they said having the incident recorded could help a future investigation if it happened again.

I'm sorry to say this OP but I wouldn't visit that trail again alone and I'd let others know what happened. I know we should be able to go where we choose and be safe but sometimes we can't. He might have noted your car reg, he may even have followed you before without you knowing. He may follow other women if you don't go back.

If it hadn't happened to me I'd probably think this advice was an overreaction but it did happen to me and I know that it isn't. You got spooked and you got away with it thank goodness ❤

Don’t justify yourself. His intentions are irrelevant, he scared you. What dickhead wants to chat with a lone woman in the woods? A dark wrong un that’s who.